DISCLAIMER: Star Trek is the property of Paramount, no infringement intended.
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.

Why Here?
By ralst


Yes, Captain.

Why are you here?

Here? Do you mean this ship or something more esoteric?

No, I mean my bedroom.

Oh, here. It seemed logical.

Logical? In what universe would you turning up unannounced and scarcely clothed in my bedroom be logical?

There is no need to shout, Captain, my hearing is not impaired.

What are you doing here?!?

Perhaps I erred in my judgement. I did not realise you would become so unhinged at my presence.

I am not unhinged! <pause> I just don't relish the idea of being cut into a thousand pieces and turned into an entree.


B'Elanna will kill me!

Please, Captain, there is no need to weep. I assure you, B'Elanna need never know of our assignation.


Please, Captain, I don't think hiding under the covers and calling out to ancient deities is going to help.

She's going to boil me in oil.

Really, Captain.

No, forget that, she'll drug me and marry me off to Chakotay in some weird Marquis ceremony that doesn't allow divorce or denying conjugal visits.

Please, Captain, B'Elanna is not a monster!

Years of mind-numbing boredom and disinfecting splinters -- I can't do it Seven, I just can't!

It really isn't dignified for a captain to blubber so. Pull yourself together Kathryn, B'Elanna is not going to hurt you. I promise.

You do?

I do.

Then do you mind telling me exactly why you're here? And none of that logical malarkey.

It is simple. B'Elanna and I were playing strip hide and seek, and she knows that the last place in the quadrant I'd willingly go, is your bedroom. See, perfectly logical.



Out! Out! Out!

<sigh> Yes, Captain -- spoilsport.

The End

Return to Voyager T/7 Fiction

Return to Main Page