DISCLAIMER: Xena: Warrior Princess and its characters are the property of Renaissance/Universal Pictures. No infringement intended.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: My wife asked me to write this and I admit that X/G are a fandom I've never written for before. If their voices are wrong I apologize. Post FIN
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.
Even in Death
By Little Mac
I've been at sea for three days now, the crew is afraid to approach me and so my time is spent alone and yet not alone. I feel her presence behind me, standing guard over my right shoulder as she always did when she was alive. I can see her when I turn my head and I'm not sure that I'm not losing my mind though she assures me she is real.
I know she's disappointed with me, I acted in vengeance, seeking solace in the only way I could. I killed Akemi, now I have her soul to reckon for and no excuse other than being blinded by pain and loss. For six years we travelled together around the world, thirty if you count the 25 years Ares froze us and during those years we moved from friends to lovers to soul mates. She is my destiny and the thought of going on alone without her is more than I can bear most days.
At those times I feel her arms around me and I hear her words of comfort. "Even in death Gabrielle, I will never leave you." I remember when she said them for the first time; we were fighting the Persian army and my death was so close, the poison from the arrow coursing through my blood, and she held my hand, saying the words I needed to hear.
I never thought she would go first, and a part of me is so very angry that she wouldn't let me bring her back. I had time, I could have just dropped the urn into the water and she'd be by my side now, flesh and blood and more than likely 6 feet of very pissed off warrior princess, but by my side nonetheless.
I wanted to be that selfish; those forty-thousand souls meant nothing to me compared to hers. Compared to the life we still had in front of us, the battles yet to face, the land still to explore, the love still to share. Now I have her chakram attached to my hip and the weight is unfamiliar, but it is all I have left of her really. I'll have to learn to use it of course, a single woman travelling through this world is an easy mark and I need to learn to survive on my own now.
"You're not alone Gabrielle." I hear her voice and feel her strong hand upon my shoulder, comforting me as only her touch does.
"I need you with me Xena, not just your spirit."
"I can't, you know what will happen to those souls if I come back. I have to choose the greater good. You taught me that Gabrielle, I can't turn my back on the most important lesson I've learned."
"I know. I just can't believe there isn't some way to for you to come back to me without sending those souls into eternal torment."
"The Gods are gone Gabrielle, there's no one left to grant me a favor."
"So I'll travel alone. A life of journeying has brought you to the farthest lands, to the very edges of the Earth."
"And to the place where I'll always remain... your heart. So, where to, now?"
"I think we should go south... to the land of the Pharaohs. I heard they need a girl with a chakram."
"Where you go... I'm at your side."
"I knew you'd say that."
"I promised you Gabrielle, even in death, I will never leave you."
"I'll never stop trying to bring you back."
"I'm counting on it."
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