DISCLAIMER: The Devil Wears Prada and its characters belong to Lauren Weisberger and 20th Century Fox. No infringement intended.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Tip of the pen to Brithna who inspired me to turn my political rant (http://marygriggs.livejournal.com/86330.html) into fiction.
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.
FEEDBACK: To http://marygriggs.livejournal.com/

Chick-Fail-A
By Mary Griggs

 

"Can you believe those idiots?"

Emily never even looked up from speed typing the notes she took during the last features meeting. "What are you blathering on about now?"

Andy started pulling items out of the Smith & Wollensky bags. "I passed by a Chick-fil-a on my way back from picking up Miranda's lunch and the line was down the block."

"And you were upset because you weren't able to stuff your face with something deep fried in grease?"

"Um, no." Andy pulled a set of silverware out of the drawer and carried everything into Miranda's office and set it out on the glass surface. Returning to her desk, she asked, "Haven't you heard about this so-called appreciation day?"

"Unlike you, I do not fill my RSS feed with stories about fast food restaurants."

"You would have to be under a rock not to have heard about this. The COO of Chick-fil-a is a huge supporter of what he calls traditional biblical marriage and recently made several speeches about how gay marriage invites God's judgment on our nation."

"This is a surprise to you? Those religious wankers have been going off about marriage equality for years."

"This isn't about religion or making speeches. Chick-fil-a gives millions to anti-gay groups."

Nigel dropped off a folder onto Emily's desk. "My, my, An-dre-ah," he said, drawing out her name like Miranda usually did. "Since when did you become a gay activist?"

"My family and I have always been fighters for equal rights and to put an end on political limits on love."

"That's pretty brave."

"With all due respect, I'm not being brave. I'm being a decent human being."

"Unfortunately, not all people think the same." Nigel shook his head. "With sales booming from all the hungry, hungry homophobes, what can we do about it?"

"We can protest!"

"Why bother?" Emily rolled her eyes. "Let the haters eat bad food. They'll clog their arteries and become extinct."

Andy ignored her co-worker. "I heard that a local LGBT equality organization is trying to put together a kiss-in at the restaurants," she said.

"A kiss in?" Nigel raised an eyebrow. "That could be interesting." He narrowed his eyes when Andy blushed. "I think you've been holding out on us."

"Huh?"

"While that color is gorgeous on you, playing dumb doesn't suit you." Nigel wagged his finger at her. "Fess up!"

"I believe that love is a human experience not a political statement."

"Which means what, exactly?"

"Like a lot of people, I experimented in college," Andy said as she tossed her hair back.

Emily looked up and asked, "You're bi?"

"Labels are for clothes, not people!"

"Are you saying there won't be any girl on girl kissing for you?"

Whatever Andy was going to say was forgotten when she looked up to see Miranda standing behind Nigel with her hands on her hips.

"This is the level of discourse when I'm not in the office? Obviously, you all need more work to do. Find some or I'll find some for you." Miranda threw her purse at Emily and stalked toward her desk. "Andrea, come."

Nervously, Andy smoothed her skirt and made her way into Miranda's office.

"Close the door."

Andy obeyed and then turned to face her boss.

"Tell me more about this kiss in," Miranda demanded. She laced her fingers together and rested her chin on them. "I will need to know the time and place if I'm to let my new public relations firm prepare."

"Prepare for what?"

"For our attendance, of course."

Andy opened and closed her mouth several times. "Our?" she finally croaked.

"Well, yes. All I've seen are some very ugly people with their sacks of sandwiches and waffle fries, saying ugly things about gays and lesbians. I think it behooves us to show some beautiful people being supportive."

Miranda leaned back in her chair and gave Andy a slow once over. "You certainly qualify."

Andy had to force herself to keep from visibly reacting to being the sole focus of Miranda's famous scrutiny. She did shiver a little upon receiving a slight nod.

Smirking at the almost imperceptible tell, Miranda said, "I don't want to have our first kiss on a dingy street, though. Why don't you plan on staying for a while after delivering the book tonight? We can use the time to practice."

"P…p…practice?"

"Clearly you are still feeling intimidated by me. I think it will look most natural if we can work out the kinks in private."

Andy felt faint. "Kinks?"

"Well, I'm sure we will have to do plenty of experimenting to figure out what works best. Naturally, all that yoga and Pilates I do has strengthened my core and made me very flexible but I do have concerns about your stamina."

Her brain nearly broke as she visualized just how flexible Miranda could be. Andy raised her hands in surrender. "Miranda, wait. Please, just stop talking for a moment."

Closing her eyes, Andy forced her manic thoughts to calm. She tried to consider all the angles: She was aware of the press that Dan Cathy, Sarah Palin, Mike Huckabee and others had garnered by advocating discrimination. She knew that Miranda Priestly was more than just a fashion icon and her presence in opposition could help change the conversation from free speech or freedom of religion and back to the restaurant chain financially supporting hate groups.

Moving from the political to the personal, she thought about her family: While her parents might have an issue with her getting involved with her boss, they always encouraged her to follow her heart and were supportive of her friends who were open about their sexuality. Thinking about her heart, she wondered if Miranda, with her drive for perfection, work-a-holism and history of extremely bad breakups, would make a good partner for her.

Opening her eyes, she looked at Miranda and admitted to herself that the possibility of getting kissy face with Miranda was making her sex clench.

"Okay, if we do this thing, what exactly does that mean?"

Miranda walked around her desk and leaned back against it. "My biggest disappointment has been that the men in my life could never keep up with me. I tend to get involved with the same sort - stylish, slender, worships what the magazine has made me. But you have always been different. I mean, you didn't even know who I was when you started."

Andy opened her mouth to defend herself but closed it when Miranda shook her head.

"You've seen me at my lowest, Andrea. You've seen me and you've stayed." Miranda brushed the signature curl of hair from her forehead. "Let's go ahead. Let's take this chance. We might not change the minds of the bigots but we can build something together."

"You believe there can be an us?"

"I have hope. My God, together we can live on it."

The End

Some of the words spoken by Andy were actually said by Anne Hathaway upon receiving an award at the 2008 HRC Los Angeles Gala Dinner:

"There are people who have said that I'm being brave for being openly supportive of gay marriage, gay adoption, basically of gay rights but with all due respect I humbly dissent, I'm not being brave, I'm being a decent human being. And I don't think I should receive an award for that or for merely stating what I believe to be true, that love is a human experience not a political statement. However, I acknowledge that sadly we live in a world where not everybody feels the same. My family and I will help the good fight continue until that long awaited moment arrives, when our rights are equal and when the political limits on love have been smashed."

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