DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of these characters. No infringement is intended, I do it only for my sanity.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: This was written for December 12th of the Femslash Advent Calendar 2004.
DEDICATED: To my two wonderful friends, my beta reader Geonn and my proof reader Lewis, I thank you :)
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.
SPOILERS: Post 'Loss'.

Future Dance
By Debbie

It was a cold, blustery and unbelievably quiet December morning and Detectives Stabler and Benson of the New York Special Victim's Unit were both sitting deep in thought. As always over this last year, Elliot Stabler watched his partner with increasing concern. Not one for confiding her inner thoughts at the best of times, Olivia Benson had become increasingly withdrawn. He knew exactly what the problem was but was powerless to intervene.

Since the "loss" of ADA Alexandra Cabot 13 months previous, Olivia Benson had withdrawn deep inside her shell. Elliot had known the friendship his partner and the ADA had shared was a deep one but even he hadn't realized just how deep until it had been snatched away in the blink of an eye.

His love for and connection to his partner made him believe that was Olivia's problem too. He would lay money on his belief that the detective and Alex Cabot had never spoken out loud their now patently obvious feelings for each other. No-one who had been present on that dark night and witnessed the unspoken words of love, loss and regret that had flashed between the two women in a mere moment could refute the attachment those two shared. Yet, the regret he saw every day in his partner's expressive eyes told him it was so far unexpressed.

Right now, watching the deep hurt in those ebony eyes as Olivia Benson fingered the delicate necklace given her by Alex Cabot, Elliot knew that the only thing that would heal his friend was the return of the young blonde ADA.

Suddenly, his silent musings were broken by the shrill, insistent beep of his cell. Glancing to the now alert brunette opposite he grabbed up the annoying intruder.

"Stabler."

A soft female voice with a hint of a Scandinavian accent purred in his ear, "Detective Elliot Stabler?"

"Yeah."

"And is your delightful partner within ear-shot?"

"Yeah?"

Olivia Benson looked up, bemused at her partner's monosyllabic answers. Seeing the look of confusion on his face as he obviously listened to a one sided conversation on the other end of the line she raised an inquisitive eyebrow.

Elliot Stabler shrugged his shoulders and stood up, indicating the hallway he left the bemused brunette behind.

"So, have you gone somewhere private, Detective Stabler?" asked the mysterious woman.

Reining in his rising anger Elliot replied as calmly as he could, "Look I'm playing nice here, just tell me who you are and what the hell you want?"

The quiet female voice soothed huskily, "Now, now, Detective Stabler, I just want to give your friend and mine, the delectable Detective Benson, a nice Christmas surprise."

Despite his anger Elliot had to chuckle at the softly purred description of the battle-hardened detective and despite his reservations he was more than intrigued. It was after all the season of goodwill and anything that might cheer his good friend was worth investigating. He decided to listen just what the seductive voice had to say, urging: "Go on."

"My name is Ada Doppelgang and my specialty is surprise celebrations. I've been hired by a good friend of Olivia's to arrange a Christmas surprise for her. I need your help."

Elliot grinned at the absurdity of the situation, "I'm a police officer, surely you don't believe I'm going to play along with any stupid, not to say suspicious games, do you? What makes you think I'm going to trust you?"

Suddenly Elliot Stabler heard a voice he had thought that he might never hear again whisper a plea into his ear, "Oh, you can trust me Detective Stabler, I only have the very best interests of Detective Benson in my heart."

Feeling the color drain from his face Elliot spoke without thinking, "A..."

Immediately the Scandinavian burr returned as the obviously scared woman interrupted, "Don't Elliot, please. You just never know who's listening."

Elliot smiled sheepishly and looked up into the concerned eyes of his partner. Holding the phone tight to his ear so that Olivia couldn't hear the voice at the other end he said, "I know Ada, I know. Look I can't talk right now; Olivia's with me. Can you call back in half an hour? Please?"

Ada Doppelgang murmured, "I'll try," and disconnected instantly.

Turning to Olivia, Elliot explained, "That was Aunt Ada, Uncle Sam's taken a turn for the worse. I need to just... um... go call Kath and explain. Can you cover for me, say an hour?"

The brunette detective touched her partner gently on the arm and murmured, "Of course El, go and do what you've got to do."

As Elliot disappeared out the building a sudden thought hit the watching detective. She shouted after the retreating figure, "You don't have an Aunt Ada."


And so it was that on December 12th Elliot, Olivia and Casey Novak, SVU's current ADA, were all sitting in a high-class nightclub. Ostensibly out on a Christmas get-together Elliot and Casey knew it might be so much more for Olivia Benson.

Given the task of getting his withdrawn partner to this nightclub at a certain time, Elliot had recruited Casey to his task; telling her that Olivia was going to get a massive surprise that would cheer all of SVU in the process, and wasn't that worth its weight in gold.

Chatting quietly the three colleagues discussed their plans for the festive season. Her companions were not surprised to find that Detective Benson had offered to work all the shifts of the holiday season. Daring a glance between the two of them, Novak and Stabler shared a quiet chuckle. Olivia heard the chuckle but chose to ignore its meaning. Her friends would only try and tease her into enjoying herself and that was something she was struggling to do right now.

After a gorgeous meal, Elliot carefully let it slip that the entertainment tonight was a special show and that he had heard on the grapevine it was something not to be missed. Olivia glanced towards the stage and saw a subtly illuminated pole at its center. Smiling to herself she acknowledged the dancing would probably be a little exotic; grudgingly she admitted that Elliot had probably planned this evening with her in mind. She knew her partner was worried about her and that he thought she should find herself a date or two, with that in mind he'd probably arranged for her to see a few scantily clad females.

Smiling at her two companions, Olivia made a mental promise to enjoy herself and to enjoy the women on show; she had no intention however of finding a female date, one woman and one woman only could fill that need in her.

Suddenly the air was shattered by the ridiculous cell tone of ADA Novak. Wanting something different she insisted on being called by something similar to a cat's choir, supposedly 'Ragtime Blues'. Muttering into the phone it was obvious that Casey was being called to service a warrant. Disconnecting her phone with a sigh, she turned to Elliot, "Don't suppose you can take me down town, can you? I don't feel up to driving after that heady red and I see that you've been holding back on the beer. Please?"

Making a show of being annoyed, Elliot groaned. In truth he had no interest of refusing, this was the carefully planned out for Olivia's companions, allowing her to stay and enjoy in private what had been carefully planned by one Ada Doppelgang.

Shrugging his shoulders and giving his partner an apologetic smile he stood, "Come on then, let's get it over with so that we can get back here as soon as possible. Liv, there's no point in all of us missing this spectacular show, you stay and enjoy, we'll be back before you can say Jack Daniels."

Having already decided she was going to enjoy herself, Olivia had no intention of missing the show, she deserved a break. Nodding her acknowledgment she waved her friends off and sat back to wait, immediately deep in her own memories. So intent on her own thoughts, the brunette missed the high fives her colleagues gave each other as they exited the nightclub.


Suddenly the house lights dimmed and Olivia looked up to see the compère walk on stage. Smiling broadly he announced:

"Ladies and gentleman we have a very special show for you this evening. You've heard of Jenny Lind, the Swedish Nightingale, well we have, for your utmost pleasure, the wonderfully talented, Ada Doppelgang, the Scandinavian Polecreeper. You heard right, ladies and gentleman, Scandinavian Polecreeper, and if you've never seen a pole dance, prepare to be amazed."

Olivia smiled. Her opinion of pole dancers was very mixed but looking around at the obviously upmarket nightclub, she assumed that this pole dancer was very much removed from the 'almost prostitute' dancers she usually encountered. Her ears pricked up as the compère appeared to be walking towards her table.

"Before our show, ladies and gentleman, we have a special guest among us tonight. I've been asked by Miss Doppelgang herself to present this small gift to Detective Olivia Benson, one of our city's finest."

Bending forward he presented the stunned brunette with a long box enwrapped in an extravagant red bow from which she could see a small card protruding. Whispering, "Compliments of Miss Doppelgang, Ma'am," he then raised his voice to include the watching crowd, "Please enjoy our show."

Looking around the wary detective scanned the crowd. Expecting to see Elliot and Casey waving back at her, she was surprised to see nothing obviously untoward. Taking, for her, a massive leap into the unknown she opened the box. It was Christmas and she did need a good night out to take her mind off her problems. Inside the box was an exquisite single stem sterling rose resting on a mass of greenery. She pulled the card out of its envelope and read the words carefully. Handwritten in an insignificant bold block style were the words, "Please keep an open mind, my dear Liv."

As the music began to play and a troupe of minor dancers flooded the stage, Olivia Benson's stomach lurched. The last person to call her by those words was her much-missed colleague and friend, Alexandra Cabot.

Drifting off Olivia remembered. Even now Olivia marveled at the easy friendship that had developed between the two strong and independent women. Initially resisting the lure of the younger blonde counselor, Olivia had tried to maintain an icy demeanor around the woman. As time and cases passed, she had realized that beneath the tough icy outer shell of Assistant district attorney Alexandra Cabot, lay a young, vibrant, extremely intelligent young woman. A woman who could more than hold her own against the strong streetwise older cop. Accepting that their similarities far outweighed their differences the two women had developed a firm friendship.

After three years of building on that friendship Olivia had been convinced they were about to take their relationship to another degree. Their last evening together before Alex's untimely "death" had started off innocently enough in Olivia's apartment. They had spent a quiet evening reading, listening to music, and sharing the odd words of gossip and mutual story exchange. A few glasses of wine and the occasional foray to the kitchen and bathroom had resulted in a gradual lessening of the distance between their two bodies. At the end of the evening, seemingly without either of them noticing, the younger woman was lying on the couch with her head resting comfortably in the older woman's lap. And much to her surprise, Olivia was gently carding her fingers through the sleek blonde hair. Stopping her fingers suddenly as she realized just how erotic her movements had become, the brunette had been surprised to hear Alexandra murmur, "Don't stop on my account, my dear Liv. It's beautiful."

Long moments later, Olivia broke the magical spell that had arisen between them by leaning over and gently kissing the beautiful young woman's lips before pulling her up off the couch and directing her to the guest room. Nothing more was said that night but the two women knew that something beautiful had happened and that for them times were changing.

The next day life went to hell in a hand basket.

Startled from her musings by the return of the compère and the sound of a gentle drum roll, Olivia heard the announcement, "Detective Benson, your time has arrived. Especially for you, the Scandinavian Polecreeper, Miss Ada Doppelgang."

The opening bars of music stopped Olivia's heart with a lurch. Expecting some sort of modern dance beat she was shocked to hear a trumpet voluntary she hadn't heard in years. Edith Piaf had been a mainstay in the young Olivia's life, especially the haunting lyrics of this very song. Watching the stage carefully she saw a tall, willowy, redhead enter the stage to gentle applause. Walking majestically over to the waiting pole, she held the pole and began to sing in a clear gentle voice with a hint of an accent, more guttural than French, the detective assumed it was Scandinavian,

"Non, Rien De Rien, Non, Je Ne Regrette Rien
Ni Le Bien Qu'on M'a Fait,

Ni Le Mal Tout Ca M'est Bien Egal"

Mesmerized the watching brunette had a vague recollection that she knew that gait, yet the redhead was unrecognizable. Lost in the words of the song she again thought back to the last night she had heard the song. Alex Cabot had chosen Olivia's mothers CD, "The Unforgettable Edith Piaf" and programmed in for this track to play every other song. Eventually, driven crazy by the same words, Olivia had laughingly removed the offending CD, changing it to one of her own choice.

"Avec Mes Souvenirs J'ai Allume Le Feu
Mes Shagrins, Mes Plaisirs,
Je N'ai Plus Besoin D'eux "

The young woman sang and danced slowly, moving up and down the pole in a hypnotic, seductive rhythm. Leaning backwards she locked eyes with the watching detective. Olivia couldn't tell what color the eyes were but she felt them bore into her very being and a chill ran up her spine. Suddenly, the words were sung in their English translation; to her.

"No, absolutely nothing
No, I regret nothing
Because my life, because my joys - today
All this begins with you"

As soon as the applause had died down another song and dance began. The change in music style was so vast it was magnetic. From French of long ago to American of present; from trumpet voluntaries to gentle piano and drum riffles; from one Olivia CD to one Alexandra CD. Her heart lurched once more as she recognized the first strains of the first song of the CD she had replaced Edith Piaf with on that same night of months ago. The detective in Olivia Benson was dying to get out; she was convinced she had been set-up by Elliot, but couldn't begin to work out how he had this much knowledge about her last hours with the woman who still held a piece of her heart.

"Well I guess that I was lonely
That's why I called you on the phone
Cause in a moment of forgiveness
I didn't want to be alone"

The Indigo Girls' song rippled through her heart like a knife and tears sprang to her eyes. This was the song she played night after night after first losing Alex and still played on her bad days. The song that spoke the words she often repeated, 'when are you coming home?'

"Baby I woke up crying last night
Just to realize that you were gone
Has it been two long years without you
Tell me now
When are you gonna come home "

Working the pole like a professional, the woman continued to sing the words that meant so much to Olivia. Up on the stage this pole dance meant so much more than any of the demonstrations Olivia had seen before. She often called the pole dances of New York "a slow graceful fuck" but this woman was seducing the pole with her body movements and her words. It was as if the pole was her long lost lover, as if it was her very reason for being.

"And in a moment of forgiveness
You'd reach out and take my hand"

Slowly the woman twirled around the pole and held her hand out towards Olivia. Leaving go of the pole she began to walk towards the edge of the stage, locking eyes with the bewitched detective.

The gentle strains of another song struck up in the background but it was all Olivia could do to hear the music, so entranced was she by the approaching woman. For the first time seeing the redhead's eyes, she was surprised to see only a dull gray color. For some reason she had hoped to see crystal blue looking back at her. And yet, there was something tangible, something she could feel, something forgotten, radiating off the beautiful dancer.

Amazed, it struck her that the song was again one from that night. Olivia was unable to stop a smile crossing her features and was graced by a smile from the redhead. It was a smile that illuminated the gorgeous face of Ada Doppelgang, a smile that warmed Olivia's heart for the first time in months. Feeling guilty at the bolt of attraction that ripped through her, Olivia forgot all her thoughts as the tall, slim body came to sit astride her lap and began to sing especially for her.

Embrace me, my sweet embraceable you
Embrace me, you irreplaceable you

The body sitting in her lap felt just right as if it was meant to sit in her lap. Daring to hold the slim body she rested her hands on the waist of the singer and was surprised at the familiarity she experienced. Ada Doppelgang smiled and ran her finger down the cheek of Olivia.

"Don't be a naughty baby
Come to mama, come to mama do
My sweet embraceable you "

On a night of so many shocks already, the brunette was stunned to her core by the recognized feeling that coursed through her at such an innocent touch. The feeling was exactly the same as the one she had shared with Alex Cabot as they shared that sweet innocent kiss. Looking at the redhead with an inquisitive stare, Olivia's mind couldn't join the dots that were rolling around in her head.

Leaning forward as the instrumental section took over the tune, Ada Doppelgang smiled and whispered in Olivia's ear, "Trust me, Liv. Come upstairs now."

Gone was the guttural accent, replaced by a voice Olivia had thought she might never hear again. Stunned, Olivia stared at the young woman; it was Alexandra Cabot but not Alexandra Cabot. A band tightened across her chest and a name was wrought from deep inside, "A..."

Her words were devoured by a crushing kiss that was forceful but oh so gentle at the same time. With a fleeting look of real panic that only Olivia really saw, the redhead whispered once more, "Don't say it, Liv, please." And then pleadingly, "Upstairs now?"

Standing up, she began to sing once again and reached over to pluck the rose from its box. Holding her arms out she begged,

"I love all the many charms about you
Above all, I want my arms about you
Don't be a naughty baby.

And as Olivia began to rise, pulled by the delicious temptation of her lost love, the siren song that was Ada Doppelgang offered back the rose in exchange for a hand to lead her away.

"Come to mama, come to mama do
My sweet embraceable you "

Guiding Olivia towards the exit, Ada bowed gracefully to her audience and accepted the tumultuous applause of the entranced crowd. They knew they had just witnessed a special performance, but not one of them knew it was the first and only performance of Ada Doppelgang, and not one of them knew the importance of the magical evening to the two women now leaving the room.


Heart thumping against her chest wall painfully, Olivia Benson followed Ada Doppelgang to an upstairs room. Wanting desperately to know how this unrecognizable young woman came to have a voice so like Alexandra Cabot's it had fooled the astute detective for those heady seconds of a few moments ago, she watched every movement of the dancer minutely.

Ada Doppelgang opened the door and indicated for Olivia to follow her. She then spent anxious moments checking every room of the suite, listening to the phone, and finally glancing out of the closed blinds. As if satisfied she turned to the avidly watching woman and smiled a sheepish smile.

The redhead then turned towards a mirror and carefully removed a pair of contact lenses, before gently peeling away what appeared to be a latex nose. Entranced, Olivia could only stare and wait.

Slowly, Ada turned around, and time stood still for the stunned detective. Staring into her eyes were the now instantly recognizable clear blue eyes of her lost love, Alexandra Cabot. Bewildered, Olivia allowed her eyes to scan the woman in front of her carefully; beautiful deep eyes, strong firm nose, beautifully sculptured cheekbones, luscious lips that had been kissed just the once, and finally the slim, curved body. Apart from the out-of-place red hair this was definitely the missing ADA.

The two women continued to stare, neither certain of how to proceed now this moment had arrived. The air was alive with an electric charge and the magnetism was overpowering and yet, neither woman had the strength to break the spell.

Suddenly, despite the intensity of the situation, the detective's brain kicked into gear. The realization that 'Ada Doppelgang' equaled 'ADA look-alike' brought an almost hysterical chuckle to Olivia's throat. As if breaking the spell, the chuckle turned almost instantly into deep retching heaves from within her chest.

Opening her arms the brunette took a step towards the redhead, and as the redhead did the same thing, the two women finally met face to face in the center of the open lounge.

Reverently, Olivia touched the cheek of the woman she loved and drew her finger gently down to rest her hand on the trembling shoulder of Alex. Alex reached up and grasped the hand in her own, intertwining the fingers and clasping it to her chest. No words were spoken other than the multitude of regret and promises that passed between two sets of expressive eyes.

Still sobbing but now silently, matched by the tears that fell down Alex's fair face, Olivia Benson finally choked out a few words, "How? Why?"

Unable to continue, she halted her jumbled thought processes, and just whispered a plea, "Alex?"

Automatically knowing what she was being asked, as if the 13 months separation had never happened, Alexandra Cabot closed the distance between the two of them and rested her lips carefully on Olivia's. Slowly, majestically, the younger woman allowed her love, so long hidden, to be transcribed through the medium of her kiss.

The kiss that followed was all that a kiss should be: magical, memorable, erotic, sensual, loving, caring, friendly. Massaging Olivia's lips with her own, Alex shared her life breath with the woman she needed. Gradually feeling an answering pressure from the older woman.

As lips massaged lips, hands came into gentle play. Each woman caressed the others arms and backs, drawing strength from the feelings that were coursing between them. Gradually, Alex allowed her tongue to snake out and gently graze the lower lip of Olivia, parting the lips as she did so. Gasping when Olivia greedily accepted her tongue, Alex couldn't stop the moan that arose from deep in her throat. Suckling deeply on the detective's tongue, Alex was rewarded by an answering groan from Olivia.

Desperate for air, the two ladies were reluctant to stop, but gradually pulled apart to stare deep into each other's eyes. Alex was the first to speak. After so long away she was desperate to say what she should have said all those months ago. She traced her hand over Olivia's face and whispered, "I love you, Liv."

Olivia gasped at the words but her reply was instant and heartfelt, "And I love you, Alex."

The two women kissed deeply once more, assured of their love for one another, they both knew that things needed to be talked about. As one, they pulled apart. This time it was Olivia that made the first move, pulling Alex over to the couch and sitting down with Alex in her lap.

In that comfortable position the two women quietly filled each other in on the last 13 months of heartache and regret, relinquishing all their demons at the same time. They eventually quieted content in the knowledge that they still loved each other and that now they knew.

For a few moments they gently shared more kisses and caresses and meaningful reassurances of love and desire. Until, Olivia decided that she really needed to discuss the fact that until tonight Alex had been missing from her life for 13 months.

Gently turning Alex's face towards her own, she whispered, "What now, Alex? I can't let go again, I just can't."

The redhead smiled gently and once again caressed the face of the older woman, finally noticing the worry lines that seemed to have grown in the last year. It was obvious to the ex-ADA that the last year had caused Liv as many sleepless nights as it had caused herself. Her heart broke a little at what she still had to do. Steeling herself to impart her plans, she stroked the hand of her love and began to talk.

"Liv, I'm so sorry for what I have put you through, I just couldn't risk losing the people that mean so much to me; Mom, you, the guys, my friends. You saw what happened to that Federal agent and he had a wife and children, I just couldn't risk it. Listening to that tape, I heard my address, I heard Mom's address and I heard mention of a girlfriend. Then I was shot and lying in a hospital bed unconscious."

Pausing a moment to steal a chaste kiss, she murmured, "I knew you were there, you know; deep inside it registered that you and Elliot were allowed in to whisper goodnight." Then more strongly the young woman continued, "Anyway, once you had left, I was so alone with my thoughts that the tape message came back to me. And I now know I was being irrational but I thought 'girlfriend' related to you, something registered about jogging in the park, and I just couldn't risk losing you."

Olivia sighed, "But you did lose me, I did lose you, and God, Alex, I missed you so much. Don't go, please."

"Hon, I have to go again, I do. But I'll be back, I promise." Sobbing quietly, Alexandra Cabot made a pledge, "I promise you with everything I have I'll be back."

Pausing again, she took a moment just to look into the ebony eyes alive with love for her. Smiling she spoke the words she had come to say, "Listen. I've had time to burn this last 13 months and I've been trailing Valez and his cronies, with the assistance of the Feds I might add. Hammond grudgingly allowed me to take over Agent Donovon's files on Valez and I've tracked him to a safe house in San Antonio, Texas, near the border. All we need now is the next major shipment of drugs and we think we've got him."

Amazed Olivia could only stare at the news she was hearing. Smiling her encouragement she nodded for Alex to continue.

"If and when I can pinpoint the next shipment, the Feds are inclined to just try and catch him in the crossfire. The problem will come if Valez stays away, sending some of his packhorses to get the job done. But, my spies tell me that when the shipment is worth enough, Valez is so vain he likes to be involved, thinking he is above capture. What he maybe doesn't realize, at this point in time, is that the powers that be just want him out of the way. If that means death and another drug lord taking over, so be it. Investigations can then start again."

Olivia let out a chuckle; it was obvious Alex had the same tenacious ability that she had always had as an ADA. The two women had butt heads often enough over Alex expecting more from her detectives. Laughing out loud she pulled Alex to her for a hug, whispering, "Oh Alex, I hope you're right, but what then?"

Stealing another deep kiss from the lips Alexandra was reluctant to leave, the younger woman outlined her thoughts of the past few months, "Well tonight is part of that, I hope. I knew I was still in love with you, Liv, but I didn't know if you still wanted me. Hell, we never even said anything when we were together before, so I needed to be sure. Don't take this the wrong way because I've missed you like a passion but I have been sort of content in my life. I hoped that when the time was right I was coming home to you. And yet I was scared, what if you didn't want me. So I planned this little surprise, with Elliot's help."

Liv yelped and butted in, "You! You were Aunt Ada! Why, just wait till I get a hold of him, the runt."

Alex let out a glorious laugh that brightened the whole room and sent a shiver down Olivia's spine. "Yeah, I guess that was me. So, my little surprise was to test the water, and now, Liv, now I know. There is nothing in this world that will stop me coming home once I have my man. Nothing!"

Stroking the lips of the brunette gently she added shyly, "To you, Liv. If you'll have me?"

The question in the younger woman's eyes tore at the strong, hard detective's heart, "Oh Alex, of course I'll have you. This time, I'll let you go, but the next time you come home, you're staying with me forever, Alex, forever." A sob escaped the brunette's chest as she realized that indeed Alex was going to leave again, and soon she guessed.

As if drawn together by a string the two women kissed once again. Olivia, desperate to feel the woman she loved, pulled the slimmer woman on top of her body and held on as tight as she possibly could. It was as if she would never let go, as if Alex was the only thing keeping her life breath flowing.

Their kiss exploding into a passion that had been denied for so long, hands tore desperately at skin and clothing, tongues dueled in a frenzy, moans escaped and all sense of reality disappeared in their shared love. And yet again, as if an unspoken agreement had been brooked, the two women pulled apart. It was the younger woman who spoke the words they both felt, "Jeez Liv, I so want to make love with you right now, but if I do there is no way I could walk away from here and I must Liv, I just must. You do understand that, don't you?"

Groaning at the loss, Olivia grinned. "Yes, Hon, I do understand, now more than ever. But know, soon now, I will make love with you. I will." Then lifting the slighter woman effortlessly, she stood and placed Alex on the ground, taking the redhead into her arms for the last time that night. Swaying gently, Olivia began to hum the songs of earlier that night. After a few moments of completeness, she whispered in the redhead's ear, "Now come on, let's get this over with. The sooner you get back to wherever, the sooner you will come back to me."

They shared a last kiss that was slow and lingered, expressing all the love and desire it could to suffice the two want-to-be lovers till their expected reunion. Gently they pulled apart and murmured as one, "I love you."

Chuckling, Olivia asked, "So what now José?"

Joining in with the laughter, Ada Doppelgang replied, "Now I call my bodyguards and they take me back to wherever." Alex then turned and walked over to the phone.

Cuddling silently the two women had only 5 minutes to share before there was a gentle knock on the door and a voice calling, "Miss Doppelgang?"

Alex replied, "5 minutes please," and stood to walk over to the mirror. She carefully replaced the contact lenses and reapplied her latex nose, then turned back to stare into the eyes of her love. Memorizing every little nuance and the look in the gorgeous brown eyes she walked across the room to leave.

Olivia grabbed the redhead to her, saying, "Be safe and be back soon. Call me, please? Ok?"

Alex smiled and replied, "I will and I'll try, I promise. Love you, Liv."

Tears returning to her eyes Olivia stroked the hand that she was holding onto tightly and whispered, "Love you too but there is a couple of things you could do for me, you know?"

Pleased at the diversion, Alex laughed and asked, "Yeah, what?"

"Dance for me again."

"And?" prompted Alex.

"Lose the red hair, huh?"

Laughing uncontrollably, Alex turned to leave, the entwined hands ever so slowly letting go of each other, the two women said their silent good-byes and then the door closed leaving a silent apartment. Once more Olivia was left alone.


It was another 6 months before Alex's plan came to fruition. Caught in a the cross-fire between Government agents and two rival drug gangs, Valez, the drug baron that had kept Olivia Benson and Alexandra Cabot apart for nearly two years, died unceremoniously in the border town of Laredo, Texas. His passing went unnoticed by many but was celebrated by a heady few, not least the two women, one blonde and one brunette, who finally found their place in the world together.

The End

And here are the lyrics of the songs I have used in my piece.

Non, Je Ne Regrette Rien (By Edith Piaf)

Non, Rien De Rien,

Non, Je Ne Regrette Rien
Ni Le Bien Qu'on M'a Fait,
Ni Le Mal Tout Ca M'est Bien Egal

Non, Rien De Rien,
Non, Je Ne Regrette Rien
C'est Paye, Balaye, Oublie,
Je Me Fous Du Passe


Avec Mes Souvenirs J'ai Allume Le Feu
Mes Shagrins, Mes Plaisirs, Je N'ai Plus Besoin D'eux
Balaye Les Amours Avec Leurs Tremolos
Balaye Pour Toujours Je Reparas A Zero


Non, Rien De Rien, Non,
Je Ne Regrette Rien
Ni Le Bien Qu'on M'a Fait,
Ni Le Mal Tout Ca M'est Bien Egal

Non, Rien De Rien,
Non, Je Ne Regrette Rien
Car Ma Vie, Car Me Joies
Aujourd'hui Ca Commence Avec Toi


I Regret Nothing (Edith Piaf)

No, absolutely nothing
No, I regret nothing
Not the good that's been done to me
Not the bad, I don't care for all that


No, absolutely nothing
No, I regret nothing
It's paid, brushed away, forgotten

- I don't give a damn about the past

I've lit the fire with my memories
My sorrows, my joys, I don't need them anymore
I've brushed away old loves and their tremolos,
Brushed them away forever, I go back to zero


No, absolutely nothing
No, I regret nothing
Not the good that's been done to me
Not the bad, I don't care for all that


No, absolutely nothing
No, I regret nothing
Because my life, because my joys - today
All this begins with you


Moment Of Forgiveness (By The Indigo Girls)

Well I guess that I was lonely,
that's why I called you on the phone.
'Cause in a moment of forgiveness,
I didn't want to be alone.

And I guess that I was willin,
more than I ever was before.
'Cause in a moment of forgiveness,
I come a knockin at your door.

Baby I woke up cryin last night
just to realize that you were gone.
Has it been two long years without you?
When are you gonna come home?

I guess that I was hoping
that you'd finally understand,
and in a moment of forgiveness,
you'd reach out and take my hand.

Now baby I know you're not one
for bearing witness.
You told me that one wrong move
is gonna sell you out.
I see that you kept your word
And made it harder than it had to be.
Wish I could save you the trouble baby,
give you a little peace of mind.

Baby I woke up cryin last night
just to realize that you were gone.
Has it been two long years without you?
When are you gonna come home?

I guess that I was hoping
that you'd finally understand,
and in a moment of forgiveness,
you'd reach out and take my hand.

Embraceable You (By Ella Fitzgerald)

Embrace me, my sweet embraceable you
Embrace me, you irreplaceable you

Just one look at you
My heart grew tipsy in me
You and you alone
Bring out the Gypsy in me

I love all the many charms about you
Above all, I want my arms about you

Don't be a naughty baby
Come to mama, come to mama do
My sweet embraceable you

{instrumental interlude}

I love all the many charms about you
Above all, I want my arms about you
Don't be a naughty baby

Come to mama, come to mama do
My sweet embraceable you

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