DISCLAIMER: All main, recognized characters belong to William Broyles, Jr., John Sacret Young. and Warner Bros.
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.

101 Uses of Gauze
By Ann


The jeep hits yet another bump on this godforsaken road, but I guess it's better than rolling over some land mine. I sneak a peek at my passenger to find her sound asleep. How can she sleep on this rough terrain?

I stifle a laugh as I recall something K. C. once told me about one of her tricks. She said some bigwig Major was screwing the hell out of her, and she fell asleep right in the middle of it. If she can sleep during an encounter like that, then I'm sure this road is like a cradle rocking her to sleep or maybe it was the Major who rocked her to sleep. I know I certainly wouldn't mind an opportunity to try to keep her awake.

Several miles down the road, I manage to avoid the mother of all holes, but somehow the left front tire blows, and the jeep goes into a spin. I grip the steering wheel tightly and try to keep us from flipping over.

K. C. is obviously awake now as she shouts, "What the fuck is going on?"

I don't take the time to answer as the jeep leaves the road. We finally come to a stop between two huge trees. How we managed to avoid hitting either one of them head on is a mystery to me? I check myself out to be sure I'm not injured and then turn toward K. C. only to find her slumped against the front dash.

Shit. I quickly leap from the jeep and race to her side. Carefully, I lift her head as she begins to moan. She has a small cut on her forehead, and blood is slowly dripping from her nose. Reaching in the back of the jeep, I retrieve the first aid kit.

Leaning her head back, I lay surgical gauze on her wound and wad up another piece to stick up her nose which she doesn't take too kindly to.

K. C. slaps my hand away and says, "Damn it Colleen that hurts. Quit it. I've had nose bleeds before so you don't need to go jamming that stuff up it. Give it here, and I'll do it."

I remove my hand and allow her to treat the nosebleed as I turn my attention back to the cut which appears to be quite deep; good thing it's so small. Grabbing the peroxide, I daub some on the gauze and apply it to her cut.

K. C. immediately begins to protest. "Ow. What are you doing now? That stuff burns."

I continue applying the cleanser and reply, "It does not burn, but if you don't hold still, and I accidentally get this in your eye, I promise you it will burn like fire."

She instantly stills and becomes the model patient.

Now that K. C. has been properly taken care of, I survey the jeep's damage. The left front tire is damaged beyond repair and something large, maybe the axle, is no longer attached to the bottom of the jeep. In other words, we're screwed. We are going to have to wait here until another jeep passes by.

Walking back to the passenger side, I find K. C. with her head resting against the seat and her eyes closed. Even with gauze in her nose and a bandage on her forehead, she is breathtakingly beautiful.

I take just a minute to allow my eyes to drift to her tight top which enhances her gorgeous figure. Moving down, I focus on her perfect legs, her perfect bare legs. I love a woman in short shorts. I wonder how it would feel to be on top of her with those legs wrapped around my back. I close my eyes and let the image run free.

A snort pulls me from my erotic thoughts as K. C. gives me one of her sexy smiles. "Why Colleen, what put that goofy grin on your face? I've seen that same grin countless times on lovesick privates, but what has you in such a state?"

I turn ten shades of red before adamantly denying that I was thinking of anything.

K. C.'s good humor rapidly deteriorates when she finds out that we are stuck here until someone comes across us. The fact that I forgot to bring a base radio doesn't help matters either. Well, at least we have a jug of water.

Night falls as we try to get comfortable on the nearby ground. I swear if another stick pokes me in the ass I'm going to scream. Evidently, K. C. is not having any luck getting comfortable either as she pulls herself off the ground and moves to the back of the jeep.

I lie on my side and watch her take things from the back while she continually mutters, "Damn Lila. Why did I let her talk me into going to that fucking state dinner? I could be back in my bed with some good looking colonel or major or hell even by myself. But no, I have to be out here in the middle of nowhere with a broken down jeep and a headache the size of Montana."

She finally removes everything from the back and climbs up in the vacated area. Smiling, she closes her eyes.

Crap. Why didn't I think of that? Hmm, that area looks big enough for both of us. I think I'll test my theory out. Surely, K. C. will share. I'll just have to make sure I keep my hands to myself.

Rising, I walk to the jeep and push K. C. toward the front which causes her to open her eyes. "Hey, this is my spot. Go find your own."

I ignore her and crawl up beside her. Ah, this is much better than the ground.

Several hours later, I awaken partially paralyzed. What the hell? I can't move my arms. Did something bite me? I'm almost in a panic state until I realize my hands are tied. Oh my God, the VietCong! I didn't even think about them. How could we have been so careless? Where's K. C.? I quickly look around expecting to see enemy soldiers surrounding us, but all I see is K. C. sitting up next to me with a huge smirk.

I look at my hands and squint against the darkness. Gauze? I'm tied with gauze strips? Frantically, I try to free myself with no avail. Turning to K. C., I vehemently say, "Let me go right this minute. I mean it, K. C."

She just smiles and replies, "Colleen, did you know you talk in your sleep?"

Oh, shit.

K. C. begins to unbutton my shirt and explains, "Here's how it's going to work. You're going to lie there like a good girl and let me have my way with you. You're going to do exactly like I say. When I'm finished, then you can lie on top of me, and I promise you I will wrap you up so very tightly with these sexy legs."

Oh, fuck.

I start to protest when she leans down and kisses me senseless as her hand moves into my shirt. She tweaks my nipple, and I pray that we won't be found for quite some time.

Right then and there, I make a vow to always talk in my sleep and to always have an endless supply of gauze.

The End

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