DISCLAIMER: They are not mine, I'm just rubbing them together to see what happens. The story however, is mine...
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Happy birthday to Pandora007! This is a fic for her; she asked for it actually. Yay! This worked in my head, hopefully it works here as well.
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.
Green Eyed Monster
By The Raven
Andrea Sachs did not consider herself to be an especially jealous sort of woman, not really anyway. Of course she was human and no saint, but overall in her life she had not been plagued by the green eyed monster. Until now, that is.
Until now. And what the hell had happened to bring them to now?
Right now, Andy felt unreasonable, angry, confused, hurt and most of all, she felt jealous. It was an overwhelming experience and one she did not know how to react to as it was not so familiar to her.
Until now. Now, now, now! The pigeons and people in the park seemed to mock Andy as she walked. How could she have been so very stupid and put everything on the line this time? She would not survive this, nope. Not this time, the breakup would kill her just as surely as being hit by a bus would kill her.
She had been dating Miranda Priestly for about eighteen months and over that time they had gone through a lot. Miranda's divorce had become final, there had been the outing perpetrated by the cretins who ran Page Six. There had been a scare when Andy had been knocked unconscious at a riot that she had been covering as a reporter for The Mirror.
There had been all that and more, and then there had been the things that they were and did as a couple. Arguments, laughter, pleasure and pain and the adjustment that blending a middle-aged woman with two teenaged daughters with an almost thirty year old woman with no really serious responsibilities but an excellent ability to adapt to them as they came.
Andy sat down on a park bench as she considered her thoughts and feelings.
It has been a long day, hell it has been a long week, actually. Perhaps it had even been a long year, Andy could not think clearly anymore, everything felt like an angry blur of emotion and confusion.
And now this. This, this, this! Damn this!
She would not cry. She would not, never mind that it felt like her head was going to explode and that someone has ripped her heart out, salted it and shoved it roughly back in again, upside down. Never mind all of that.
Her makeup would run and really, the last thing she needed was to seem at all vulnerable right now as she was on her way to Runway to speak to her girlfriend, her lover and there had been talk about future wife as well.
Miranda had better be in the mood to receive her as there would be hell to pay if the other woman chose right now to give Andy the brush off. There was only so much that Andy was willing to put up with and Miranda had a lot of explaining to do, assuming that Andy was in the mood to listen by the time she got to the Elias Clarke building, that is.
How could this have happened? When had she let her guard down so far that this swift one-two blitz had caught her so unawares and now she was simply left gasping and confused and angry and hurt and so very jealous that it made her nauseous?
Rising to her feet once more, Andy continued her journey. She still had two blocks to go and the grey overcast skies suited her mood perfectly. New York did know how to play along sometimes. Not often, but sometimes. Right now Andy did not want even the weather to try to brighten her mood.
Wallowing in a mood did come with some rewards and Andy was determined to make the best of what she had to work with. Miranda may have been her girlfriend, but Miranda was also a formidable opponent and Andy would need to be ready.
Would she survive this? Just how far was she ready to go to challenge Miranda in this sort of situation anyway? And how would Miranda react? The older woman had not gotten to her position by being nice and that was what worried Andy. What if she was just a step along the way for Miranda? There had been no indication of this before now, but right now Andy knew all bets were off, how could things possibly be any different given the situation at hand?
"Shit!" Andy exclaimed out loud as she continued her journey to her possibly fateful destination.
One way or another they would all know soon enough and Andy was certainly ready for a fight if it came down to it. This very well could be the fight of a lifetime.
It had been a long day already and Miranda Priestly could feel a headache behind her eyes that would not let up. All that she really wanted was to go home, take a bath and have a nap. However, first she would need to survive the rest of this day, somehow.
Thankfully work was really the only source of stress for her these days. Things had settled down nicely with Andrea and for all intents and purposes, Miranda found herself living in domestic bliss. This was an unusual situation as normally she found domesticity to be anything but blissful.
"I don't need an appointment, Emily." Miranda recognised Andrea's voice, but not the tone her lover was using.
She did not think that she had ever heard Andrea use that tone before, what on earth was going on? Before she could think much further, Andrea stormed into the room and almost, but not quite slammed the office door closed. Certainly the door had never been closed with such force before.
"What's wrong?" Miranda asked, obviously something was troubling Andrea.
The younger woman had never barged into Miranda's life like this before and well, quite frankly Miranda had never seen Andrea quite so angry before, either. "What's going on?" Andrea asked, pulling up a letter sized envelope and pulling out something from it before she all but threw the something onto Miranda's desk.
"What is this?" Andrea demanded, her voice cold and full of unspoken accusations.
Miranda glanced down at what Andrea had thrown.
"Where did you get these?" Miranda asked, looking back up at Andrea.
Her girlfriend looked wild and unhinged. "The question, Miranda, is what are they?" Andrea hissed angrily. "Are you playing games with me, because if you are, I'll leave." The younger woman ground out through gritted teeth. "I am no one's fool." Andrea added.
"Well, that's debatable." Miranda said before she could think better of it.
Andrea looked momentarily hot and angry, but then she became icy. "If that's how you want to play it." Andrea murmured. "I deserve to know before I leave, I want to know what broke my heart." The brunette added and Miranda realised almost too late that she had better do something right, and she better do it right now.
"Andrea." Miranda said, picking up the photographs from her desk.
It was easy to see why her lover was so angry. If Miranda came upon something similar, say with Nate, or anyone, any man or woman, she would be incensed. "These are for the girls photo-albums." Miranda murmured, hoping that her gentler tone would soothe her distraught girlfriend.
She held up the pictures. They were intimate portraits of herself and the father of her children. Laughing, sitting close and presenting an image that was not that of ex-spouses or just friends. "You remember, we made some of you and me as well." Miranda said softly, reaching to rummage in a pile on her desk to pull up another envelope.
"My therapist said that it's important for the girls so I agreed. I wanted to give them something that showed them that their father and I had been happy. I don't hate the man, Andrea, but I love you." Miranda offered as she handed over the other envelope.
Miranda found that she was frightened but also upset at the same time. Was she really so difficult that Andrea could not have trusted her for long enough to ask some questions and find out the truth? At the same time Miranda felt the tight knot of angst in her abdomen make her feel woozy. As unreasonable as Andrea might be behaving, it was not without reason, trust or not.
The envelope was taken from Miranda's hands and she watched as Andrea glanced at the contents. "I remember this, it was a few weeks ago, though you never told me why." Andrea murmured, letting the pictures fall to Miranda's desk after a few more moments.
Miranda glanced over at the pictures. While the ones with her ex-husband had been warm and friendly, the ones with Andrea were intimate and loving. Miranda's trained eye could easily see this, but could Andrea see it?
"You have to start telling me things, Miranda. I can't handle finding out about stuff like this." Andrea murmured and wandered over to the window and looked out over the view beyond it. "It would have been so simple to tell me and it's not some State Secret or something." Andrea added, sounding tired and sad.
"I'll try." Miranda offered as she walked up behind her lover. "I am not used to sharing, I am used to doing." Miranda added as she stopped just behind Andrea.
The younger woman turned around to look at Miranda and the haunted look in her eyes was breathtaking. "I have to feel safe, Miranda, or I can't do this." Andrea murmured, her shoulders slumping.
"You are safe. You are, Andrea. I swear it." Miranda murmured softly, gathering Andrea up in her arms and holding her close for a long moment.
"I'm sorry." Andrea finally said into the soft fabric that encased Miranda's shoulder.
"It's okay. Your reaction was actually very restrained, which is why you are so right when you say that we need to talk more. In your situation I might have really overreacted and if we are to be married, well, we can't have too much of that." Miranda breathed into the luxurious dark hair that her face was buried in.
She received a squeeze in acknowledgement and then the planets and stars aligned again. They would be okay. This would be okay.
Now to set a wedding date. Miranda smiled, Emily's head was sure to explode when she was taxed with the arrangements. She would have to make sure Andrea was around to witness that.
"I love you." Andrea whispered softly and Miranda felt her heart leap in her chest. "I love you too." She murmured in reply and held Andrea even tighter.
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