DISCLAIMER: The story, and characters and anything and everything else concerning SG: SG1 belong to MGM, Gekko, Secret Productions etc, they are so not mine and no money is being made from this and no copyright infringement is intended.
SPOILERS: Missing scene from Urgo.
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author

Down Memory Lane by the Scenic Route
By Celievamp

Urgo was singing. He had rifled through her memories to find a childhood Saturday morning during the school holidays. Sam was sitting with her brother in front of the TV watching cartoons, eating Cheerios or PopTarts or something equally wholesome. Her favourite cartoon had been Scooby Doo. She had always had a bit of a crush on Daphne.

"Scooby Scooby Doo, Where are you?"

Urgo had been singing it for an hour and a half now. At first it had been mildly amusing. Now Sam was on the point of screaming. If she could have got her hands around his throat he would have been throttled.

"For god's sake, Urgo. Give it a rest!" She slammed her hands down on her worktable and turned to face the alien entity.

"But you like that song," Urgo said plaintively.

"Yes, when I was eight!" Sam ran her fingers through her hair, seriously considering auto-brain surgery at this point. "Not now and certainly not over and over again."

"Oh. Okay." He was silent for a moment or two and then he started fidgeting again. Sam felt the slight tingling sensation that she had come to associate with Urgo rummaging through her mind.

A sudden highly distracting memory of Janet straddling her legs as she sat in this very chair stopped her dead in her tracks. Having already denuded her of her t shirt and bra, Janet's fingers were trailing gently over Sam's bare breasts as they kissed deeply. One of Sam's hands was twined in Janet's dark hair, the other supporting her back in case she slipped. A shiver of arousal ran through her. Sam gasped, shook her head. "Urgo! Remember that conversation Colonel O'Neill and I had with you earlier about privacy… Stop that! Why don't you go and bug Daniel for a while. Or Teal'c."

"But you're such an interesting person, Samantha," Urgo whined. "I mean, you even keep things hidden from yourself. Like this…"

It felt like a bolt of electricity jolting her spine. Her knees buckled. "What did you do?" she whispered. "Urgo… stop!" Memory bubbled through her mind. Terrible unending pain. Not her memory. Not her pain. Jolinar's. Binar touching her, the pain stick traveling down her abdomen to her crotch... her spine arching until she thought it would shatter "No…!" She convulsed, screaming, crashing to the floor as her body no longer obeyed her. Urgo looked guilty, then horrified and disappeared.

Janet had been monitoring all four affected SG1 members from her office. She had the sound muted, but Sam's scream caught her attention and she looked up in time so see her partner collapse in what looked like a classic grand mal convulsion. Almost simultaneously the other three SG1 members snapped upright, all shouting Sam's name.

Janet pressed the alarm button, grabbed her medical kit and rushed out to the isolation rooms. The SF stationed outside Sam's door was already inside, trying to stop Sam from hurting herself any further as she thrashed around. He held her down as Janet bared Sam's forearm, found a vein and began to push the anti-convulsant into her system. Once that had gone in and the convulsions began to ease, with the SF's help she got Sam into the recovery position and then gave her a strong sedative. She checked Sam's vitals. They were good, her heart rate beginning to return to something near normal. Her team was waiting outside with a gurney. "Okay. Get her to the infirmary. I want her prepped for another MRI. I'll be with her in a minute - I want to talk to the rest of SG1 for a moment. I get the feeling this has something to do with Urgo." With one last caress of Sam's hand she let her people take care of her.

O'Neill could barely restrain himself. He was yelling at Urgo who was cringing away. The SF gripped his gun more tightly, just in case that volcanic anger was suddenly directed in his direction instead of at the invisible entity that was allegedly stalking SG1. Personally he just thought they'd been through the Stargate one too many times. They had always been a little flaky. Definitely one chevron short of a gate address.

Janet walked in. Immediately Jack broke off from swearing at Urgo. 'Carter, what happened to Carter?' he asked.

'She had a seizure. I don't know whether it's a reaction to the implant or something that your little friend prompted. I need you to act as translator for me here. Urgo - what exactly did you do to Sam?'

'I didn't do anything,' the fat man whined. 'I didn't, really, we were just going through some of her memories together of when she was a kid, her favourite things, what her favourite things are now.' To Jack's surprise the man moved towards Doc Fraiser. 'You should see these two together sometime.' He made a suggestive gesture with his hands and wolf whistled. 'Hot!'

Janet noticed Jack's eyes track towards her. 'Colonel?'

'It's okay, Doc. Apparently Urgo was taking Carter down memory lane by the scenic route. Things that made her happy...' At that moment Urgo took it upon himself to share with Jack exactly what he had got from Carter about Janet and Jack knew he was blushing. The Doc must have caught on as she got a kind of deer in headlights look.

Janet realised that she was fairly high on the list of things that made Sam Carter happy and began to get seriously worried.

'Okay so I'm guessing that's not what tipped Carter,' Jack said, his mouth suddenly dry. What he had just seen in vivid technicolour was way beyond regulation behaviour and definitely TMI about his 2IC's sex life. But, a part of him said, Urgo was right. It was definitely hot.

'Well, she started going on to me about privacy again and I said as how she hid things even from herself. I could see it, a whole area of her brain that she had just about closed off from herself and I took a peek...'

O'Neill realised what must have happened. 'Ah, crap. Urgo - what did you do that for? You must have realised those memories were closed off for a reason, that they aren't exactly Carter's. I mean you know about Jolinar, all the crap that snake put her through.'

'Jolinar? He accessed Jolinar's memories!' Janet wished there was some way that she could cause the alien AI a lot of pain for what he had done. 'No wonder... Colonel, I have to go and see to Sam. If you could impress on your invisible friend how bad an idea that was and for him not to do it again.'

'Don't worry, Doc - about any thing. You two are good for each other. I would never do anything to jeopardize...' He didn't want to say any more, not certain who was monitoring.

Janet gave him a long searching look and then slowly nodded. 'Thank you, sir. That means a lot.'

Sam's MRI showed the same areas of activity as the previous scans had done. Janet breathed a sigh of relief. They were still unusual but the unusual generally passed for normal these days. What didn't kill you… her attention shifted as the still figure in the bed moaned softly. Janet placed her hand around Sam's wrist, knowing that the contact would reassure her and ground her friend. "Sam, you're okay, you're in the infirmary."

"Aches…" Sam murmured, her eyes opening slightly before closing again, wincing at the bright light.

"You had a seizure. You're probably going to feel a little sore. But you're going to be fine."

"Urgo… `member made me… Jolinar," Sam said. "And you."

"It has been strongly suggested to him that he not try that again," Janet said. "I think he's rather glad he's incorporeal at the moment."

"The Colonel threaten to rip him a new one?" Sam asked, her eyes fully open now.

"Something like that," Janet smiled. "Now you've still got a fair amount of sedative in your system so I want you to sleep for a while, okay?"

"Sleep is good," Sam agreed solemnly. "Stay until I go, will you?" Janet was still holding her hand. Sam tightened her fingers around Janet's squeezing gently, smiling when Janet squeezed back. She closed her eyes and let the sedative take her.

The End

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