DISCLAIMER: The Bionic Woman and its characters are the property of NBC. No infringement intended.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Written for Ralst's Seasonal Femslash Greetings and answering a Christmas wish-list for track7g. Woot, two birds with one fic!
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.
FEEDBACK: To Geekgrrl.lurking[at]gmail.com

Ghosts of Christmas Past
By Geekgrrllurking

 

Damn it, Dr. Ruth Truewell, does not cry.

At least, that's what the good doctor kept telling herself, but deep down, she knew it was a lie. Just when Ruth thought she had everything under control, when her logical mind told her that enough time had passed to heal her broken heart, the holidays would sneak up on her, bringing with it all the pain and memories again. She would get moody and depressed, eventually end up miserable at home devouring a carton of chocolate Hagan Daz while watching 'It's A Wonderful Life'. The burn of twelve year old scotch and falling tears inevitably followed.

Ruth sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose in an effort to distract herself from the sudden flood of memories. The smiling face that greeted her Christmas morning, the soft lips welcoming her, the dancing eyes filled with love as presents were ripped open. A gaping chest wound, gasping for breath as she lay bleeding out in her arms in a stark hallway.

Ruth shifted in her chair and glanced around her grey and glass office, trying hard to shake the memories. This year was going to be different if it killed her. Maybe she should disappear, hop a plane and get away for a while, anything to stop herself from going down that pity path again. She could take some time off and go to Mexico or something. Feeling somewhat calmer, Ruth turned to her computer and started searching online for a discount travel website. Her cell phone vibrated on her desktop.

"Truewell."

"There's trouble brewing outside of Seattle. I'm bringing in Sommers and I need you running the show. Meet me in the war room in fifteen." Ruth stared at the phone as the man hung up without waiting for a response. Jonas was definitely not happy about something.

"Great. Just great."


"That's just great Jaime, bail on me at the last minute for some stupid business trip!" Becca's parting shot still rang in Jaime Sommers' ears. Jonas as usual had impeccable timing, once again screwing up her home life. Jaime tried to get comfortable in the back of the company car, as the Berkut driver sped away from her tiny abode. Her sister had simply wanted a nice normal Christmas this year, baking cookies, sipping eggnog, decorating the tree together. Just like they had when their mother was alive.

Normal. Jaime sighed and watched the San Francisco cityscape slip by, Christmas lights twinkling and blinking happily away on various homes as they passed. Their mother was gone, their father aimlessly wandering the world, Jaime was the only normal thing left in Becca's life. The problem was that Jaime's life was no where near normal anymore.

Jaime stared out the car window, trying not to worry about how Jonas' latest assignment was going to further mess up things with Becca and how she was going to have to fix it. This Christmas was going to suck if this was any indication, she just knew it. She tried to ignore her stomach as it churned with guilt, knowing there was nothing she could do but roll with the punches. Sighing sadly again, Jaime noticed the driver glance back at her in the rearview mirror, concerned, but he wisely kept silent as they continued winding their way towards Berkut headquarters.


As much as she tried to ignore Jaime, Ruth found herself once again pleasantly distracted by their latest bionic test subject. If she was honest, she'd been attracted to the young woman for a while now, but like ususal she had stuffed those feelings deep down inside, after all the last time she'd crossed the line with a co-worker still haunted her. Besides Jaime wouldn't be interested in an old warhorse like herself.

Ruth watched as the attractive young woman slouched haphazardly in the chair beside her, yawning and looking like she'd rather be anywhere else, as she doodled on a piece of paper in front of her on the boardroom desk. Not that she could blame the obviously bored girl, as their boss continued to drone on and on.

Jonas Bledsoe finally started winding down the briefing. A terrorist cell was holed up in the mountains near Seattle, smuggling guns and drugs out of one of the local sea ports, right under the nose of the Navy and then transporting them off to Boston for distribution across the nation.

Ruth wasn't quite comfortable running the sensitive operation with someone as green as Jaime on board as a special field operative. Despite the success of their mission in Paris, outwitting the CIA and that damn agent Jaime was infatuated with, Ruth was still cautious where the girl was concerned. Whether she thought she was ready, or not, apparently wasn't important. Jae was unavailable for this mission, on assignment in Dubai, so that left Ruth and Nathan working with the new kid and a small black ops team for backup. Hopefully this would be a simple cut and dry infiltration and take down and she'd still be able to head off to Mexico for the holidays.

Ruth glanced over at Jaime's drawing as Jonas prattled on. It was a cute little Christmas tree with menacing rifles, bombs and knives underneath. She didn't need her psychology degree to see that someone else wasn't looking forward to working over Christmas either. It had been a pretty tough year for the girl, losing so much in such a short period of time and adjusting to major, life altering changes. Antonio's recent death had stirred up old feelings for all of them, and reminding them all at how short life really was. Looking up, she was startled to find bright green eyes staring back at her, almost daring her to say something. Ruth smirked, never one to back down from a challenge.

"Nice tree, but AK-47's curve forward here, not straight like you have it." Ruth whispered, taking her pen and adjusting the doodle accordingly before glancing up at the girl again. Their eyes locked for a moment. "Just sayin'."

Ruth smiled as Jaime's eyes seemed to glitter with amusement and the girl visibly relaxed. Maybe spending more time together on assignment would be okay after all.


"Everything's going to be okay Jaime. Just hang in there…" Ruth murmured to reassure the girl in her arms. How in the hell had things gotten so out of control so quickly? Digging with one hand through the meager first aid kit in her small pack, she found what she was looking for. Tearing open the gauze packaging with her teeth, Ruth yanked out the wad of cloth, and pressed hard against the bullet hole. She kept pressure on the oozing wound before finally wrapping it as tightly as she could, finally easing the injured woman down to lie on the floor

Jaime lay deathly still, a pale sheen of sweat covering her. She had not regained consciousness since she'd been shot by the gun runners. The wound wasn't pretty but at least it seemed to have gone straight through her. Ruth knew she just needed to keep her stable so the anthrocytes could do their thing, thankfully, despite how creepy that was.

"Damn it, where the hell is Nathan with those reinforcements?" Ruth quickly popped her head up and glanced out the log cabin window, ducking back down again as another round of bullets hit the thick wood wall with dull thumps, wood chips flying from the impact. This mission to Seattle was turning into a bigger mess than even Jonas had expected.

They had been on route to the cabin, having parked the vehicles some distance away and were making their way by foot, with Nathan staying in the van to coordinate communications. Ruth remembered looking up and seeing something dark and big in a tree and the next thing she knew she was face first in the snow, Jaime falling on top of her. A hail of bullets followed as their team and the terrorists fought. When she tried to move, she realized that Jaime was unconcious and that her hands were covered in blood. Jaime had been shot.

Her headset lost somewhere with her fall, Ruth waved to Benson, one of her men lurking nearby, to come help. She nodded towards the log cabin not 100 yards away and together they headed for it with the wounded girl. Firing all the way, they eventually made it to the relative safety of the porch. Pushing the unlocked door open Ruth made sure the coast was clear inside, and turned in time to see Benson clutch his chest and drop, killed by one of the terrorists. Falling with Jaime into the cabin, she kicked the door shut and lay there, trying to catch her breath and think.

Now, fifteen minutes later, Ruth still didn't know how the terrorists had seen them coming. She sank back down to the floor beside Jaime and ran a soothing hand through the long dark hair. This little one had saved her life, shoving her out of the way of the bullet that tore through her own body. Jaime still hadn't moved and the ball of worry in her guts churned a little more. The surprising chirp of a cell phone broke the silence and she grabbed it from Jaime's inner jacket pocket. Only one bar of signal showing, hopefully the connection would hold.

"Ruth?" Jonas' deep voice sounded calm, but Ruth knew him better than that. "Danielson was able to signal Nathan about the attack. I've got a second team half an hour away from your coordinates."

"Jaime's down, Jonas." Ruth's voice was deathly serious and the silence on the other side was deafening. She heard yelling in the background and the sounds of feet running, and the clicking of a keyboard being typed on.

"Nathan's just logged in and checked, her remote diagnositcs are all over the place." Jonas finally responded.

"She's been shot Jonas. What do you expect." Ruth pulled the girl back into her arms to try to keep her warm, the tactile memory flashing her back momentarily to another bloodbath in another time. that was then and this was now. Glancing down she noticed something sparkling. She stared at the blood still covering her own hands and clothes, and watched the tiny golden glow of anthrocytes as they suddenly activated and tried to make their way back to the brunette's body. That was new and freaky.

"Keep her comfortable until the anthrocytes kick in and start..." Jonas' voice started to fade.

"Jonas?" Ruth looked at the cell phone. Signal lost, he was gone. Sliding it into her pocket she felt the girl shift in her arms. Jaime blinked and then finally fully opened her eyes, looking around the room blearily.

"Ruth?" Jaime's voice was gravelly and rough, her body weak from fighting off the bullet wound. She relaxed as she finally found the blonde woman, her hazel eyes calm and in control. "What happened?"


"So what happened?"Jaime calmly sipped some more water and stared at the older woman who obviously didn't want to talk to her about it. Jonas' half hour had turned into six, and the two women were still pinned down in the cabin. Fighting continued all around them and the thunder of choppers and glaring spotlights regularly passed over head. On the small kitchen radio 'It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas' happily played away.

Jaime shifted, the movement pulling at the bandage covering her quickly healing wound. She winced and then relaxed again as she felt the warm tingling of her anthrocytes busily working away. She glanced at the fidgeting woman in front of her, the short blonde hair almost glowing white in the candle light, hazel eyes never quite meeting her own, but when they did it was if her soul was being pulled from her very body.

Oh yes, Jaime knew she had it bad for Ruth Truewell. Stepping in front of a bullet to protect her had been a no brainer, after all she was Ruth's muscle. A ghost of a smile crossed her lips as she remembered their first mission together. She wondered if that had been the beginning, when she had already started crushing on Ruth. She shook her head and turned her attention back to the older woman.

"Hey, I'm not Sarah Corvus, Ruth. I would never hurt you." Jaime leaned closer and slid a hand along a soft cheek into crisp blonde hair. "Let me in."

Ruth looked up from her spot on the floor, staring hard into the dark green eyes filled with determination and something else. Something more raw and wild. It scared her, this all scared her.

"But you could be Jaime. You very easily could be." Ruth watched the truth of that hit Jaime. The flicker of pain and fear was quickly followed by glittering anger. Sighing, Ruth put her hand over the one still resting on her cheek before the girl could pull away. Maybe it was time after all. "Corvus killed someone I cared for very much that night she went off the grid…It's still hard for me to forget, or to trust my heart to someone again."

Jaime let that sink in. Time to trust someone around here. Maybe time for Ruth to trust again too. Jaime moved away and hugged her legs, staring once again out the window into the dark night.

"Something about Corvus calls to me Ruth, and I'm afraid someday I'll answer."

Ruth said nothing, simply running her fingers along the dark tresses for a time, then pulled the younger woman into a hug. She needed this. It seems they both need this.

"Let me give you something to hang onto." Ruth whispered into the dark hair, feeling Jaime relax into the comfort offered by her warm embrace.

The scent of Ruth and the dark brown leather jacket she wore marked itself into her senses, forever linked in Jaime's mind with safety. She slid her hands inside the jacket and around Ruth's waist. Ruth felt like home.


It was almost surreal when they finally made it home in time for Christmas Eve. Jaime sat for a moment in the GTO, having pulled up to the apartment building door, watching the streetlights flickering on along the street. "Please come in Ruth."

Surprised, Ruth smiled wistfully. "Oh, I'm sure you want to get settled in with your sister."

Determined Jaime insisted. "Come on Ruth. Just a quick drink, warm up before you head home."

Against her better judgment Ruth nodded. "Sure. Grab your gear from the trunk, I'll park and be right back."

It had proven to be a tough assignment, but they had pulled through. The terrorist cell had been taken down and the shipment of weapons hidden in the mountains confiscated. Jaime had been worried she would miss Christmas with Becca completely, but Jonas promised that Ruth would be able to bring them in from the cold with plenty of time to spare. And true to form, the older woman came through with bells on.

Letting herself in the apartment, Jaime found Becca busily slamming the top of their old artificial tree into place.

"Mom never could get that in right either," Jaime said from the door.

"You're home! I didn't think you'd be back in time from that business trip." Becca happily thumped the tree on the floor trying to get the top to sit straighter. Looking up, she noticed that Jaime was not alone.

"This is a friend of mine from work, Dr. Ruth Truewell. Ruth my sister Becca. She was able to rearrange things so we could get home sooner." Jaime smiled softly at the older woman. "I'm just going to go dump my bags, I'll be right back."

Ruth moved into the room, watching Becca continue to struggle with getting the tree branches to drape more naturally. Had it really been almost five years since she had had a tree up? Trying not to dwell on the old memories threatening to overwhelm her, she shrugged out of her jacket and moved over to help the teenager. Time to make new memories.

"Thanks Doc," Becca smiled shyly. "I thought I'd be alone this year."

"No one should be alone at Christmas." Ruth smiled softly back. "Now let's get those lights untangled and on the tree."


The lights twinkled merrily on the tree as the threesome took a much needed break. While Ruth washed up in the bathroom the Sommers' sisters started making sandwiches.

"You like Ruth?" Jaime asked as nonchalantly as possible, putting mustard on her slice of bread.

"Yeah, she's nice." Becca cut a turkey sandwich in half. "You like her, like her don't you."

Jaime paused, then continued cutting her ham sandwich.

"Yeah, I do. A lot."

Becca smiled widely as she opened the fridge and pulled out the jar of pickles.

"Well, she's cuter than that psycho cheerleader you crushed on in the tenth grade." Putting the jar on the counter she popped the lid off. Jaime bumped her hips playfully with Becca's and duelled forks in the jar for the largest pickle.

"Nikki Lewis was not a psycho, " Jaime grinned as Becca stopped and stared at her sceptically. "Trust me, I know a psycho when I see one."

"Well, it looks like it wasn't just 'a phase' like mom said either," Becca elbowed her older sister playfully. "What is it with you and doctors anyway?"

Jaime crunched a bite of pickle off, wiggled her eyebrow saucily and took out the tray of sandwiches and their drinks into the living room.


Ruth stood in the living room. lost. The tree was finished, white lights glowing, family ornaments from years gone by hung with care, strands of white popcorn circling around, topped by a star at the very top. Becca had gone to bed, leaving the two of them alone at last. It had been one of the best Christmas' Ruth could remember and she didn't want it to end. Jaime wrapped her arms around her from behind and held her close, waiting.

"I don't know if I can do it again Jaime. If Corvus takes you down or I lose you on an assignment, I don't know if I can survive it." Ruth finally whispered, tears coming to her eyes. Jaime took her hand and lead her to the couch, pulling her down beside her and snuggling close.

"Hey, come on now. How do you know that we won't grow old together? The future is what we make it, and if there is one thing I have learned about you Ruth is that you are a survivor." Jaime murmured into the soft short hair tickling her nose. She watched entranced as Ruth closed her eyes and turned towards her gentle voice. She dipped her head and closed the scant distance between them

Their lips met for the first time, tentatively, then slowly grew more heated. A shiver of desire ran down Jaime's back as Ruth sank deeper into her mouth, their tongues sliding and dancing together. She gasped as Ruth moved across her jaw, nipping and exploring the long column of her throat.

"Are you sure you don't want to stay Ruth?" Jaime finally murmurred into the short soft hair tickling her nose. She watched entranced as Ruth closed her eyes and turned towards her gentle voice. "It's cold out and my bed is warm."

Ruth's breath caught, no mistaking the invitation being offered. Thoughts of honour and responsibility flitted through her mind, however visions of exploring tender flesh was rapidly trampling over them.

"Stop thinking so hard." Jaime breathed into her ear. Ruth turned to look at the young brunette tempting her resolve. Actually she was ripping her resolve into itty bitty pieces. Decision made, Ruth pulled Jaime into a gentle embrace bringing them ever closer.

"You're the only thing on my mind, Jaime." Ruth sighed into the dark woman's mouth, before claiming it once more.


Jaime woke with a start, quickly scanning the room for potential danger. Sleepily running a hand through her tousled hair, she glanced over at her sleeping lover. Ruth lay on her back, the street light giving her naked body a golden glow. Even without the help of her bionic eye, Jaime could clearly make out the definition of muscle hidden just beneath Ruth's soft skin. The toned muscles of her stomach were still slightly damp and Jaime was tempted to trace along the salty hollows with her tongue.

Damn she was sexy.

Leaning over the slumbering woman, Jaime gave into the irresistible temptation, dipping her head to lick and place lingering kisses down along the curve of belly, smiling against the soft skin as Ruth stirred but didn't quite wake. Kissing a winding pathway upwards across her lover's body, Jaime made her way up to nuzzle into the short blonde hair. She felt Ruth wake with a start and then relax back into the warm bed as she realized where she was and with whom.

"Sshh, it's just me." Jaime murmured softly as she continued to kiss and lick along Ruth's neck, finding the small patch of sensitive skin that she had discovered drove the older woman crazy. She pressed her naked breasts against her lover's, both women moaning at the contact. Jaime's nipples grew even more erect as she started to rock back and forth against her partner, the blonde wantonly writhing beneath her, the bed covers pushed completely off the bed with her feet.

Jaime finally shifted again, pressing a strong thigh between Ruth's legs, pleased with the needy gasp this produced. She smiled as the women beneath her spread her legs slightly, inviting more contact, feeling how wet she already was for her. She heard a low growl from Ruth, who bucked and rolled against her, obviously needing her to increase the friction between them.

"Do you want your Christmas present, Ruth?" Jaime whispered into an ear, her tongue following along the delicate swirls of flesh. She thrilled at the small hitch in Ruth's breathing as her roving hands scratched lightly down the toned body. Ruth tried to roll her over, to take control but Jaime easily held her in place, no match for her unnatural strength.

"No fair trying to peek, Truewell." Jaime rasped as Ruth just groaned in frustration.

"What do you want sweet thing, hmmm?" Jaime whispered hotly into a nearby ear. She smiled as Ruth pushed against her, needing more, needing her to increase the friction, but she pulled away. A trail of moisture clung to her fingers, evidence of her partner's desire Beneath her Ruth growled slightly.

"Please, Jaime…" Ruth gasped, her hands bunching and clenching the bed sheets around her.

Jaime moved against her again, back to where she knew Ruth desperately needed her to be. Sliding into the moist heat of her lover, she slowly penetrated her, claiming what had been freely given to her. Her breath hitched, hot against Ruth's flushed cheek as she felt the her throb against her hand. She started to thrust, steadily building the tempo. Again and again she filled her, taking her to the edge and keeping her there, such delicious torment, until finally it was time.

"Come for me, Ruth." Jaime murmured, knowing it was too much for her lover and Ruth came, shuddering hard with a loud moan. Jaime bucked against the strong thigh below her, giving in to her own body's needs, just listening to Ruth enough to push her over the edge too.

Ruth's death grip on the covers started to loosen, as they panted together, limbs wound and tangled, slowly calming as their spent bodies relaxed. She rolled Jaime to her side before tugging the sheets back up around them, and then sleepily settling in each other's arms. Slow sweet kisses and soft sighs eased them towards a well deserved sleep.

Soon Ruth's breathing grew deeper, Jaime knew that she was sleeping, safe in her arms. Jaime smiled, fingers dangling along her lover's bare back, idly tracing, memorizing the contours of her lover's body. She nuzzled into her soft blonde hair, content.

"I love you, Ruth. Merry Christmas."

Ruth's eyes popped open and tears welled up. Apparently it didn't matter that tough as nails Dr. Ruth Truewell was not supposed to cry. She just shook her head at her sappy side and hugged Jaime tighter. This certainly wasn't how she expected to spend her Christmas, but she damn well wasn't going to complain. Turning to kiss her lover's flushed cheek, she whispered softly into the night.

"I love you too."

The End

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