DISCLAIMER: Characters, some of the dialog and trekkie technology belong to Paramount and the Star Trek Dynasty. I'm just using them to string together a little tale from the depths of my mind as a cheap form therapy. No profit or copyright infringement is intended or expected.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: I would like to extend heartfelt thanks to my Beta Lenara who kept me on track and from wandering all over the Delta quadrant. This is my first attempt at writing fanfiction so any feedback and words of encouragement would be very much appreciated. Comments can be sent to firstname.lastname@example.org.
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.
CHALLENGE: Written for Epic Proportions 2009.
Living in the Past
B'Elanna woke to the late morning sun shining on her face. She was stretched out on the couch covered by a light blanket from the bed. Seven was not in sight. For a split instance, she worried that she had gone back to the ship having become fed up with all the bullshit of yesterday. Then she smelled something that resembled hot coffee. She sat up and looked over the couch to see Seven sitting at the table which was covered in various breads, fruits and beverages.
"I assumed that you would be regen sleeping late so I took the liberty to acquire suitable breakfast foods. I hope this is satisfactory?" Seven softly stated as she sat looking at the sleepy woman. She was making an effort to use less formal language as she continued to embrace her humanity.
Seven was rewarded for her efforts with a toothy grin from the dark woman which she returned with a smile of her own. "Thank you, it looks wonderful. Sorry that I fell asleep on you last night."
"I think we concluded our conversation last night. Thank you for your understanding. Are you ready to consume your morning nutrients?"
B'Elanna crawled off the crouch and began to walk over to the table when she noticed that her breath would offend a horde of Klingon warriors. "I'll be right there. Let me make myself more presentable first." Before exiting the bathroom, she called out, "Hey what do you want to do today? You still want to visit the technology center or do you have any other ideas?"
Seven was unsure if she should wait to answer her until she came out. She was not sure if she wanted to visit the technology center. Because of her experiences from yesterday, she felt that she had her fill of all things technological. That was not true, she just did not want to think about anything that has do with holo-technology, at least not today.
"Did you hear me? What do you want to do today? And don't say whatever I want to do because we know where that got us," B'Elanna said with a smirk as she walked out of the bathroom toward the table.
The blonde waited for her friend to sit at the table before answering her. B'Elanna sat across from her and dug into the food. She knew that there was more to talk about but she was afraid to do it now. Admitting to herself that she was afraid left a bitter taste in her mouth even though she was eating a sweet pastry. She wanted to tell Seven that she loved her. No that wasn't true; she was in love with Seven but didn't know how to tell her for fear she wouldn't feel the same towards her.
Seven watched B'Elanna with curiosity as she ate with a veracious appetite. She did want to spend more time with this woman apart from memories of their past. "I understand that there is a body of water just past the forest that is said to be pleasing to the eye. Would you like to see it with me?"
Taken by surprise that Seven actually came up with an activity, B'Elanna had to bring her napkin to her mouth quickly so she wouldn't spit food all over the table.
"Are you alright B'Elanna?"
Coughing to clear her throat, "Um yeah. You just surprised me that's all." Seeing the questioning look on her face, she continued. "So you want to go to a lake, that's sounds wonderful and relaxing."
"Maybe we could bring food to consume while we are there. I have heard that people take food and eat there."
"Seven, are you asking me out on a date?" teased B'Elanna. She felt her hearts sing for joy at the prospect of Seven possible asking her out on a date.
The young woman hadn't thought of the encounter being a date but remembering the pleasing time she had on their previous date she wanted to repeat the experience. "Yes. Yes I am asking you on a date to go to the lake."
"I accept. Should we take our swimsuits? It looks like it's going to be a nice day," B'Elanna asked with a smile plastered over her face.
"I enjoyed swimming the other day. I think that would be acceptable. When would you like to leave?"
"Let me take a shower first and then we can leave. We could pick up what we want to eat on the way to the lake. Why don't you pack a bag with our swim gear and a blanket to sit on at the lake and whatever else you think we might need while I shower, okay?" B'Elanna popped a piece of fruit in her mouth and took a swallow of her drink and rushed to the shower to get ready.
Seven went about the task of preparing for their date. She wasn't sure what all to pack, she was starting to have reservations, no it was more like nervousness about the activity she was about to engage in with B'Elanna. Her experience was limited to her one failed date, several social lessons by the Doctor and her successful date with B'Elanna. Since they were both considering this a date, she wanted it to be perfect. She hoped that they would become even closer.
B'Elanna was so nervous that it took her several attempts to get in the shower. The first time she walked in fully clothed, then she tried to go in wrapped in her towel and then she hit the controls for both the hydro and sonic shower to run at the same time. Going on another date with Seven was something she had hoped would happen in the future but to have Seven ask her was too much for her to handle. Once B'Elanna had successfully completed her shower she fussed over what to wear. It should have been a simple thing, but her nerves complicated the issue.
She finally exited the bedroom, Seven was waiting at the table with a bag packed on the table. The breakfast items had been cleared. Both women brightened when they saw each other. They knew that this day would be spent not visiting the ghosts of their past but together getting to know each other much better than they had already.
"Are you ready to go?" B'Elanna asked.
Seven stood as she replied. "I believe that I have packed the necessary items needed for our time at the lake."
"Great. I'm glad that you decided to wear your new clothes and not one of your biosuits. You look nice," she said with a smile toward the tall women. Although Seven was wearing casual clothing she had put her hair in her usual bun style which disappointed B'Elanna but she didn't want to upset her friend by mentioning it to her.
They went to the local open air market to buy the food that they were going to take with them. Seven had a good time picking out the food with B'Elanna to her surprise. B'Elanna had her try samples of various foods to decide what would taste good to her and at times would hand feed a sample to Seven causing her fingers to touch her lips. She allowed her fingers to linger on her lips moments longer then was needed to the hidden pleasure of both women.
It took more time then was needed to pick out the items for their meal but neither woman was in a hurry. They decided to walk to the lake instead of taking a transport. They spent the time talking about their experiences of the past several days, what they wanted to do at the lake and the activities they wanted to do on their last day on the planet. As they walked their hands would brush against each other or they would playfully bump into each other as they laughed. Both women were enjoying the increased physical contact they had with each other as they walked and laughed.
When they arrived at the lake, they picked out a spot that was shaded by trees with large leaves, secluded from other people and not too far from the lake. They laid out the blanket and set up their things.
There weren't many people at the lake, just a few couples and families scattered around the lake. All were spread out to afford themselves and others as much privacy as one could achieve in such an open space.
The pair settled on the blanket after they had finished unpacking their things. Seven was very meticulous as to how she laid out her items in contrast to B'Elanna who haphazardly put things in several little piles scattered across the blanket. The shorter woman tried to avoid the gaze of the blue eyes that threatened to bore a hole in the backside of her head knowing that the owner of said eyes probably disapproved of how she unpacked. B'Elanna tried unsuccessfully to hide the playful grin which caused Seven to raise her ocular implant as high as her blonde hairline.
Trying to get her mind off the mess, Seven asked, "What are we to do first?
B'Elanna chuckled lightly as she replied, "This was your idea for a date, what did you have in mind?"
The blonde got a serious look on her face thinking about the question. She knew that she should have a plan especially since the idea was originally hers. Sensing her distress, B'Elanna decided to help her out. "Hey, let's just sit here a while and talk. Then later we can go for a swim or there was someone renting watercrafts that we passed that we can take out on the lake."
"Then we can eat," Seven softly replied.
"Yeah, then we can eat," B'Elanna answered with a smile.
The couple sat in awkward bouts of silence which surprised both women since they had no problems previously talking about all sorts of things.
"So have you enjoyed you been enjoying your shore leave?" B'Elanna said feeling stupid for asking such a simple question.
Looking out at the lake, Seven answered with a matter of fact tone, "Yes I have enjoyed my shore leave. Have you enjoyed spending your shore leave with me?"
This question took B'Elanna off guard. She didn't want to come across to strong but her hearts wanted to shout, 'Of course I have enjoyed spending time with you. I want to spend all my time with you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you.' But instead she simply replied, "I have enjoyed sharing my shore leave with you a great deal. Thank you." She didn't look directly at the young woman but stole a glance at her. Realizing that they were not going to talk sitting here on the blanket she suggested that they go for a swim.
"That would be acceptable. Should we change here?" Seven stood making motions to begin to change her clothes.
Although they were well isolated from the others on the lake to change without being seen, the dark woman knew she would spontaneously combust if she saw this beautiful creature strip out of her clothes in front of her. "No! no they have changing rooms where they rent the water crafts. Let's go there to change, okay. Okay let's get going." B'Elanna jumped up from the blanket grabbing her swim gear and heading off to the changing room.
Seven looked at the retreating form of her friend with curiosity. She wondered why B'Elanna was so anxious to go to the changing rooms when they could have changed right where they were. She had seen her nude form before when she was in sickbay assisting the Doctor in performing repairs to her Borg circuitry. She assumed that maybe there was a social interaction protocol that she was unaware of and followed her to the changing rooms.
After they both had changed into their swim gear they decided to rent a watercraft and go for a swim afterward. They wanted or B'Elanna wanted to fill most of their time with activities to alleviate any awkwardness between them.
"So you want to take a spin around the lake or go for a swim first?" said B'Elanna almost too eagerly.
Thinking for a moment, Seven answered, "I believe I would prefer to go for a boat ride. I think that would give us an opportunity to talk."
The half Klingon felt all the air rush from her lungs and her mouth gape open. After a few long moments she regained her ability speak. All she could say was "sure." She mentally kicked herself after all she did ask her what she wanted to do. She was really hoping to avoid talking about anything serious as she feared was the intention of the young blonde. It wasn't that she didn't want to talk to her but was afraid that she may expose too much about her feelings and couldn't bear to not have them returned.
They were able to rent a medium size craft with a small propulsion system. Once they got the craft into the water, they settled in to take a leisurely ride. B'Elanna dragged her hand in the water looking off the side of the craft at the ripples being caused by the motion of the craft. She purposely didn't look at the craft's other passenger because she didn't want to give the idea that she wanted to talk. But she should have known that wouldn't stop her if she was determined to do something.
Both women spoke at the same time. B'Elanna was still looking in the water when she called Seven's name but turned her head to look at her when she heard her name called.
"Go ahead Seven. What did you want to say?" B'Elanna was glad that she gave Seven the go ahead to speak first because she wasn't sure what she was going to say to her. Of course now she was going to have to answer whatever question the young blonde was going to ask her.
Seven nodded and began to speak. "You appear to be uncomfortable in my presence. Have I done something to cause you to change your behavior toward me?"
'Well here we go. It's time to put up or shut up. Kah'less, how do I tell her that the only thing she's done is be kind, caring and gorgeous as hell?'
"Seven, I'm sorry that I made you feel that way. I didn't mean to. I have enjoyed being with you. You have been the brightest part of my time on this planet." B'Elanna had completely turned around to look at the young woman who was also steering the watercraft as she looked intently back at her.
"I am happy to be with you as well but you still have not explained your behavior towards me." Seven gazed at B'Elanna with a hint of sadness in her eyes.
B'Elanna lowered her eyes after seeing the look in Seven's eyes. She realized it was only fair to tell her how she felt even if her feelings were not reciprocated by the young woman. But she knew she didn't want to have this conversation in the middle of the lake in case things went badly.
"Seven do you mind if we go back to our blanket and finish talking there. I promise to tell you everything." B'Elanna volunteered to take over steering the watercraft but Seven declined. The short ride to the shore was done in silence as well as the walk back to their blanket.
Once back at their blanket, the two women moved awkwardly around each other until they were able to settle on the blanket.
"You want something to eat or drink?" Seven raised her ocular implant as she looked at the dark woman in her obvious attempt to stall before she began. "I guess not." B'Elanna sighed loudly as she bowed her head trying to gather her nerve to continue.
"Seven I like you a lot. The more time that we spend together, the more it hurts because of my feelings for you."
Seven became distressed at hearing this. She immediately felt unsure of the situation after hearing B'Elanna describe her feeling as painful. She stood and turned as if she was preparing to leave, "I understand."
Confusion and then understanding flashed cross B'Elanna's face. She jumped up and grabbed Seven's arm to keep her from leaving. "Wait, you don't understand. You are not hurting me Seven, my feelings for you hurt me." Seven tried to pull away again. "No that's not what I meant to say. Don't walk away, please let me try to explain. Seven I um I think I love you. No, I know I love you."
Both women looked intently into each other's eyes for several moments with Seven not fully facing her. B'Elanna turned Seven so she was standing directly in front of her.
B'Elanna reached up to caress Seven's smooth cheek as she smiled into her blue eyes. She wanted to say something more to her but was afraid of saying the wrong thing again. She also didn't want to resort to what she would normally do when words failed her, she spoke with her body. She felt in her hearts she could have something real with this woman, truly love this woman. For that reason, she didn't want to cheapen what could be a meaningful relationship with sex. But as she looked at those full lips and deep blue eyes, her resolve started to falter. The intensity of those deep blue eyes, red full lips and the compassion that radiated from this beautiful creature drew B'Elanna in. Before she had time to think she captured those lips with her own. Seven did not appear surprised but began to deepen the kiss leaning into it with purpose. Each woman's hands traveled up and down the body of the other until they found the perfect spot to rest. B'Elanna used her tongue to beg for entrance to explore that beautiful mouth to relish in all its pleasures. Her hearts sang when she was granted access as she tasted the sweetness that was the woman she was to falling for. Seven tentatively began her own journey with her tongue growing in confidence to the delight of B'Elanna. After several intoxicating minutes they were reluctantly forced apart due to the need for air. B'Elanna rested her forehead on her chin and breathed in the sweet aroma of the young woman in her arms.
Not looking up B'Elanna softly said, "I don't know what this is but I don't want to spoil it, spoil us."
"I do not understand what you mean by this?" Seven said speaking to the top of her dark hair.
B'Elanna pulled herself away from Seven so she could look into face. Seven turned her head to avoid the intense stare of the half-Klingon. B'Elanna turned her chin to make the blonde look at her, "Seven tell me, what do you feel for me?"
Waiting for Seven to respond, B'Elanna thought she would explode with anticipation or from holding her breath.
"B'Elanna, I am unsure what to call these feelings I have been experiencing. I find myself thinking about you at random times when you are not around. I find myself concerned about your welfare. When I left without you the other day from the holocenter, all I could think about is needing to be with you to feel better. I am not sure if this is love."
Pulling the tall woman towards her in a deep embrace, B'Elanna leaned into her ear and whispered, "That sounds like love to me and I love you too Seven of Nine." She then took her face in her hands and tenderly kissed the woman again.
Seven was happy that it was confirmed what she had been feeling had in fact been love. She had feared that she was incapable of feeling and expressing love. Her whole purpose for participating in the holoexperience was to re-experience love but when she became angry at her parents she felt she was incapable of love. But now knowing that B'Elanna felt love for her and confirming that what she was feeling was in fact love, she knew that she was on her way to achieving the humanity she had sought.
They spent the next few hours talking, playing in the lake and enjoying each other's company.
As they did in the square while buying the food, they would often feed each other the food that they had bought, at times playfully teasing each other. There were times when B'Elanna would capture the long slender fingers of Seven's in her mouth and lick each finger slowly then would suck each digit as if she were making love to each one individually making sure each one received special attention. The times that she had the fingers of Seven's Borg enhanced hand in her mouth, the young blonde would emit such sounds of pleasure that it took all of B'Elanna's resolve to repress the growl that was growing from her core. The intensity of her feelings could only be quenched by recapturing her lips in another round of erotic kisses.
Seven found the need to break away from the powerful feelings that she was experiencing for fear that she would explode. She found herself desiring more from B'Elanna but did not want to disappoint her. She had researched thoroughly the romantic rituals of both heterosexual and homosexual relationships but believed what she was experiencing with this woman left her research sorely lacking.
"Seven, what's wrong? Are you okay?" B'Elanna whispered as she softly caressed her arm.
"I am unsure. Would you mind if we go back to our room now?" she responded with a shaky voice.
Becoming concerned, B'Elanna sat up and looked intently at Seven. "Did I do something to make you feel uncomfortable?"
"No." She caressed the light brown arm softly as she attempted to explain. "I am feeling somewhat overwhelmed by what I am feeling. I did not expect to feel such powerful emotions for you." She noticed the worried look on B'Elanna's face and continued to clarify what she meant. "I am happy that I have feelings for you but I need time to adjust and learn how to manage them. When you touch me, my skin feels as if an electrical current is running through my body and I want you to continue to touch me but I am not sure how to handle those emotions. Do you think I will become accustom to these feelings?"
B'Elanna gave her a bright smile and lifted her hand to her lips and kissed it tenderly. "I hope you will always feel electricity every time we touch. I feel it too." She kissed the palm of her hand and placed it on her chest so that Seven could feel her hearts beating. "We can take things slow until you feel you are better able to handle your emotions." 'I may have to take a bunch of cold showers in the meantime.'
"Does that mean we will not engage in kissing and feeding each other? I enjoyed when you kissed my fingers."
As a way of an answer, B'Elanna took the hand she was holding and placed the middle finger in her mouth and lightly sucked. "Does this answer your question?" Seven moaned deeply as B'Elanna continued to run her tongue and lips over her fingers. B'Elanna knew she should not continue this action much longer or she would have to jump into the lake. She also realized they were both still in the swim suits and needed to change before they went back to their room. Having that much of Seven's skin showing was doing nothing for her self control.
Although they had eaten at the lake, nibbled was more like it, they stopped at a restaurant and had a casual meal. In reality, B'Elanna was nervous about being alone with Seven in their room. While they ate they held hands, talked about how they felt about each other and what they wanted from their relationship to be. They stared longingly into each other's eyes seeing the anticipation of their future and the fire of their passion for each other.
B'Elanna could not look at the blonde any longer without touching her. She would honor her promise to wait until Seven was ready to take their relationship deeper but until that time, the dark woman would be content just to hold and kiss her. She gestured to Seven that she was ready to leave and go back to their room. They left the restaurant never releasing each other's hands and walked back to their room with radiant smiles on each of their faces.
Once back at their room, the couple moved about each other with a great deal anxiety like two teenagers involved in an awkward dance despite how connected they were earlier. The fire of desire overtook Seven and she quickly moved behind B'Elanna twirling her around to face her as she pushed her against the wall and passionately took her lips and kissed her soundly. A growl was coming from deep within B'Elanna that was soon joined by the sensuous moans from Seven.
The more Seven kissed B'Elanna, the more her feelings were becoming more comfortable as she felt herself melting into the embrace of her Klingon love. She knew that the progression of a romantic relationship usually ended with a sexual act and she longed that she and her new love would get to that point soon. But until that point, she was content to just be with her in any way she could.
B'Elanna gently pushed away from Seven knowing that if she didn't stop now she would never be able to stop until she consumed this woman completely in her arms.
"Seven love " B'Elanna said breathlessly, "can we lie down, maybe on the bed? I want to hold you, feel you against me, wake up with you in my arms. Can you we do that?"
The tall blonde looked deep into B'Elanna's brown eyes and smiled brightly at hearing herself referred to as 'love'. "I would enjoy that," was all of her reply as they moved to the bedroom.
Before they lay in the bed, B'Elanna reached up and released the long blonde hair from its bun that Seven put it in after they returned from the lake. Her hair cascaded down over her shoulders framing her face and accentuated her blue eyes. As she ran her fingers through her hair, Seven leaned into the touch. B'Elanna brought her head down so she could kiss Seven once more.
B'Elanna crawled into bed lifting the sheet and reaching out her hand inviting Seven to join her. Seven gracefully slid in next to the dark woman where she took the blonde into her arms where she pulled her into a tight embrace. The warmth of their affection for each other radiated between them as they relaxed into the growing love that they both shared. As the morning sun crept into the room neither woman was in rush to leave the room, for that matter neither was in a hurry to leave the bed.
The mood on Voyager had greatly improved since the crew left the planet. Janeway sat on the bridge secretly trying to contain her own giddy feeling of contentment at being more relaxed that she had felt since leaving the Alpha quadrant. She looked around at her bridge crew, pleased at the renewed commitment they all appeared to share to reach the Alpha quadrant.
B'Elanna was buzzing around Engineering checking on the various projects that she had assigned to her team. Everyone noticed the almost whimsical mood of their fearless leader, for some it was almost frightening to have the Klingon Engineer in such a good mood and tossing around compliments like they were penny candy.
When she was satisfied of the work of her team, she went into her office to prepare her report for tomorrow's senior staff meeting. She was happy that for the last three weeks since leaving the planet, there were no emergencies, hostile attacks or mechanical malfunctions to the engines. She was almost bored. While she was compiling the needed information for her report, she came across a PADD that she didn't remember placing on her desk.
She picked up the PADD and recognized immediately who had placed in on her desk. A wide smile came across her face. As she read what was on the PADD she had to cover mouth to keep from laughing out loud as she looked at a picture of her and Seven of Nine playing beach volleyball on their first day on Planet Questa. What she saw next caused her to melt in her seat.
In the darkness of the night,
Take my hand and lead the way;
tell me all you want to say.
Whisper softly in my ear,
all those things I want to hear.
Kiss my lips and touch my skin;
bring out passions deep within.
Pull me close and hold me near;
take away my pain and fear.
be my beacon, shine your light.
In the brightness of the sun,
show me that you are the one.
Give me wings so I can fly;
for I can soar when you're nearby.
Enter my heart, break down the wall,
it's time for me to watch it fall.
I've been a prisoner, can't you see?
Break my chains and set me free.
Strip me of my armor tight;
you'll find I won't put up a fight.
Release my soul held deep within . . .
I'm ready now, let love begin.
Ready For Love
Memories of their last night on the planet came rushing back along with the intense desire she felt for her beautiful lover. The feel of her hair, the softness of her skin and the sweet scent of her body threatened to send B'Elanna over into an abyss of pure ecstasy. Although they only held and kissed each other, it would always be remembered as the first of many magical nights that they would share together.
At the end of the message, Seven left a personalized directive:
Meet me in Holodeck 2 at 2000. Wear the black leather pants with the red blouse.
B'Elanna did not know what her lover had in mind but she wasn't sure if she could wait that long. She was glad that she had finished her report because she knew that she wouldn't have been able to concentrate after reading Seven's words of love and the request for her presence in the Holodeck. She looked at her chronometer 1730. She groaned loudly. She had enough time to get Carrey to cover the rest of her shift, go to her quarters, change clothes and get to the Holodeck by 1945.
B'Elanna stood outside the Holodeck a Klingon display of nerves pacing back and forth. At exactly 2000 the doors to the Holodeck opened and B'Elanna walked in. She quickly recognized the dance club that she and Seven went to on their first date. From the side of the room, Seven walked out wearing the same red dress that she wore that same night. She wasn't sure if it was possible but B'Elanna thought she looked more beautiful than she did that night.
"Love, would you honor me by joining me for a date of dancing and dinner?" Seven lovingly asked as she reached her hand toward the short woman.
B'Elanna took the hand offered to her and walked toward her heavenly vision in red and was enveloped into the long arms of her lover as they danced, thankful that they were the only ones in the room not that they would have noticed if the room was full of people.
"Thank you for loving me and allowing me to love you." She nestled her head on the shoulder of the woman she knew would someday be her wife and sent out a vow to Kahless that she would never live her life in the past but always look to the future. Seven bent down and kissed her and mouthed the words 'You are welcome.'
The two women danced on into the night holding each other as if they were the last two people alive.
B'Elanna didn't discover until later that Seven had used a week's worth of rations so they could have the Holodeck to themselves for the whole evening.
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