DISCLAIMER: The copyrighted characters of any TV program, movie, or published work of fiction are the property of their owners/creators. No copyright infringement is intended and nothing is being made. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the author.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Feedback is greatly appreciated (especially if you like it). Single quotes indicate thoughts. Ghost did not happen in my world because it was illogical and stupid. Law and Order: Conviction did not happen in my world either. Same reason. Alex came straight back to SVU, just like she was supposed to.
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.

Children And Olivia II
By Lena Smith


Alex Cabot walked into the empty SVU bullpen and frowned. Her target was nowhere to be seen. Since there was a light on in Cragen's office, she walked up and knocked on the half open door. "Don, do you know where Detective Benson is? I've tried all her numbers and can't get ahold of her. I have some questions on the Cimijotti case."

Captain Cragen glanced down at his watch. "Well, since it's Friday night and she's not on call and it's 7:20, she'll be over at NY Presbyterian Cornell Children's Hospital. When she's there, Olivia always turns her cell off."

Alex looked at Don, concerned, "Is one of Elliot's kids sick?"

Cragen shook his head and motioned for Alex to sit down. "While you were gone in Witness Protection, Olivia tried to get pre-approved to adopt a child. You KNOW how much she loves kids."

Alex nodded, a fond smile on her face.

"The jackasses at Child Services turned her down. Said that with her work schedule, lack of a partner or a support system she wasn't a "suitable candidate for adoption"." He snarled using finger quotes.

"They WHAT?!!! That's insane! Liv would be a great mom!" Cragen swore he could literally see smoke coming out of Cabot's ears. He'd never, ever seen her this irate before, no matter how stupidly Ridenour had ruled on a case. Even her scalp was red, under that beautiful blond hair.

"Yeah. She was devastated. Of course, we didn't find out for a couple of months what had happened. You know how she is. She was just . . . . . quieter. Finally Elliot got it out of her." Cragen shook his head. "After that she started volunteering in the infant AIDS ward at the hospital. They have some abandoned babies there, so she goes in and cuddles them and reads to them. They don't have anyone else."

"Oh Liv." Alex said softly, tears trailing down her face. There was a crushing weight in her chest for the pain Olivia had gone through. 'And I wasn't here for you.'

"Alex, there was nothing you could have done at the time." Her head snapped up in surprise. Had Cragen turned into a mind reader? "When you came back last month, Olivia told me that she knew you were in WitSec. Your safety was paramount for her." He came around his desk, sat down beside Alex and took her hand. "I had tell her you died. She screamed NO and passed out. Olivia. Passed out. Then when she came to, she cried in my arms for hours. She did not do that when I told her her mother died. I'd suspected that she felt more for you than just friendship, and that confirmed it. She never discussed your relationship with me. But I noticed she was a little . . . calmer after the meeting with Hammond. I'd hoped that meant you were alive and in WitSec. But the loss of you in her life, I don't think she would ever have gotten over it. Part of the spark went out of her. But taking care of these babies has brought a little of it back."

As she wiped away the tears, Alex said, "Do you think Olivia would mind if I went over there?"

Uncharacteristically, Cragen gave her a quick hug and said, "I don't think she would mind at all."

The click of her heels echoed down the quiet halls of the huge teaching hospital. The lights were dimmed in the children's wards. Alex reached the nurse's desk in the pediatric ward and asked the petite brunette sitting there, "I'm trying to find Olivia Benson. Can you help me, please?"

A huge smile lighting her face she said, "Sure, I'm Janice. You are?"

"Alexandra Cabot."

Janice came around the desk and waved for Alex to accompany her. "Oh, so YOU'RE big Alex."

"What do you mean?"Alex replied, confusedly.

"We love Olivia here. She's done wonders for these babies. And they wrap themselves around your heart. We've got one little one, a little blond girl, that especially got to Olivia. She's got AIDS, and trisomy 18, and other complications. She's never going to leave this hospital. She's day to day as it is, really. Olivia tried to adopt her but Child Services still wouldn't let her, because of her job, because the baby "might" have a chance to be released from the hospital at some point." Janice snorted. "You'd have a better chance of a snowstorm on the sun than that happening. Judge Petrovsky was livid. They did allow Olivia to give her her name though. She's Alexandra Serena Benson."

Alex inhaled sharply, "Oh! When was this?"

"About four months ago. Olivia still holds all the babies, but little Alex is hers. Here we are."

They looked through the windows and Alex's heart caught at the most beautiful sight that she had ever seen. Olivia was sitting in a rocking chair, feeding a little blond baby, with the gentlest, tenderest smile on her face. Alex couldn't help the tears rolling down her face. "So beautiful."

"Yes, they are." Janice smiled, "Come on, let's get you gowned so you can go in there with them."

Alex washed her hands with the antiseptic scrub and Janice put a clean gown on her and tied it up and then led her into the nursery.

Softly she said, "Hi Olivia. We have someone here who'd like to see our girl."

Olivia looked up, stunned for a moment, then a wide smile came over her face. "Hi Alex. How did you know where I was?"

"Cragen told me. Are you going to introduce me to this little darling?"

"Oh, yeah!" She looked down at the baby in her arms. "Hmmm, it looks like you're about done with that bottle, little one. How about you give mamma a nice big burp and then you get to say hi to someone very special, ok?" Olivia gently took the bottle out of the baby's mouth, wiped her little face, threw the towel over her shoulder and put little Alex on her shoulder and started to pat her on the back. Suddenly there was a huge burp.

Alex laughed. "Has Uncle Fin been here teaching her bad things?"

Olivia giggled, "What was your first clue?" She took little Alex down from her shoulder. "You like Uncle Fin and Uncle Munch and Uncle Elliot and Uncle Don, don't you, sweetheart? And now, you get to meet the lovely lady you are named for. Remember I told you all about Mommy Alex? This is Mommy Alex. Alex, this is Alexandra Serena Benson."

"Mommy Alex?" Alex choked, and Olivia looked up with concern. "Oh thank you, Liv. Thank you so much." As the tears fell harder, Alex pulled up another rocking chair. "Come to Mommy, sweetheart. It's my turn to hold you." Olivia gently put little Alex in big Alex's arms. "Oh, Liv, she's gorgeous . . . . yes, you are, little girl, you are so beautiful. You just wait until Grandma Cabot sees you." Alex stroked the soft blond hair and gazed into the big blue eyes and fell totally in love with the baby in her arms. She bent down and kissed the little forehead and held her hand. "Mommy loves you, Alex. Yes, I do." She looked over at Olivia.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you about her before."

Alex grabbed Olivia's hand and cut her off. "Olivia, I've only been back three weeks. It's not like we've had a whole lot of time to talk, anyway, with me coming back to SVU and trying to get things back together, and the case load you've had. I'm still staying with Mom to ease her mind and I haven't had time to look for an apartment. Don't worry about it. I'm not upset." She looked down at little Alex and kissed her again as she smiled up at her Mommy. "And now I have a beautiful baby girl. How wonderful this life is!"

Olivia smiled and went to pick up the baby in the next crib. "This is Simon. He's one of Alex's friends. He's a good boy."

"Hi Simon. It's very nice to meet you." Alex said as she tickled his tummy. Simon giggled at her.

"Flirting with the boys, huh?" Liv raised an eyebrow.

"Sure. Gotta show our girl how to work it." Alex grinned.

Olivia groaned. "Uh huh."

They spent the next hour with the children. Big Alex put little Alex in her crib when she fell asleep and continued to watch Olivia with the others. She had thought she couldn't love Olivia any more, but seeing her interact with the babies, the love and tenderness she lavished upon them, just expanded her love a thousand fold.

Finally, all the babies were asleep and they left the nursery. Alex reached for Olivia's hand as they walked down the hall. She held it to her lips and kissed the back of it. "I know we haven't had the time to be together. But Cragen said you had this weekend off. Let's look for an apartment together."

Olivia stopped walking and looked at her. "Are you sure?"

"Liv, we lost so much time. And I want any downtime we have to be able to spend it together. I love you, more than I ever thought possible. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want to be Alex's Mommy. And I want to be the Mommy to any other children you will have."

As tears fell from Olivia's eyes, she said, "And so you will be. I love you, Alex."

The End

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