DISCLAIMER: Unfortunately, Showtime haven't returned my emails begging to buy the characters off them. But we could have so much fun!
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.

...because I'm an asshole
By tigerDE

"Good morning," Alice said brightly to Bette, then fell silent when she saw the look on Bette's face. Bette didn't reply and slumped in her chair, slamming her bag down on the table with such force that Alice was surprised her coffee didn't spill.

"My, you're in a bad mood," Alice commented.

"No I'm not," Bette snapped, giving her her trademark glower in an attempt to scare her off prying any further. However, Alice was probably the only person not scared of Bette and she merely looked at her, eyebrows raised in a look of disbelief.

"I'm fine," Bette insisted, picking up Alice's napkin and tearing it up into little pieces. Alice watched her thoroughly and viciously disable the enemy napkin for a moment, deciding to change the subject and let Bette get to the reason she was so pissed in her own time.

"Whatever. Did you have fun last night?"

"Have fun where?" Bette asked, too quickly and too distractedly for Alice's liking.

"With Tina? Y'know, your girlfriend?"

"She's not my girlfriend," Bette muttered darkly. "Not anymore."


"We broke up." Bette forced a fake smile on her face and looked round at the counter. "Do you want more coffee?"

Alice ignored Bette's poor attempt at changing the subject and reached her hand across the table to take Bette's. "So that's why you're in a bad mood."

"I'm not in a bad mood!" Bette shouted angrily, wrenching her hand out of Alice's. "We broke up, so what? There's plenty more fish in the sea." Bette was acting as if she didn't care, but she wouldn't make eye contact and she looked tired, as if she'd been up all night. "Do you want some more coffee? Because if…"

"Oh. My. God," Alice interrupted, peering intently at her. "You've fallen in love!"

"No I haven't," Bette said, but her voice was insincere and her face told a different story.

"Yes you have! You're in love with Tina! Bette Porter in love – I never thought I'd see the day."

"Ok, ok, I'm in love," Bette admitted, Alice's cheerfulness at the whole situation enough torture to make her give in. She looked down into the mug Marina had brought her and her voice softened as she spoke, almost to herself. "I've fallen for her. Totally, madly, deeply." There was a long pause, then Bette looked up with tears in her eyes. "Not that it matters 'cause we've broken up."

"Since when did you ever give in when there's something you want?" Alice asked in disbelief, wondering why she hadn't noticed her friend had been replaced by an impostor.

"Since we had a horrible fight, I said some things I didn't mean, and Tina left for New York for four weeks without saying goodbye."

"Oh." Alice moved to the chair next to Bette, placing a hand on her back to comfort her. "What did you fight about?"

Bette shot her a guilty look. "Nothing."

Alice stared at her until she gave in.

"There was this guy that tried to chat her up at the bar we went to last night and, even though she kept trying to get rid of him, I got jealous and angry and…" She looked down at her feet shamefully as she continued in a near whisper. "…and accused her of flirting with any penis that came along."


"I told you I didn't mean what I said." She sat back, and Alice wondered if the napkin had shown a threat of retaliation as Bette started to tear the small pieces into tiny pieces. "You know what I'm like when I lose my temper."

"Oh boy, do I," Alice agreed. "But Tina knows that too, I'm sure."

Bette's hands stopped moving as the tears finally began to fall from her eyes. "Al, when I said that she looked like she'd been slapped. The shock and hurt on her face was…"

She trailed off, remembering the way Tina had looked at her just before she turned on her heel and left.

"You're going to have to apologise," Alice said softly, pulling her in for a hug and handing her a little pile of napkin confetti to wipe her eyes.

"I can't. She won't answer her cell and she's stopped all calls to her hotel room." She gave Alice a pleading, desperate look. "What am I going to do?"

Bette flashed her thousand watt smile as the receptionist handed her her room key, leaning over the desk to give him a tantalising view of her cleavage.

"I was wondering if you could do me a favour," she purred, smiling as his eyes almost popped out of his head.

"Anything," he croaked, loosening his tie slightly.

"I'm here on business, and a colleague of mine is also staying in this hotel. She left some files that we need for our afternoon meeting in her room, and she asked me to get her spare room key so I could pick them up on my way out."

"Erm…I…I don't think I can do that," the receptionist stammered. "I'm not allowed to give out room keys without written permission."

"Oh dear," Bette said sadly, idly tracing her lips with her finger as she pretended to ponder the situation. "Oh, I know!" she exclaimed, her face visibly brightened as though an idea had just occurred to her. "If I ring her, and pass the phone to you, she could tell you that I can have the room key. I know it's not written, but she's tied up this morning, and we really need those files." She pouted slightly at the thought that she might not have those files, but looked at the man with just the right amount of hopefulness to make him agree.

"Ok, that should work," he finally gave in, and Bette rewarded him with a huge smile.

"Thank you, thank you," she gushed, reaching into her bag and pulling out her phone. Quickly she dialled Alice's number.

"Hi Tina, its me," she said brightly.

~Bette? What's going on? It's Alice.~

"Yeah, I'm just checking in," Bette told her, smiling at the receptionist all the time. "I'm trying to get your spare room key, but I can't get it without written permission from you."

~Bette, what the fuck are you talking about, you nutter?~

"Oh Tina, you're so funny," Bette laughed, fully aware of the man's stare as she played with her hair. "But we really need those files that you've left in your room for our afternoon meeting, so I'm going to have to get your room key." Out of sight of the desk Bette crossed her fingers, praying to the highest power that Alice wasn't having one of her stupid days.

~Ohhh,~ Alice breathed as the penny dropped. ~So, what do you want me to do?~

"Uh-huh, yeah, well the wonderful man behind the desk…" The receptionist beamed, and Bette had to stifle a giggle. "…has said that if you talk to him, let him know that you agree, then I can have it."

~Okay, but you owe me for this.~

"I'll pass you over now," Bette told her, handing the phone to the receptionist. She hid her smile behind her hand as he fawned over 'Tina', and it wasn't long before she was being handed another room key.

"Thank you, so much," she said to him as he handed her back her phone. "You've no idea how much this has made my day."

She picked up her hand bag and walked over to the elevators, putting an extra swing in her hips just for his benefit. When she was sure she was out of earshot, she put the phone to her ear as she started to laugh.

"Men are so gullible," she giggled, wiping tears out of her eyes.

~Oh, big boy, you've made my day…~ Alice mocked in between fits of laughter. ~So, when are you going to tell Tina that you've been confused all these years, and that you're actually straight?~

"Shut up, it worked, didn't it?! Anyway, you can't talk, you dirty bisexual." The elderly couple next to her looked shocked and moved away, making Bette laugh even more.

~You didn't seem to mind me being dirty when we were together,~ Alice shot back just as the elevator arrived.

"Ok, I'm going to have to go. I owe you a big kiss and a slap-up meal when I get back."

~Damn right you do!~ Bette stepped into the elevator, and wasn't surprised when the couple chose to wait for the next one. ~Right, go get your woman. But if you start arguing, don't be an asshole again.~

"Thanks Al, I love you too." She shut her phone, and as the elevator started to move, she gave a big sigh of relief that everything was going to plan.

Tina gave the doorman a tired smile as she walked into the hotel. After ten hours of meetings she was about ready to drop, and couldn't wait to get out of her suit and heels. She was planning on relaxing this evening; take a long, hot bath, get room service and try to catch up on her sleep.

There would be absolutely no thoughts about Bette tonight. She was sick and tired of Bette and her temper. Who gave her the right to accuse her of trying to pick up that guy the other night? She'd never given Bette any reason to doubt her, and she didn't like being accused of being a liar and a cheater. She was seriously going to have to consider whether they should still be in a relationship when she got back to LA.

As she walked through the corridor to her room, she realised she was doing exactly what she'd said she wasn't going to. She'd been thinking about Bette all day, even though she told herself not to. But that was like telling the sun not to come up, and she was angry that Bette had this much control over her.

She unlocked the door of her room and walked in, letting her briefcase fall to the floor with a loud sigh. She stepped out of her shoes, scrunching her aching toes in the soft carpet with relief.

"Eurgh," she groaned out loud, rolling her shoulders and feeling them crunch as she walked further into the room. Occupied with shrugging off her jacket, she didn't immediately notice what was in front of her, but when she looked up she jumped in surprise, her hand flying to her mouth.

In a vase on the table was the biggest bunch of flowers she'd ever seen, the huge explosion of colour making the room so much brighter than it had been when she'd left. There was no card in the flowers, but next to them was a small jewellery box and a handwritten note.

Slowly Tina approached the table and picked up the note. She knew who it was from at first glance, the soft flowing letters were instantly recognisable.

Open the box. xBx

She reached out and picked up the box, running her finger over the embossed logo on the top that could only mean one thing. Tentatively she opened it, and gasped at what was inside.

"Oh, Bette," she murmured, stroking the cool metal with her thumb. They'd been shopping one day and Tina had seen some earrings that she loved. Unfortunately they'd been in the most expensive jeweller in LA, and she couldn't afford them. But it seemed Bette could.

"I'm sorry," came a whisper from behind her, and Tina whirled round to see Bette standing in the doorway of the bathroom.

"Wha…how…?" she stuttered, her mouth dropping open.

"I flew in this morning," Bette explained. "I had to see you."

Tina took several deep breaths to calm her thumping heart, and just stared at her lover as she tried to get over the shock. Bette was clearly nervous; her shoulders were tense and she was clenching her fists over and over. She looked close to tears, and Tina felt some of her anger ebb away at the sight.

"Oh God, baby, come here," she said softly, and Bette rushed into her outstretched arms, burying her face in her neck. "Are you ok?" she asked, smoothing Bette's hair out of her eyes.

Bette didn't reply immediately, but leaned in and kissed Tina gently. "I am now," she whispered.

Tina kissed her again, but when she pulled away she stepped out of Bette's arms completely.

"I'm still very angry with you," she said in a warning tone. "So don't think that this will make me forgive you."

"I didn't think it would," Bette admitted. "But I had to see you to apologise."

"Why, Bette?" Tina asked, her voice rising as the feeling of hurt came flooding back. "Why do you think that I – in your words, not mine – 'hop into bed with every goddamn cock that comes along'?"

Bette sighed heavily and sat down on the bed. "I don't actually think that," she told her, staring at the floor.

"So why did you say it?!" Tina exclaimed. "Did you just want to hurt me? Because if you did…"

"No, T, that's not why," Bette interrupted, glancing at her briefly before returning to her study of the carpet. "I just…I was scared."


"Yeah, I was scared because I've fallen in love with you."

Tina sighed and sat on the bed next to her. "Why does that scare you?" she asked after a few moments.

"Because I've never felt like this before. Because I've never let anyone in this much and it makes me feel vulnerable. Because…" Bette took a deep breath, preparing herself to lay her insecurities bare for the first time in her adult life. "…because I'm scared that I don't mean as much to you as you do to me," she finished in a small voice.

After a long pause, Tina reached over and pulled Bette into her arms. "Baby, I've fallen in love with you too," she confessed, running a finger down her cheek. "But, I can't be with you if every time you get scared you say something like that."

"I won't, I promise," Bette gushed, her eyes shining with hopeful, unshed tears. "The last time, I swear to God."

Tina cocked her head and searched Bette's eyes to check she was being sincere. "I believe you," she whispered, bringing Bette's lips to hers in the most gentle, loving kiss they had ever shared.

It didn't stay gentle however, as the embers of the passion that always burned between them flared up, and the kiss turned incendiary. Bette kicked off her shoes and fell back onto the bed, pulling Tina on top of her so they were pressed impossibly close as they devoured each others mouth.

Soon the need to feel skin against skin became too much, and Tina sat up, pulling her camisole off and making quick work of Bette's jacket and shirt. "Oh God," she breathed, taking in the sight of Bette's flushed chest, her breasts, encapsulated in black lace, heaving with arousal.

Leaning down, she traced the line of the bra with her tongue as she reached round to unclasp it, freeing Bette's breasts to her eager mouth. She licked each nipple, then took one into her mouth and nibbled on it, pinching the other between her forefinger and thumb.

Tina was perfectly happy to work her way down her lovers body, delighting in the moans of pleasure she could bring forth from Bette, but she felt fingers tangle in her hair and pull her face up to meet Bette's.

"Together," was all Bette was able to murmur, pulling Tina's mouth to hers as they sat up. Quickly they removed the rest of their clothing and sank back into the soft bed, hands lightly caressing newly bared curves. In unison they entered each other, stroking slowly and softly, their bodies fused together, their eyes blazing with desire as they brought the other closer to climax.

Bette felt Tina's muscles begin to contract around her fingers and she knew she was there. Reaching up with her thumb she pressed Tina's clit and rubbing it in circles, rewarded by a low, guttural moan and a flood of warmth as Tina came. Not far behind her, Bette arched her back into Tina as her blood pounded in her ears and the world exploded in a flash of colour.

It was some time before either of them found the energy to move again. "Wow," was all Bette could think to say as they tried to untangle their limbs.

"Mmmm," Tina mumbled in agreement, burrowing her face into Bette's hair and inhaling the scent that was uniquely Bette Porter, comforting and painfully arousing at the same time.

"I'm sorry," Bette said after a few minutes.

Tina lifted her head from its place on Bette's shoulder and regarded her intently. "Why are you so emotionally inept?" she asked with a hint of amusement in her voice.

"Because I'm an asshole?" Bette replied, and Tina laughed. "No, seriously, you'll understand when you meet my father."

"Meeting the parents?!" Tina exclaimed in mock terror. "It's a bloody good job I love you!"

"Yeah, bloody good job," Bette repeated softly, pulling Tina in for a kiss. "And now, I'm going to show you how much of a good job it is…"

The End

Return to The L Word Fiction

Return to Main Page