DISCLAIMER: Criminal Minds and its characters are the property of CBS. Poison is the property of Epic, Desmond Child and Alice Cooper. No infringement intended.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Thank you, Em. Thank you so much for putting up with my grammar and giving me the encouragement I needed to finally get this done.
CHALLENGE: Written for the first International Day of Femslash.
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.
The Fun Part of Falling
By Major Roon
A deep breath found its way into Bailey Garcia's lungs as she opened her eyes slowly and stared up at the ceiling from her position on the floor.
The carpet was rather soft against her back but still, lying on the ground was not where she thought she would end up today.
Slowly, very slowly, Penelope's face came into view but Bailey kept staring at the ceiling, too baffled to react. Frankly, she was also a bit stunned and somehow angry. "I'm…I'm so very sorry," Penelope whimpered.
Bailey smiled a rather ironic smile up at her and sighed at her own predicament. How she ended up like this yet again? Well, that is an interesting question…or a rather interesting story.
"Hey, Garcia!"
Penelope turned a bit startled, feeling caught. Actually she was caught because she had tried to sneak out of her office to catch Bailey at the elevators before the woman ran into her colleagues and friends which would have definitely resulted in questioning and odd conversations.
"Where are you sneaking off to," Emily asked smiling. Penelope bit her lip, threw another longing glance at the elevators then shuffled towards her friends.
"We wanna go out…you in?" Morgan smiled down at her and put an arm around her shoulders gently.
"Actually…uh, Bailey and I have plans."
"Well," Emily started, "why don't you two join us?"
Penelope was sure that her two friends saw right through her…with being profilers and all.
"Yeah. It's about time we got to know her…"
Devious. That's what they are, devious.
"I dunno…uh, I should ask her first." And what are the chances she'll say no?
"Look, there she is," Emily pointed past her to the door where Bailey was leaning casually against the doorframe, keeping a respectful distance.
Penelope smiled shyly at her and waited. Somehow they had this wordless communication thing down to a T. It worked again this time and the SWAT-agent started to walk toward them casually. Penelope couldn't help but observe the barely-there swing of her hips; the blonde bit her lip coyly and tried to act as nonchalantly as possible in front of her friends (which did not work so well … with them being profilers and all).
Bailey greeted her with a softly spoken "Hey" and a kiss on the cheek. Penelope was grateful for the innocent interaction because she would've clearly flung herself at the woman if given a choice. Seeing that the blonde wouldn't be saying anything anytime soon, Emily took over and just shook Bailey's hand.
It somehow felt odd, Prentiss thought but just got over it. The woman had saved her life but Bailey didn't seem to think about that at all, she just smiled friendly. "We were just asking Penelope to go out with us. She said you two had plans but we were wondering if the two of you would like to join us instead?"
Bailey nodded and placed her hand carefully on Garcia's back; she didn't seem to notice, Penelope however did. "I'd like that," Bailey glanced down at the blonde, "if it's okay with you, of course."
"Uh huh." Eloquent, Penelope, really. No one could've said it better.
"Okay, I've just got to head home and change…" Apparently Bailey wasn't the only one. They agreed on a time and a place…
Penelope was a bit nervous because in a few moments she would step into Bailey's apartment and she had never been there before. "Don't expect too much," the black-haired woman said casually.
The blonde just nodded, not really sure what to expect anyway and followed Bailey into the apartment. "I'll be right back…just make yourself at home." Penelope nodded again and took a look around. She decided to sit on the black leather sofa but then was afraid to; it looked so clean and wrinkle free.
Actually, Penelope thought, the whole place looked clean and wrinkle free. "You really are a neat freak." Garcia cringed inwardly as she heard Bailey chuckle not too far away.
"You know, that's not the first time someone said that."
Penelope followed the voice slowly.
"I'm practically living at work so it's only natural that this place is somewhat pristine."
And there she was, Bailey Garcia, in her bra. "Wow…" It was when her eyes connected with green ones that she realized she was staring. Stuttering she turned. "Sorry," she finally managed to say.
"Well…thanks and don't worry about it. I'm not naked or anything." Penelope heard the smile in Bailey's voice but was too preoccupied with regaining her composure to comment on it. "You know," Bailey's voice came closer, "you can turn around. I'm wearing a tank top now…"
"Can't."
The SWAT-agent chuckled and Penelope realized the woman was standing right behind her. "Why's that?"
"Blushing…"
Bailey chuckled again and rounded her slowly. "You're cute when you're blushing…see," she tabbed Penelope's nose, "cutest girl in the world."
"You're doing this on purpose, aren't you?" Garcia blushed further.
"Well, I could be persuaded to stop in exchange for a proper kiss."
Penelope smirked then proceeded to do just that. The kiss ended after a few moments and the blonde just swooned at the SWAT-agent and kissed her again because Bailey plus proper kissing was just something that was hard to resist. The way her lips were devoured so passionately made Penelope feel sexy and desired and so she just went with that feeling.
They had made out before on Penelope's couch the other day and once, instead of going for breakfast before work, they had spent 30 minutes just kissing in Bailey's car. Garcia had been grateful for being able to let the teenager out she once was, or rather had wanted to be. Back then she had mourned the loss of her parents and hadn't had the time to think about make-out sessions in cars.
All this was somewhat new to Penelope. Touching Bailey, really touching her, had been awkward the first time and the blonde hadn't known where to put her hands in the beginning but now she had it all figured out. She was becoming a pro at making-out. Her fingertips danced over Bailey's back in search of a little naked skin and she found it at the small of her back, there she brought her hands under the flimsy tank top.
The blonde felt muscles tense; it had happened before and she assumed Bailey was ticklish there. The muscles relaxed suddenly, that had never happened before though, and curious as she was, Penelope dug her fingertips into the flesh underneath them.
For a brief moment Garcia wondered if Bailey was trying to get away from her exploring hands or just closer to her as she arched her back but didn't concern herself with that for long because she felt herself take a step back and then another and another, Bailey following her willingly.
Penelope was glad Bailey had muscles because that meant she didn't crush the blonde by falling on top of her but was able to hold herself up and then lower her body slowly onto Garcia's.
It didn't occur to Penelope what exactly she was doing until she felt a warm hand wander up her thigh.
She heard Bailey exclaim a loud 'whoa' and then a thud. For a moment Garcia was stunned and couldn't move a single inch then the SWAT-agent coughed a few times and the blonde scrambled off the bed and to the ground. "Oh god! Oh god! Are you okay?"
Bailey blinked a few times, unsure of what just happened. "Uh…yeah." She realized that Penelope had indeed pushed her off the bed and that she was indeed lying flat on her back on the ground. Awesome.
"I'm so sorry. I dunno what happened…"
Penelope helped a frazzled Bailey to get up, biting her lower lip guiltily. "Well…Penelope. What…I mean, why…are you okay?"
Garcia's pained expression was a bit alarming. "Yeah…no, I mean…I'm okay but really sorry."
She really was, Bailey could see that. She had no idea what just happened but decided to be understanding and compassionate. "It's okay…don't worry about it."
"Really?"
The SWAT-agent smiled gently. "Really." She took Penelope's hand and kissed the knuckles. "C'mon, we should get going."
"Are you nervous?"
"No…a bit…definitely." Bailey threw a glance at Penelope and the lower lip that was being chewed on and just took the blonde's hand. "They're your friends and they invited us both…they're probably just curious and want to make sure you're treated well."
"It's not that," Penelope said as she entered the bar through the door that was being opened for her. "They wouldn't be mean to you…or me. But they will ask things and I'm not sure if I can answer them."
Bailey nodded solemnly upon entering the dimly lit bar. "So…you're not comfortable talking about 'us'?" She had it figured out and it occurred to Penelope that the SWAT-agent always seemed to be a step ahead of her. "I guess. I just need to figure all those things out before I can talk to somebody else about them."
Was Bailey mad? No. "But I'll do my best. Promise."
The black-haired woman brought an arm around her waist and smiled. "We're in this together, remember? Let's just figure things out along the way, huh?"
Together. Right. Somehow together sounded comforting. "Now hurry, hot stuff," Penelope said with a teasing grin, snuggling into the arm, "your girlfriend is in desperate need of some Sex on the Beach."
"The drink or the real thing?"
"Depends…the mighty oracle of Garcia is still indecisive."
Then they were kissing again, not for long though. "I see the party's already started without us."
Penelope tore her lips away from Bailey's, licked them quickly and grinned smugly at the dazed expression on her girlfriend's lips (yes, she could use that word now). JJ and Emily smirked at them both. The two had the tendency to just pop up from out of nowhere and often as a pair – strange.
To everyone's surprise, Bailey pretty much hit it off with Morgan. Right now they were grinding into each other on the dance floor. What made everyone laugh though was Morgan rubbing his backside up and down Bailey's front in a rather stripper-like manner.
Penelope was not jealous, not at all. Not even a tiny bit, because Bailey was one of the most loyal people Penelope had ever met and on top of that she was gayer than Ellen Degeneres and Rosie O'Donnell combined.
"So," Emily said cheerily – suspiciously cheerily. "What's she like?"
Penelope swirled her finger in her drink and nipped a few drops off her fingertip. "Dunno. You're the profiler, you tell me."
"You actually want me to profile her?" Both JJ and Penelope knew she was joking of course but played along.
"Oh, please, no. Whatever quirks she might have, I rather find out on my own." And that was that.
"So, no quirks yet?"
Garcia grinned and turned away from the dance floor and towards her friends. "Well, there's the matter of the tank tops."
"Tank tops," JJ asked, leaning over the table a bit.
"Yeah, she always wears them…and they're flimsy and tiny and tight…real tight, as you can see." Penelope lifted her eyebrows suggestively and purred a bit just because she felt like it.
JJ glanced at Bailey, a tiny seductive smirk forming on her lips. "Yeah…what's it with women in tank tops?"
Emily nudged her. "Hey!" The brunette said, paused then added as an afterthought, "that's Garcia's girlfriend we're talking about here."
"Yeah, she is," Penelope murmured, now ogling the SWAT-agent herself who was now surrounded by three guys while Morgan had found himself his own dance partners. "Just look at her move…like a cat." A woman appeared from out of nowhere and practically thrust her backside into Bailey's body. "Whoa! What's the alley cat doing with my girl?!"
Garcia was on her feet in less than a second, her resolve-face firmly in place and marched onto the dance floor. The 'alley cat' girl looked slightly irritated as Bailey suddenly lost all interest in her and started smooching all over a blonde chick.
"That is so sweet," Emily said.
"Well…can't see the sweet part in that grinding match." JJ snorted amused as Bailey nibbled on Penelope's shoulder, causing the blonde to lean heavily against the strong body behind her.
"C'mon, let's show them how it's done!"
JJ threw a glance and a crooked smile at the woman next to her. "I'm game if you are…"
Bailey played possum. She felt the eyes on her but didn't move despite not knowing what all this was about.
And neither did Penelope. The blonde just stood there in the darkness of her own apartment and watched the woman sleeping peacefully on her couch. It was the second time that Bailey spent the night. The first time had been right after that awful thing happening to Emily.
Garcia couldn't sleep, she had been tossing and turning, mostly thinking about Bailey and life in general – not something to put one to sleep quickly – and that was why she was standing there and staring.
Somehow she felt weird all over and she knew why. One of the groundbreaking thoughts she had come up with while trying to sleep was that Bailey had made all the first steps in this thing they were having; she had asked Penelope out, she had called, she had broached the girlfriend subject, she had agreed to meet her friends.
She kissed me, Penelope thought smiling. But they were in this together which meant Bailey couldn't do all the steps. Groundbreaking.
Now Garcia just had to get over her fear.
In the beginning she had thought that she was more than okay with this whole lesbian thing but apparently she wasn't. Or maybe it wasn't the lesbian part that scared her?
Penelope sighed quietly. Maybe the 'thing' was what scared her? That was probably it, she mused. She avoided calling this 'thing' a relationship after all.
"Are you awake?" Bailey didn't move an inch and Penelope was tempted to roll her eyes. Instead she shuffled over to the couch and kneeled down in front of the woman. "Don't tell me your super SWAT-agent senses didn't pick up on someone watching you sleep?"
Lips curled upward in a smile and green eyes opened slowly. "Just thought you might need some time to think," Bailey whispered and Penelope said nothing. "Any revelations?" She reached out and let a single strand of blonde hair glide through her fingers.
"You could say that…but now I'm going to sleep, the oracle needs rest after so much prophesying." Penelope pecked the SWAT-agent on the lips and stood, extending her hand. "Coming?"
Bailey narrowed her eyes briefly then shot up from the couch with a bad case of bed hair. "You sure?"
"Absolutely, a 100% sure. Now c'mon, the oracle has spoken."
Bailey took her hand readily and followed, trying to smooth her tank top out on the way. Penelope crawled in first and scooted to the left a little, Bailey lifted the covers delicately and slid under them, secretly fearing to end up on the floor in mere minutes.
Penelope turned away, her breath hitching. This was harder than she thought it would be.
Well, you could at least turn back around.
Oh god. I'm in bed with a lesbian. I am in bed with a lesbian. What does one do in such situations?
Turning back around?
Right. Easy for you to say. My lesbian experience is close to zilch, really. I mean, sure, I'm in a rather successful relationship – see I can say it – but still…I deserve some insecurity.
Turn around, her inner voice stated dryly. Now!
Oh…
Penelope's body tensed for only a second then relaxed and finally molded into the body that was spooning her from behind. "G'night," Bailey whispered into her ear then kissed the blonde's shoulder tenderly.
"'Night."
With eyes wide open Penelope tried to absorb the feeling of an arm draped over her waist and warm breath hitting her neck in regular intervals. There was also something – or rather two somethings – that caught her attention. Breasts. Pressed against her back.
She closed her eyes slowly and let the warmth of Bailey's form seep through her clothes. Wonderful. Almost as wonderful as Bailey's scent or how perfectly their bodies molded into each other. With a gentle sigh Penelope entwined her fingers with the ones resting on her stomach and just went to sleep.
"What the hell?"
Penelope groaned at the words but kept sleeping. When the warm pillow she was lying on shifted she murmured her disapproval and as it just disappeared from right under her she burrowed her face in yet another, not as soft pillow. At least it smelled the same, she thought and rolled onto her stomach and into the warm spot under the blanket she had just found.
She heard a loud noise and realized that someone was banging at her door then she heard Bailey's voice muttering curses.
"SSA Rossi?"
What? Rossi…wait…oh, crap!
"Where is she?"
"Well, good morning to you too. It's Sunday and it's early, I hope you are aware of that."
"I don't have time for this…"
Penelope, still half asleep, grabbed her robe and tried to hide as much of herself in it as possible as she stepped through the curtain of pearls and other glittery things. "Agent Rossi?" The blonde's gaze wandered from him to Bailey who stood there in her boxers and the flimsy excuse of a tank top.
Oh, great.
Rossi noticed too but only for a brief moment. His eyes fixed on her. "This can't be everything," he announced gruffly, moving past Bailey breezily.
"You're coming in, how nice," the SWAT-agent commented which went unnoticed by Rossi as well as Garcia.
"The double homicide in Indianapolis. There has to be more than this case file."
"Uh, sir…"
"Where are my notes? My original crime scene notes," Rossi interrupted.
"Sir, you didn't ask for the specifics." Penelope was getting annoyed and glanced at Bailey over her colleague's shoulder; the woman did not look happy.
"Do I have to tell you to look for everything? What kind of researcher are you?"
Garcia steeled her gaze. "I'm not a researcher, I'm a technical analyst."
"What the hell does that even mean?"
The blonde glanced over his shoulder again and this time he noticed that her attention wasn't solely on him. Somehow that shook him out of his stupor and he glanced at Bailey. She looked quite threatening, he thought, even in that ridiculous outfit.
"I think you should go," Bailey stated calmly and watched him contemplate. He did not leave however.
"It's the 20th anniversary of this crime," he stated in Bailey's direction then averted his eyes and fixed them on Penelope instead. "20 years tomorrow three children woke up and found their parents murdered and whoever did it is still out there. It's time they pay for it."
With a pointed look he turned and breezed out of the apartment and Bailey slammed the door behind him. "Well, that was interesting."
"I don't know what's gotten into him," Penelope mumbled.
"Well…it's Sunday, it's early and I'm going back to bed."
"Are you crazy?"
"No more than that guy…" Bailey pointed over her shoulder at the closed door. "It's not like he's sitting outside in the bushes watching us through the window with his binoculars."
"Creepy thought."
Back in bed Penelope slumped right into Bailey's embrace and tried to go back to sleep but she kept thinking about Rossi. She had never seen him so upset. Frankly, she was worried.
"If you're still worried tomorrow you can talk to Agent Hotchner about it or something," Bailey mumbled, reading Penelope's mind, "but now it's Sunday. Your first day off in a week after a hard case…'sides, I've been crawling through mud all week and deserve a little time with my Beauty Queen."
Garcia smiled a little, closed her eyes and attempted to sleep. It didn't work however, instead she was thinking about the fact that her chin almost touched Bailey's breast and that, if she glanced down and shifted a little, she might be able to look under the tank top.
Then her thoughts wandered to the night they had shared together. No fights over the blanket, lots of snuggling going on but no space issues. Penelope was convinced that the sleeping behavior of a person said much of their character and in her opinion Bailey was just a perfect bed mate.
When she was about to go to sleep Bailey called her name softly; apparently the SWAT-agent had been deep in thought as well.
"You're beautiful."
Garcia smiled.
"Penelope?"
"Yeah?"
"You wanna go out with me on a date today? Dinner?"
Garcia smiled again. "Sure."
"Penelope?"
"Yes?"
"Can I kiss you?"
Garcia lifted her head with deliberate slowness, her eyes shining with amusement. "I don't know about that…"
Bailey brought her arms around the woman above her and grinned slyly. "Hmm, maybe I should just find out?"
"Most definitely."
Penelope sunk into the lips and the body beneath her and purred into the kiss … she was a little kitten deep inside after all. A few moments later she felt Bailey's warm hands wander under her shirt; Penelope grinned.
"You feel nice," the SWAT-agent said quietly, softly stroking her hands up and down Penelope's back. "So soft…"
The blonde chuckled down at the dreamy face. "So I've notice," she stated dryly, wriggling a bit.
Bailey moved up and started kissing Penelope's throat gently. "Not that," she whispered against the blonde's neck. "Your skin's so soft. It's amazing."
Penelope's eyes closed quite involuntarily and she had to groan just a little bit as Bailey kissed up towards her ear. Then warm breath wandered over her face, moist lips touching her skin a few times on their journey and then they settled onto another pair of lips and kissed.
Bailey rolled them over carefully and came to rest on top, looking down at a dazed looking face with tousled hair framing it. "You know what I've been asking myself?"
Penelope said nothing, the question not really making sense to her right now in her kiss-induced haze.
"I've been asking myself if you feel that way everywhere," Bailey whispered breathily.
Penelope again said nothing and just brought those lips she somehow yearned to kiss back on hers. Bailey kissed back, touched the blonde's thigh (and it felt good), touched her waist (felt even better) and let her hand wander under the shirt Penelope was wearing to touch the soft skin she had been wondering about (bliss).
The blonde made an attempt to purr but ended up groaning as Bailey settled down between her thighs.
"Whoa!" Thud.
Penelope covered her mouth with her hand to contain the shriek she was about to let lose, her eyes as big as saucers. Swallowing heavily, the blonde dared moving and looked down at the crumbled figure on the floor.
A moment passed between them in which their eyes connected. "I'm sorry," Penelope whimpered; shocked, embarrassed and most of all feeling quite guilty.
"I think we covered that the last time," Bailey picked herself up off the ground and slumped down on the bed, hands covering her face. Sighing deeply Bailey glanced at the worried looking blonde next to her. "Okay … what did just happen?"
Penelope bit her lip. "I dunno," she whimpered.
Bailey sighed again and the blonde watched her falling on her back on the bed tiredly. "Are you more of a top-person or …"
"No! No, no, no. I'm actually quite the all-rounder."
"Then what is it? Where did I go wrong?"
Penelope looked down at the somewhat lost seeming woman. "You didn't go wrong anywhere."
"I must have done something, Penelope. It's not like throwing your girlfriend out of bed is somehow a turn on for you?" Bailey narrowed her eyes, thinking. "Or is it?"
"First of all: nooooo, it's not and secondly: I did not throw … I pushed."
"And that's any better how?"
Penelope sighed. "It really isn't your fault. It's me and I know that they always say that in those sappy movies but in my case it's true."
After a moment of consideration Bailey sat up slowly. "Then…what is it? What's wrong?" Her eyes widened. "Is it the lesbian thing?"
"No," Penelope said quite certain. "Although it makes me a little nervous but that's definitely not it."
"Then what? C'mon, talk to me."
The blonde sighed deeply and started to fiddle with the hem of her shirt. She had no idea what to say, because she had no idea what was really going on herself. "I dunno … I'm just…scared."
"Scared?" Bailey reached out and took Penelope's hands in hers. "I would never hurt you, I would never do anything you don't want."
"I know that." The blonde squeezed the hands holding her own helplessly. It wasn't supposed to be like this; this was just the beginning and in the beginning everything was pink and fluffy and perfect.
Why do I have to be so difficult?
"I really don't know what I'm afraid of," Penelope said quietly, "I just know that I'm scared."
Bailey sighed. "Okay." She kissed the blonde forlorn figure comfortingly and got to her feet slowly. Penelope just watched the black-haired woman anxiously until she realized that Bailey was fastening the belt on her pants and was looking for her shoes.
And for a brief moment Penelope felt only panic well up inside her; it felt so devastatingly gruesome that she thought she might pass out from the sheer loneliness that was washing over her.
"You're leaving?" She gasped.
Bailey turned, oblivious to the blonde's state of mind. "Uh, yeah." Her eyes narrowed as she caught sight of the distraught woman on the bed. "To…uh, you know, walk down to the bakery and get us some breakfast stuff. And, frankly, I need to process this whole thing for just a few minutes…alone."
Now she felt foolish. To think Bailey would just leave her all of a sudden when there was a minor bump in the road. That wasn't like Bailey at all and how foolish can one be to think something like that?
"Breakfast," Penelope stuttered breathily. "Sounds great, perfect." She put a smile on but Bailey wasn't fooled for a moment. The SWAT-agent forgot about her shoes immediately and sat on the bed gingerly.
"Penelope…you're important to me and that's why I want to make this work, so why don't we forget about this whole making-love thing for now and wait until you're ready and certain that I won't end up on the floor again?" She grinned slyly at the blonde and received a small smile in return. "No pressure, okay?"
"No pressure."
Penelope took the car on Monday for no special reason, except maybe that it was a beautiful day and she enjoyed the wind in her hair and the sun on her head. She also wanted to put the sunglasses on Bailey had given her.
They looked sort of cop-ish and didn't fit to Penelope's attire at all, but that wasn't a bad thing because they completed the craziness that was her outfit, hair and make-up instead.
Penelope parked her car carefully; she loved the car, it was her first and would be her last (at least she hoped so), because it had been a birthday present from her parents. It was one of the last things they had given her.
On the way up in the elevator Penelope mulled over her fear. It was weird because she couldn't understand herself at all. Bailey had been so patient, but what if she decided Penelope wasn't worth the bother one day?
What if sex is so important to her?
Of course sex is important to her, dum-dum! It's important to you too, remember?
Right.
Maybe she should talk to someone. Someone profiler-ish! Penelope looked around but couldn't spot Emily anywhere, actually, there wasn't anyone of the team. How odd.
JJ! The blonde dumped her things in her office and hurried towards another in full panic mode and barged just right in.
"JJ, I am so screwed!"
The blonde behind the desk blinked a few times, unimpressed. "I've really got a lot of work to do, Garcia…"
Penelope stared at the calm figure, sitting there, reading reports or whatever, nipping on that foam cup of some café and not listening. Tsk. "So, you don't wanna hear about my little excursion into lesbianism in which I pushed, no, threw, FBI SWAT-agent Bailey Garcia out of my bed during a wild make-out session?"
That apparently got JJ's attention. "Sit…"
Meanwhile Emily arrived. Today was such a beautiful day, she thought, and it wasn't annoying at all. Taking a sip of her coffee – it was from that new place, she dumped her stuff on her desk and turned, surveying the office.
Her eyes fell on something unusual; Rossi's office and the mess on the floor. "What the hell?"
"So you were about to…you know?" JJ wriggled her eyebrows suggestively.
"Oh, c'mon, I'm being serious. That's the second time it happened!" Penelope wanted to chew on her lip but remembered she was wearing lip gloss. Lip gloss on teeth – not pretty.
"The two of you were about to you know what twice?" JJ forestalled any protest with a raised hand. "I am serious, really." It didn't come across as such though because she was wearing a big fat grin.
Penelope on the other hand resigned herself to the fact that she would not be having a serious conversation with the press liaison today for whatever reasons. "This is just great. Everyone will make fun of me soon, Rossi especially. He just barged right in yesterday morning and Bailey was only in her boxers and tank top – which was very flimsy FYI and I had bed hair…"
"Wait, wait," JJ leaned forward in her seat. "Rossi barged into your apartment and saw Bailey barely clothed?"
"Yeah," Penelope said absent-mindedly, picking on her shirt. "So unfair, isn't it?"
"What did he want at your apartment anyway?"
"Well, that is a good…I'm not supposed to tell anyone."
A bit later that morning – when Rossi still hadn't shown up – Penelope caught Emily, Morgan and JJ arguing in Rossi's office. Then she heard her name being mentioned by JJ; thank you very much!
"You know something?" Emily asked with a concerned face.
"Well," just great, "I'm not supposed to tell anyone."
"He might need our help."
"He didn't ask for help."
Emily sighed briefly. "Penelope…Rossi is a guy who color-codes his handwritten notes in his notebooks…the guy is a…fussy, anal-retentive neat-freak, who never leaves anything out of its place. I would say this," Garcia looked past her into the 'messy' office. "This is a scream for help!"
They all looked pretty concerned. Oh, crap. "He went to Indianapolis to investigate a 20 year old homicide…and he seemed pretty upset yesterday."
She had been the poor soul to explain to Rossi why the team was suddenly on the way to help. They had left immediately of course and now she was all alone here and brooding. Brooding certainly didn't look good on her, Penelope also wasn't really able to pull it off; there was just too much color involved.
With a sigh Penelope decided to do something she wasn't supposed to do but was not forbidden. Her fingers flew over the keyboard and the information she was looking for popped up.
'SWAT-UNIT 1. Status: Team Alpha: passive – ready to move out. Team Beta: out of service – meal – basic training.'
How boring. Well, at least I'm not bored alone. Bailey was probably watching over the 'fledglings' (not something she enjoyed) or eating. Maybe she should order Chinese today given that she couldn't leave her post for even a minute.
"I love it when you spy on me."
Penelope almost jumped out of her seat. "Don't ever use your super SWAT-agent powers to sneak up on me like that!"
"Don't ever use your super technical analyst computer geek powers to spy on me!" Bailey grinned.
"I wasn't spying," the smell of food permeated Penelope's nose. "What's in that suspiciously looking paper bag you have there?"
"Chinese…"
"You know," the blonde stood slowly, "I would totally kiss you right now if you hadn't disregarded my rules so shamelessly. No. Food. Comes. Near. My. Babies."
Bailey looked down at the paper bag then at the heap of equipment the blonde had somehow managed to talk the FBI into giving her. She took a step back. "So…" The black-haired woman looked around for a surface that wasn't covered in something with cables attached.
"So, what's going on? Your team has a new case?"
Penelope chewed hungrily on her food, not answering for a few moments. "Well, Hotch and Reid are in prison and the rest went off to chase after Rossi who was 'AWOL' this morning but is now waiting begrudgingly on their arrival in Indianapolis."
Bailey chewed slower. "Okay." She didn't get it…at all.
"Hotch and Reid are interviewing a serial killer and the rest is on the way to Indianapolis to help Rossi solve that 20 year old homicide he was so passionately talking about yesterday."
The black-haired woman absent-mindedly poked at a slice of zucchini with her stick. "Well, I hope they find whoever did it…can't be healthy to carry that baggage around for 20 years."
The blonde nodded slowly. "Yeah, Rossi seemed really upset."
"That and a lil in the head."
"Hey!"
"What? Everyone's upset once in a while but that doesn't give 'em the right to just barge into someone's private life and behave like a monkey on speed." She ate the zucchini she had been poking at after all. "I really want to have a nice little chat with that Rossi guy, you know?"
"No." Penelope poked her with a stick of her own. "No nice little chats with SSA Rossi. Besides, there are fraternization rules and he saw us and when you anger him with your little chat we'll be so screwed!"
Bailey finally gave up on eating and sighed. "I don't even work for the BAU, not even in the same building," she grinned, smitten. "But I do think Rossi is the kind of guy why these rules exist in the first place."
Probably true, Penelope realized after thinking about it for just a second. "You're right … but he's actually a really nice guy. I like him and I think he likes me too – in an odd way."
The team was finally back. Rossi was back to normal at least and Penelope was relieved; another of his weird episodes would be just too much for her, especially if it meant that he showed up at her apartment.
She looked forward to tonight though because Bailey would take her out on yet another date. It was ridiculous to call them that after so many but Penelope liked saying that she had a 'hot date', so she kept doing it. They would go to that place they had their first real date at; the bar with the tiny bits of food all over a neat coffee table.
But somehow there was something weird about this date because Bailey had made it sound like it was some huge event, some surprise; Penelope had no idea what that was all about. She just hoped it was nothing bad…but then Bailey wouldn't be taking her to that special place. It was a special place somehow, wasn't it?
Penelope sighed and sulked until she heard someone knock on her door. It was Emily of course. Somehow the two of them had developed a pattern over the past few weeks; whenever the team came back from a case, the brunette would come get her for the debriefing.
"Time already?"
Emily shook her head and just plopped down on a chair. "Nope. We've still got a couple of minutes." She started to grin. "Why don't we use that time to talk about your Bailey-problems?"
"That is so mean! JJ just told you?"
"Well, not exactly. She didn't tell me what the problem is but thought that I could help you in some way." While Penelope sulked, or rather pretended to sulk to not appear too pleased that someone tried to help her out. Emily let her eyes wander about the room and found out, quite by accident that Penelope was monitoring the status of Bailey's team. It made her smile for a brief moment.
"Okay. But first you have to promise not to laugh."
Emily smirked. "Promise."
"The thing is that Bailey and I have been dating for some time now, right? And we haven't had…you know?"
"Sex?"
"Exactly."
Emily waited for something more but that seemed to be it for now. "She hasn't tried anything?"
"Well, she did. We were about to…you know?"
"Have sex?"
"Exactly."
The brunette started to get irritated by the vague answers. "But you didn't? Why's that?"
"That's the problem. I pushed her off of me…twice. She ended up on the floor both times."
"Well, that's…" Emily trailed off.
"Oh, you can say it."
"That's bad. And why did you do that?"
Penelope thought for a moment and realized that she still had no idea why she was doing this to Bailey and to herself for that matter. "I'm not sure. I just got scared…and no, it's not the lesbian thing."
"Did she…"
"No," Penelope interrupted. "She was sweet and perfect. Really, just perfect. She didn't freak me out with anything, she didn't do any weird stuff…everything was fine. It felt good, it felt better than good and I really wanted it but every time she's about to…you know?" Emily didn't know but nodded anyway. "I go and push her away."
The brunette looked at Penelope intently and the blonde became concerned that she might have some weird mental disease that was incurable and prevented her from having lesbian sex. "What is it?" Penelope's eyes widened. "You! You just did some profiler thing, didn't you?"
"I'm sorry. It's just…I don't know…"
"Well, now that you've started it you can finish it because I really want to get over this thing and have some mind-blowing hot sex, alright?"
Emily sighed and contemplated what to do until her eyes found the blonde's. "Okay." She took a deep breath because this wouldn't be easy. "We don't really know much about you…"
"That's not true. I tell you guys lots of things all the time."
"Exactly. You tell us lots of stuff about the now so that we don't ask about the before. It's okay if someone wants to forget the past for whatever reasons but sometimes it's also a way of protecting yourself and distance yourself." This really wasn't easy, Emily thought. She really didn't like doing this. "Just look at yourself, Penelope."
The blonde did just that. She looked down at herself with a rather frightful expression.
"I like you that way; crazy and all that. I only know you that way. But the way you look makes you less approachable, it's like a wall, like a…a protective shield so that people won't come too close."
Emily watched in dismay as Penelope's chin started to tremble and tears welled up in her eyes. "I'm sorry," the brunette reached out. "I shouldn't have said anything."
The blonde took a deep breath and blinked back the tears. "No, no, it's okay. I wanted this, now go on." She reached out also and took Emily's hand in hers carefully, trying to appear strong.
"I don't think it's a good idea."
"Please," Penelope said determined.
"Okay." Emily squeezed the hand she was holding. "People must've hurt you deeply in the past. I know that your parents died when you were very young. People let you down, left you, disappointed you and you started to build walls around yourself. And suddenly along came Bailey and asked you out. And she likes you the way you are, doesn't want to change anything about you and that scares you because where she sees something that attracts her, other people usually see an obstacle. Now the only wall you have to protect yourself is pushing her away."
"Okay…I get it…" Penelope sniffled.
"You're afraid that if you let her in, she's gonna hurt you. You're afraid of the pain."
Penelope had been unusually quiet during debriefing and only Emily knew why exactly; JJ had her suspicions and threw the occasional accusatory glance at Prentiss. Hotch and Reid were listening intently to the facts Morgan relayed while Rossi did mostly the same, his eyes conveying something akin to gratefulness.
After the debriefing the team filed out of the room in small groups, Penelope's eyes falling immediately on the tall figure of Bailey, leaning against Emily's desk. When the SWAT-agent saw her, she appeared to almost die of nervousness, as if she were about to be married to the worst guy on earth with the promise to produce at least six offspring.
It was kinda cute.
"You off on a date?"
Penelope glanced sideways at Emily then realized that half the team was eyeing Bailey. "Uh, yeah. Bailey got something special planned…god, I hate surprises…until I know what they are, of course."
"Hey, gorgeous."
The blonde whirled around again and grinned as broadly as she possibly could. Bailey's eyes were shining but then clouded over and that mean little eyebrow rose. Oh, crap. Agent Rossi moved past the blonde and down the small flight of stairs. "Could I have a moment of your time?"
Penelope trotted after him, dreading the conversation already.
"Agent Garcia, Penelope," he began, sounding so official but then again, when didn't he? "I would like to apologize for intruding on your privacy and for being so…harsh."
"It's okay, sir." The blonde glanced from Rossi to Bailey and back again, noting the impassive expression on both their faces; this was not good.
"SSA Rossi." Bailey stuck out her hand. "Apology accepted."
Oh.
"Thank you." A handshake later Bailey dragged her girlfriend off to the elevators under the amused eyes of the team.
First the same restaurant, now even the same table? Penelope glanced at her date and frowned as Bailey started to wipe her presumably sweaty hands on her pants.
They had shared a cocktail (yummy) and had eaten almost every piece of food with which they had been presented; Penelope had even tried some ugly looking green algae thing and had been relieved when it did not taste of grass but rather of salt and nothing much else.
What the hell was all this about?
The blonde took a deep but quiet breath and tried to will herself to stay calm but somehow she couldn't. What if something bad was about to happen? Oh, god. What if she really wants to break up with me?
It was the most irrational thing to think but Penelope couldn't help it.
"Penelope?"
The blonde's eyes focused on Bailey's and she realized she must have spaced out pretty badly.
"Are you okay?"
"Uh…" Was she? "Well, this has been really nice and everything but I think that there's something you wanna tell me and that's making me kind of nervous."
"Oh."
Oh? That was it?
"Uh…" Suddenly Bailey took her hands in her own (they were sweaty, just a bit) and cleared her throat. "To be honest, I'm a nervous wreck right now because there's indeed something I wanted to tell you."
Penelope nodded slowly. "Okay?"
"It's nothing bad…at least I hope so."
"Okay."
"Penelope…" Bailey took another deep breath. "Penelope…we've been seeing each other for some time now and I realized that…that I haven't told you how much you mean to me."
That's what she's so worked up about? "But you've told me you liked me a lot often…really."
"Yes, well, I told you that…but not how much 'a lot' actually is."
Oh, god.
"Penelope."
"Yes?"
"The thing is…I'm in love with you. Madly in love and … and that's weird, well not weird per se, just you know…it's strange because I've never felt like that for anyone before."
Oh, how cute she was…stuttering and totally inarticulate but Penelope wouldn't want her any other way.
"That just didn't come out the way I wanted it to…let me start over." Bailey took yet another breath and tried to collect herself. "Penelope, I'm very much in love with you…I've never felt this way before for anyone…and being with you is one of the best things in my life, you're one of the best things in my life…I just wanted you to know that."
On the verge of a happy tears crying fit Penelope reached out and kissed Bailey with abandon, hoping that the gestured conveyed the words she wasn't able to say. When she drew away after some time, the blonde looked into Bailey's eyes and the longer she stared the harder it became to form those words.
It was a scaring experience to want to say something so badly but just not being able to.
"It's okay," Bailey said quietly, a small, reassuring smile on her lips.
It was not okay, Penelope thought dismayed. It was not okay at all. She should be able to say it, it wasn't so hard, other people could do it too.
A few occupants of the restaurant stared as the blonde woman devoured the lips of the other passionately, totally disregarding good manners. Get a room.
Penelope looked out of the window of the driving car with a small, serene smile on her lips.
"You okay?"
The blonde looked over briefly and smiled reassuringly at the driver of the car. "More than okay."
"Penelope?"
The blonde turned back around once more.
"Would you like to spend the night at my place?"
Penelope considered it for a moment. "I would really like to but let's face it, I won't be fitting into any of your things and I really can't sleep in these clothes."
Bailey grinned. "You could always sleep in the nude…"
"You pig!" They both chuckled a little then Penelope glanced at the woman next to her. The date had been fabulous and she really didn't want it to end and she also really didn't want to sleep all alone in her bed tonight. But more importantly, she wanted to feel Bailey as close physically as she felt emotionally to her. "Why don't you stay at my place? I'm sure you have some tank top hidden underneath that sexy shirt?"
"If I say no, can I sleep in the nude then?"
"Not if you wanna get slapped on the ass for being so naughty, Miss Piggy."
"Aww…"
After a short while they stopped in front of Penelope's apartment building but before they made their way over, Bailey opened the trunk of her car and got a little bag out of it.
"What's that? More surprises?"
"Nope…just an overnight bag," Bailey remarked grinning, putting an arm around her blonde girlfriend.
"Am I that predictable?"
Bailey kissed the blonde's temple gently as they crossed the street arm in arm. "Nah, you're quite unpredictable."
"Hmm," Penelope huffed. "Then I guess you just get me…"
"You can leave the pajama bottoms on but the shirt seriously has to go, it totally cramps my style."
Bailey looked down at herself then at Penelope, already lying in bed and waiting for her. "Your style?"
"Hello," the blonde sat up. "How am I supposed to get all touchy-feely with that in the way?"
The SWAT-agent unbuttoned the shirt again. "Now who's Miss Piggy," she commented dryly while revealing – to Penelope's joy – yet another flimsy tank top underneath. "Better?" Bailey asked after taking the offending article off.
"Much…now c'mere, hot stuff."
Bailey did as she was told and got into bed without another word just to be used as a cuddly teddy bear as soon as her head hit the pillow. For a moment, while she stroked through blonde, soft hair, she thought that this was where she wanted to be every evening for a very long time. Penelope was indeed very touchy-feely, very affectionate and right now that was enough.
If she could just find a way to ease the blonde's fears and help her overcome whatever it was that bothered her so much. She was usually very reserved, a rational person but with Penelope everything was different and somehow that was what Bailey realized she needed the most. Someone who made her stay true to herself, someone who drew her out of her shell.
She just wished she could do the same for Penelope. Feeling helpless was one of the most annoying things for Bailey Garcia; she wanted to handle things, find solutions but not stand by and let things happen, that wasn't like her. So, the only possible course of action was to be there, be supportive and tell Penelope what she meant to her. That was important, so that the blonde wouldn't lose faith.
"Tonight was wonderful," the blonde whispered suddenly which made Bailey smile, her eyes drooping.
"It was."
"The best date I've ever had."
Indeed. "I'm glad."
Penelope squirmed around a bit until her face was buried in raven stresses and the soft skin of Bailey's neck where she tickled the little hairs there with her breath. The blonde felt contentment wash over her in waves of warm fuzziness, her senses taking in the moment. "I'm in love with you too."
There it was and it hadn't been so hard to say at all. Bailey squeezed her tightly and kissed the top of her head, her fingers weaving through blonde hair tenderly. Penelope just thought that such tenderness could never hurt, never. Before she could fall asleep, the blonde rose onto her elbows and looked down into Bailey's eyes, looking for something; what, she didn't know.
Bailey just smiled faintly, barely awake but looking so content with everything, with being here, lying there with Penelope in her arms. Just like that; not expecting anything, not going anywhere.
"I've never met anyone like you before," Bailey said quietly, her fingertips touching Penelope's cheek then letting a strand of blonde hair glide through her fingers. "I'm in love with you…madly in love with you, Penelope Garcia." She said it as if it were some great mystery she had yet to figure out.
The blonde grinned coyly and let the statement sink in and when it did she looked into those eyes again but gave up searching and just took those words and their meaning for what they were. Penelope didn't have to make up her mind, didn't have to contemplate, and didn't have to ask herself if she was sure. She just bent down and kissed the woman; tenderly in one moment, fierce the next.
And Bailey stayed true to her word; no pressure. She just lay there, holding Penelope gently and kissed back. Then the flimsy tank top was rolled up and finally discarded and there she was, Bailey.
Penelope had never kissed a woman's breasts before but right now she really wanted to. She bent down again and just did it, with the utmost tenderness. She touched the softness of breasts, got her first taste of Bailey's skin, felt the strength that was hidden underneath its silkiness.
Bailey moaned helplessly and held her tightly; no pressure but tight. "I want to feel you on top of me," Penelope husked and received a clear, concerned look.
"You sure?"
The blonde rolled off of her, Bailey following immediately, the contact of the warm body too precious to lose. If she ended up on the floor again, so be it because right now that didn't matter, it wouldn't happen, it wouldn't this time, she was certain of it.
With a sigh Penelope felt herself surrender, comforted by the weight of the warm body above her. Everything was warm, even as the buttons on her shirt were being opened; Bailey's lips were warm against her skin, her tongue hot. The blonde moaned gently because it felt so good, everything felt so good.
Bailey's back felt wonderful as she dug her fingers into it, her shampoo and the perfume Penelope was sure Bailey didn't wear but smelled anyway. And her skin against her own, that was the best thing.
Clothes flew in every possible direction, Penelope was sure her underwear had landed on the lamp on the nightstand and she became impatient because well, how many clothes can two people wear to bed? And how long does it take for them to be gone?
Gosh, being naked had never felt so good before in her life.
Looking up into the eyes of her soon-to-be lover, Penelope waited, her body tense from anticipation, her breath coming in short gasps. She might pass out in a moment, the blonde thought as she panted Bailey's name with a desperate, needy voice.
When the hand that had journeyed from her thigh, to her hip, to her side, breasts and down her stomach had finally arrived at its destination Penelope's eyelids fluttered and an overwhelming sense of relieve washed over her, she knew that everything was meant to be this was. She just grabbed a handful of black, tousled hair and guided Bailey's lips to her breast again.
Penelope was glad her face was out of sight because her eyes rolled back in her head rather unattractively at that moment.
And it went on and on, seemingly never stopping. Bailey was playing, the blonde knew it, enjoyed it, wanted to prolong it even despite feeling needy. But, ultimately, it had to end, for now at least and it wasn't so bad, because Penelope knew they could do it again and again and again.
The blonde shuddered, her lips joining in, trembling, tingling until they were covered roughly by another pair and she held Bailey tightly, so tightly she thought she might crush her in the end. Penelope didn't however and moaned because this was just fantastic; indescribably, unbelievably, incredibly orgasmic, literally.
And so she lay there, stunned. Wow. Swooning. And then she thought about what had just happened and immediately wanted to do it again. The blonde dug her nails into her back, scratched a bit and Bailey moaned; she liked it apparently.
Good for the kitten then…
Penelope licked her lips impatiently and Bailey grinned down at her. "I think I'd like a taste of that," the SWAT-agent said huskily, wriggling her eyebrows suggestively. The blonde chuckled and prepared for a kiss; she wasn't kissed however…
"Oh, god! Oh, god! Oh god oh god oh god!"
…well, not on the mouth at least.
It was morning, early morning and the sun wasn't even up yet but Penelope lay awake, her arm draped over a slim waist, her body snuggled up behind another and her nose buried in stresses of black hair.
The blonde took a deep breath and smiled lazily. She wasn't scared anymore and now that she had experienced love-making with Bailey, she asked herself why she had been so stupid to be scared of it in the first place. Bailey was madly in love with her, Bailey was still here and Bailey wouldn't be leaving anytime soon.
Wow, lesbian sex. Wow. Penelope started to grin. She really should have more lesbian sex, much more and much more Bailey for that matter; the oracle definitely thinks it's a good idea. Her grin widened considerably as she saw the first rays of sunlight sift through the curtains. A kiss to a very naked shoulder followed, another to the neck, to the shoulder blade and then she heard a light grumble.
"Good morning."
Bailey buried her face in the pillow. "Good night," she mumbled but apparently Penelope didn't want to go back to sleep, she had different plans. "What'cha doin'?" The kisses continued softly and almost lulled Bailey back to sleep but then something happened her super SWAT-agent powers had not predicted.
A hand practically materialized directly between her legs. She jumped at the contact of course, startled out of her blissful doze. "Whoa!"
And there she was, on the floor with plush carpet pressing against her back and staring up at the ceiling. And after all that had happened, this was definitely not where she thought she would end up today.
Then Penelope's face appeared right above her, a mischievous grin plainly visible. "I'm…I'm so very sorry!" She whimpered but she so wasn't.
Bailey smiled an ironic smile up at her and sighed at her own predicament.
"I want to love you but I better not touch, I want to hold you but my senses tell me to stop, I want to kiss you but I want it too much," Penelope mumbled, not even aware she was mumbling at all.
"I'm poison?" Bailey looked down at the blonde head snuggling into her chest.
"No," Penelope said after a moment, her eyes almost closing. "You're intoxicating…"
Bailey nodded slowly. "Then what's got Alice Cooper to do with us?"
Penelope shrugged and snuggled into the warm embrace. "I just think that he and I have some things in common…"
The End