DISCLAIMER: CSI Miami and its characters are the property of Jerry Bruckheimer and CBS. No infringement intended.
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.
Questions
By sinjenkai
Part 17
With the help of the pain relievers, Natalia was able to sleep through the night, but during the early morning, they began to wear off and images began to invade her dreams.
She was back in the room that he had held her in, but this time it was dark save for a dangling light bulb that was swinging to and fro. She was once again strapped down to the chair and could only listen as Jethro's voice taunted her while his face was alternately in the light and in the shadows.
"You gave me so much pleasure during our time together. I do so hope that Ms. Duquesne will bring me just as much. I promise to treat her with as much care as I did you and all the others. By the time that I'm finished with her, she will hate and loathe you just as much as she loves you now."
"Nooo! Stay away from her." Natalia sat up, screaming.
Calleigh ran from the bathroom where she was brushing her teeth and gathered the shaking woman in her arms.
"Talia, what's the matter?"
"He's not dead. He's going to come and hurt you. I heard him yesterday."
Gently taking Natalia face between in her hands, Calleigh softly explained again.
"That wasn't Jethro baby. That was his brother, Jacob. Jethro is in the morgue."
"I need to see his body. I want to see both him and his brother in the same room. Cal, I know in my head that he's dead, but I have to see for myself."
"I'll fix it somehow, I promise. He can't hurt us any more, baby."
Natalia slowly pulled away so that she could see Calleigh's face. She was afraid that she would see disappointment in her wife's face, but all she saw was love with a bit of worry mixed in. Leaning forward she gently ran her tongue over Calleigh's lower lip, drawing out a slight sigh.
Holding very still, Calleigh let Natalia explore her lips, knowing that she needed to take control of something, anything.
Natalia moaned softly as Calleigh parted her lips and allowed her access into the warmth of her mouth. Threading her fingers in golden hair, Natalia deepened the kiss and pulled Calleigh towards her as she leaned back.
"Look at me Calleigh. Let me see your eyes."
A sound from outside of the room broke Natalia's concentration and she looked over Calleigh's shoulder in a slight state of shock in what she was doing. Her eyes widen when she actually realized that someone may have walked in on them and would have gotten an eyeful. Turning back to Calleigh, Natalia softly asked.
"Why were you letting me do that?"
Looking at her wife, Calleigh whispered.
"Because you needed to be in control of something and it was something that I could give you. I knew that you would stop before it went too far and my back is to the door, but…"
Calleigh smiled sweetly as she leaned forward to brush her lips against Natalia's, then gently murmured.
"I needed you to touch me too. I wanted to feel your hands on me."
Raising an eyebrow, Natalia smirked.
"If it had gone on just a bit longer, you would have felt more than my hands."
Swallowing audibly, Calleigh leaned back as she buttoned up her shirt. Never taking her eyes off Natalia's, she back leaned down to capture her lips in a hard, needy kiss that left them both breathless. Finally giving them room to breathe, Calleigh agreed.
"So would you."
"Mmm, something to look forward to."
"Do you want some breakfast? I can go down to the cafeteria and get you something if you can't wait for them to bring something up."
"I need to start doing this on my own, but please don't leave."
When she finally made it back to the bed, she was sweating and in pain, but she was reluctant to take any medication because she really did not want to go back to sleep as she might dream.
Calleigh helped her lay back and gently pushed the damp hair away from her forehead before placing a gentle kiss on Natalia's lips.
"Will you be alright if I go talk with the doctor about getting you out today? I'll also contact Alexx so that you can go to the morgue."
"Darlin', with everything that we've been through, positive proof is not asking too much. Let me go take care of everything and I'll be back as soon as possible."
The national news was nothing out of the ordinary with entertainment, stocks and governmental issues, but when the local news Natalia felt like the breath was sucked out of her lungs. A picture of Jethro flashed on the screen along with the story that he was a serial killer that may have killed close to a hundred women and had been responsible for the deaths of the CSI's that were in town for the symposium. The station showed pictures of the three women and then mentioned the investigation that was going on in regards of him working for the MDPD.
Turning off the television, Natalia lay there in silence, trying to slow down the thoughts racing through her mind.
'Why didn't he kill me? Why was I the one who got away?
Placing her hands over her face, Natalia tried to block out the images of the young women that had died because they looked like her and when her fingers touched the wound on her head, she flinched.
'Damn it! How many lives has Jethro destroyed?'
Slowly, Calleigh opened the door and looked in to see Natalia lying with her eyes closed. She quietly went in and stood beside the bed, watching the slow rise and fall of Natalia's breathing. The doctor had okayed her release, and they could leave as soon as Eric arrived to pick them up. She had talked with the doctor in the hallway, received the instructions for Natalia's care, and had arranged for her medication to be ready to pick up downstairs at the pharmacy when they left. She had also arranged for Horatio to pickup them up early evening to go to the morgue.
"Hey babe, you want kick this joint?" Calleigh softly asked.
Natalia's eyes flew open.
"You mean that I can leave?"
"Can I get a set of scrubs to wear home?"
Calleigh called Eric and found out that he was on the way so they checked out and went downstairs to meet him.
He pulled up to the curb in one of the Hummers, quickly jumping out and coming around to help Natalia in. Opening up the front passenger door, he turned and gently picked her up, then placed her on the seat.
"I didn't hurt you, did I?"
The ride was uneventful and they were soon pulling into the drive of Natalia's home. Calleigh quickly got out and unlocked the front door as Eric carried Natalia inside.
"Where do you want to be? In the living room or in the bedroom, babe"
"I think that the bedroom, that way I can help you pick out stuff to pack. And if I want to get up, we do have the wheelchair."
"Before I go, I just wanted to tell you both that I'm happy that you've got each other and I hope that you will be very happy."
"Thank you Eric. We're glad that you're ok with us."
When Calleigh walked back into the bedroom, Natalia was looking around.
"Where is my other pillow,"
"I was hugging it while you were gone and left it in there."
Placing the pillow behind Natalia's back, Calleigh then went to get a couple of suitcases so that she could start packing. Placing one of the cases on the bed, she started packing as Natalia suggested items. Natalia asked her to get shorts, tank tops and t-shirts. A couple of bathing suits, skirts and blouses along with some loose fitting slacks were neatly folded and packed in. Then Calleigh packed her own clothes and put the cases next to the front door.
On the way back to the bedroom, Calleigh detoured to the kitchen to get them both something to drink. She walked into the bedroom sipping from a glass of juice. Handing the other glass to Natalia, she went around to the other side of the bed and crawled over to sit cross-legged next to
her wife.
"How are you feelin' darlin? Glad to be home?"
"Yes. If we don't see that hospital again in our lifetime, it will be too soon. What time is Horatio coming to pick us up?"
"He said that he would be here around seven, so if you want to take a nap, go right ahead. Do you need your medicine?"
"There is nowhere else I'd rather be."
"Come here baby, I need to touch you."
"I just don't want to hurt you."
"Well then, I'm available for all the feeling you need."
"You're easy huh? Well, it had only better be with just me because you are the one thing that I don't share."
"Talia...babe. Wake up. Horatio will be here soon and we need to get dressed."
Slowly opening her eyes, Natalia looked at Calleigh for a moment before reaching over and pulling her over for a kiss. The kiss was hard and hungry, making Calleigh moan against Natalia's lips.
Pulling away, Calleigh straddled her wife; taking great care that she didn't put pressure on her legs, then leaned over and placed her hands on either side of Natalia's head. Dark hooded green eyes stared down at Natalia, whose own eyes were dark with passion.
"Do you still need to feel me?"
Instead of answering, Natalia reached down, and pulled open Calleigh's shirt; scattering buttons across the room, then with a flick of her wrist, unhook the front clasp of her bra. Sliding her hands inside the opened clothing, Natalia cupped Calleigh's breasts. Looking up at her wife, Natalia used one hand to tug on her pants.
"Take 'em off." Calleigh moved over, took off the opened clothing, her pants and the piece of black silk underneath, and then returned to the same position.
"Move up higher baby.... Up this way... A bit more... Perfect."
Natalia continued to tease the breast with her fingers, but instead of using her lips, she watched Calleigh's face. The expressions that flitted across were wondrous to watch and with each thrust, Natalia could tell that she was getting closer and closer to the edge.
"I want to taste you now."
The words were barely out of Natalia's mouth before Calleigh repositioned herself above her lips and uttering a cry as her clit was being suckled. Keeping in time with her own heart rate, Natalia licked and thrust to the ever-increasing beat, getting her wife closer and closer to the edge. Then she added the fourth finger and began to hum. That was all it took as Calleigh's muscles began to spasm, and a moan that seemed to come from the bottom of her soul erupted. A moan that actually sent Natalia over the edge with the intensity that she felt. Twisting her tongue across the throbbing clit brought another wave of spasms and a higher pitch keen from her wife who was leaning against the headboard, trying to keep her balance.
A final wave crested and Calleigh collapsed over on her side next to Natalia. Without taking a moment to catch her breath, she slowly rose up to kiss Natalia, moaning, as she tasted herself on her wife's lips and tongue.
"Mmm, that was...I can't even put it into words...Just, thank you darlin'"
"Thank you babe, I needed you so badly that it hurt. I can't explain it."
"You don't have to explain it, I understand. It's as if you need to feel out of control to actually feel in control. It's like your body and emotions are conflicting with each other and you have to reset everything to feel right."
"Well, I think that it's because we have found our other half, the person that we're supposed to be with. And sometimes we need to feel each other in every way possible to each feel complete."
"I like the sound of that. And I do so love feeling you in every way possible."
"Shit, darlin', Horatio is going to be here in fifteen minutes and we need to get dressed. Let's wash up real quick, and then I'll help you get dressed."
They were making their way to the living room when the doorbell rang. Calleigh went over to the door, let Horatio in, and went back to Natalia to ask her a question.
"Do you want to take a pill before we go or wait until later?"
"How about if I take half of one now. I don't want to be too groggy when I meet Jethro's brother, but I don't want to be in a lot of pain either."
Dusk had fallen by the time that they arrived and Calleigh asked Horatio to pull up to the back entrance, as it would be easier for them with the wheelchair. They made their way into the morgue without running into anyone and were soon pushing open the swinging doors.
Alexx was walking out of her office when they came in and she smiled as she caught sight of them.
"Well, look who's here? Girl, you're looking good."
"Thanks, I'm feelin ok right now. Is Jethro's brother here yet?"
Alexx looked at Natalia once more, then gave Calleigh an almost imperceptible nod before she opened the door and pulled out the drawer. Grasping the white linen she slowly drew it up to reveal Jethro's body and even though Natalia thought that she was prepared for the sight, she still gasped. Calleigh placed a comforting hand on her back and took a step closer.
Natalia looked down at the remains of the man who had caused so much pain to so many people and as much as she wanted to feel remorse, all she felt was anger. There were three bullet wounds in his chest along with Alexx's autopsy cuts and one smaller knife wound on his left side. She stared at him a long time before she whispered.
"He would have never stopped if they hadn't shot him. He would have killed me and gone after Calleigh."
"That's not true, baby girl. When you stabbed him, it was near his arterial artery and when he pulled out the scalpel, he nicked it. He would have bled to death in a couple of hours. So in a sense, he killed himself."
"No, I would have killed him before the night was out or died trying because there was no way that I was going to let him near Calleigh. And I know that I should feel bad about that, but I don't."
She turned around and almost passed out by the sight of Jethro's twin standing in front of her. He, in turn, looked quite surprised when he saw her face.
Both Calleigh and Horatio realized at the same time that they had neglected to tell her that Jethro had a twin.
"Miss Boa Vista, I'm Jacob Thomas and I would like to offer my apologies for what my brother put you through. I realize in saying that it doesn't even come close to covering it, but at seeing you, I can almost understand why he did it."
Reaching in to his inner jacket pocket, Jacob withdrew a photograph and handed it to Natalia.
"This is a picture of Jethro, his wife Anna and their son, about four months before their accident."
"I believe that since they were arguing at the time of the accident and it was never resolved, Jethro felt that he had to punish someone for Anna's supposed infidelity and it ended being all the women and you. That's the only thing that I can think of."
"I am sorry for your loss, no one should lose a family member in that way, but I am honestly not sorry that he is dead. And I also hope that you understand if I hope that we never meet again."
"Is it alright if I use your office for a bit?"
Crossing over to her wife, Calleigh stood next to her, taking her hand within her grasp. They stood there in silence until Natalia finally asked.
"I wasn't rude, was I?"
Kissing the top of the caramel colored head, Calleigh asked.
"Will you be ok in here for a minute or two alone? I need to go talk with Horatio about tomorrow."
She was about to go look for them when she changed her mind and instead went to open the drawer that held Jethro's body, pulled it out and uncovered his face.
She stared at him a long time before she quietly said, "I'm glad that you're dead, you son of a bitch. I'm just sorry I wasn't the one who killed you. It would have been a thousand times worse than what you put my wife through and I would have enjoyed it twice just as much. No one hurts Natalia and gets away scot free, no one."
She stood there with her hands clenching and unclenching, as her thoughts were whirling through her mind. The longer that she stood there, the madder she got and started to shake.
"The physical pain that you put my wife through was bad enough, but what you did to her mind can never be forgiven. I just hope that there is a special place in hell for people like you and you get everything that you deserve and then some."
Walking over to him, she placed a hand on his arm and asked.
"What time does the plane leave in the morning?"
"The graveside service starts at eleven so the plane will leave at nine. The flight isn't that long and there will be a car waiting at the airport with a driver, so you won't have to try to find the location. As soon as the service is over, you'll be driven back to the airport and flown down to the Keys where another car will be waiting to drive you to the cabin."
Squeezing his arm, Calleigh looked up at her most trusted friend with gratitude.
"I don't know what we would have done without you. You have been here for us since the beginning and we are very grateful."
Ducking his head, Horatio gave his trademark smile and simply stated.
"It's what family does, they stand by each other. Now let's get your wife home."
Calleigh grabbed the wheelchair and headed towards Alexx's office to get Natalia, only to find her coming out of the door towards her.
"You ready to go home, darlin'?"
"Would you like to go to get something to eat, or just go home and fix a sandwich or something?"
Finally, she was able to whisper. "Would you mind terribly if we went home and just had something delivered? I really don't feel like being around people right now."
Alexx walked up and placed her hand on Natalia's shoulder.
"I know that today was hard for you, but I just want to let you know that I understand why you did this and I hope that now; things will be easier for you. You call me if you need anything at all and I'll be right there."
"Thank you again Alexx. I don't know what we would do without you."
Leaning down to give Natalia a quick hug, Alexx whispered.
"You'll never have to find out."
Calleigh gave the dark woman a hug and they then made their way back out to the Hummer, and then headed back home.
Horatio got Natalia inside and comfortable on the sofa before he turned to leave. Seeing the suitcases next to the door, he told Calleigh that he would go ahead and take them right then so they wouldn't have to worry about them in the morning. Wishing the two young women good evening, he bid them good night.
Closing the door, Calleigh turned to look at her wife who was resting her head on the arm of the sofa while looking outside into the back yard. Natalia had been silent on the ride back, just looking out the window at the scenery as it zoomed by and that worried Calleigh. Quietly walking over, she placed a gentle kiss on the tip of Natalia's nose.
"I'm gonna order Chinese, if that's all right with you. Is there anything special that you would like?"
Natalia shook her head no and answered.
"Whatever you get is fine for me. I probably won't eat too much."
"Are you in pain darlin'? I'll go get your medicine."
Reaching up to grab Calleigh's hand, Natalia pulled her down so that she was kneeling next to her. Once again, she had a hard time meeting her eyes, but this time she stared at their joined hands.
"No, I'm not in any pain. I'm a little uncomfortable, but nothing bad. I'm just not very hungry, but I will eat a little something. How about getting those little dumplings that I like with the sweet and sour sauce?"
"Will do. Just give me a few minutes and I'll be right back. Did you want to change clothes? I'll bring them in here so you won't have to move around too much later."
Natalia agreed and while Calleigh was in the bedroom changing and ordering dinner, she returned to staring out into the dark. She couldn't believe the emotions that she had felt when she looked down at Jethro's body; fear and hate, but strangely enough, no pity. She didn't feel sorry in the least that that man was dead and that bothered her. She knew that she wasn't a hard-hearted woman, but other than the first two emotions, there was nothing else. Closing her eyes, she laid an arm over her face, but winced as it hit the gash on her forehead. Swearing quietly, she tried to sit up a bit to make herself more comfortable, but gave up when the movement tugged on her legs. Crossing her arms on her chest, she just stared outside until Calleigh returned.
Bringing a pair of shorts and a tank top, Calleigh helped Natalia to stand and then removed her pants and slid on the shorts for her, then made sure that she didn't lose her balance as she got out of her blouse and bra, then put on the tank. After helping her back down onto the sofa, Calleigh went into the kitchen to get them some iced tea, utensils and napkins so that they could start eating as soon as the food got there.
After putting on some easy jazz, Calleigh sat at the end of the sofa near Natalia's feet, picked up some lotion that she had brought out and started to massage her feet. At the first touch, Natalia groaned and leaned her head back in pure bliss.
"I'll give you two hours to stop that."
"Not a problem, babe. I'm all yours for the rest of your life."
Keeping her eyes closed, Natalia quipped.
"Sold to the only bidder, me."
Laughing quietly, Calleigh just kept massaging until she heard the doorbell, then she quickly got up and paid for the food. By the time that she got back, Natalia was softly snoring so Calleigh placed the food on the kitchen counter, fixed herself a small plate and ate. After cleaning up, she sat on the floor, leaning against the sofa and listen to the music for while before she too drifted off to sleep.
The room was dark save for the light that was coming in through the sliding doors when Natalia awoke. Raising her head, she looked around, but didn't see Calleigh anywhere. Slowly she sat up and started to swing her legs to the floor when she saw Calleigh asleep next to the sofa. Carefully maneuvering her body, Natalia scooted down until she could put her feet on the floor. Then very slowly, she stood up, stretched her back and then looked down at her sleeping wife.
She looked so peaceful and so very young as she slept. Natalia had watched her through the window in Alexx's office when she had gone over to Jethro's body and wonder what Calleigh had said. She knew that Calleigh still felt responsible for what had happened because she couldn't protect her. Natalia didn't blame her at all, in fact, she was glad that Calleigh hadn't been there that day because she believed that Jethro would have either tortured or killed her if she had been.
Quietly, she made her way to the bathroom and took care of her needs, and then she headed back out to the kitchen. On her way however, she stubbed her toe, falling to her knees with a cry.
"Talia!"
When she walked in the room, Calleigh saw that Natalia was wiping away some tears. Quickly she put down the tray and sat beside her wife.
Natalia looked puzzled.
"What do you mean, what you felt? You never let on that you felt that way."
Calleigh shook her head as she tried to explain.
"I can't or I should say, I couldn't. For so long, I've had to hide my emotions, my fears… keep everything locked away, hidden because I've wanted to be good at my job. I couldn't let anything get in the way of being 'Bullet Girl'. So I learn to compartmentalize everything. Then here you come and everything changes, just a little at first, but slowly I saw cracks forming in my walls. I couldn't help but notice how I felt when I was around you, how I looked forward to our paths crossing during the day. After that, I go and get myself shot, ending up here and in your bed, where I finally feel like I belong. However, I still have to hide my feelings, even though I want to shout it from the rooftops that I've fallen in love. And it's hard, even with you, to show you my emotions, because somewhere down deep, I'm scared that if I show them that they will scare you away."
Letting go of Calleigh's hand, Natalia carefully cupped her face and looked her in the eyes. She gazed into the green depths for so long without saying anything that Calleigh began to feel that she was looking into her soul.
Quietly Natalia murmured. "There is nothing that you can tell me that will scare me away. I know that we both have times in our pasts where we have done something that we may not be so proud of, but that's just it, in our pasts. The anger, fear, disgust, sadness, frustration, relief, happiness – all of that can be controlled, be put away, but that will just leave us as a shell of a person. And you're not a shell; you're a red blooded, Southern woman who loves life and who happens to be in love with me. So talk to me, tell me your fears when you have them. I'll try and do the same, but like you, I have my own fears."
Leaning forward, Calleigh placed a gentle kiss on Natalia's lips. "You are so wise and so very good for me. I know for a fact that I wasn't truly living until you came into my life and even with everything that has happened, I wouldn't change where I am right this minute. This is where I am supposed to be and I'm with the person that I'm supposed to be with. So there. Now would you like to eat your very late dinner and get back to sleep because tomorrow is going to be a very long day."
"Can I have the other half of the pill that I took earlier? I don't want to start depending on the medicine any more than I have to."