DISCLAIMER: Law & Order: Special Victims Unit and its characters are the property of NBC and Dick Wolf.
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.
SERIES: Part of the Holiday Shorts series.
Holiday Short - St. Patrick's Day
By sunsetwriter
The detective and the former ADA made their way down the busy sidewalk toward Murphy's Irish Pub. Abbie was in town to interview a federal witness and had invited Olivia out for a beer to celebrate St. Patrick's Day.
They side-stepped to avoid running into a woman who was distracted by talking on a cell phone. Abbie reached over and punched Olivia in the arm and said, "Brunette one."
"Ow!" Surprised, Olivia stared at Abbie as she rubbed the spot on her arm. "What was that for?"
"I just spotted one."
"One what?"
"A lesbian."
Olivia frowned and shook her head. "So you slugged me? Remind me not to go with you to Lilith Fair."
Abbie scoffed. "I didn't 'slug' you, I barely punched you. Stop being such a wuss. It's a game."
"A game?"
"Yeah. You know, like the old 'spot the VW' game?"
Olivia shook her head again. "You have lost your mind. And how do you know she was a lesbian?" she asked as she turned to look at the woman they had passed. The most obvious characteristics she could distinguish on the retreating form were tight jeans and short hair. Turning back to Abbie, she asked, "Aren't you being a little stereotypical?"
"If I was going on looks alone, probably. But she was wearing a shirt that said 'Womyn Rule' – spelled with a 'Y'."
"So you cheated," Olivia said with a smirk as she reached to open the door to the pub. She stepped back to allow Abbie to enter, but a petite woman with short, spiky blonde hair exited just as Olivia opened the door. The woman very openly appraised Olivia from head to toe and then turned to Abbie and did the same. Breaking into a large grin at Abbie's arched eyebrow, the woman nodded a silent greeting and continued out the door.
Olivia cut her eyes over to Abbie just as she felt the punch in her arm. "Blonde one," the attorney said with laugh as she turned to watch the woman walk away. "Damn, too bad she's leaving," she said, then turned and brushed past the detective to enter the pub.
Not surprisingly, the place was crowded and boisterous. The two women made their way toward the back where it was a little quieter, and luckily found a table just being vacated. They quickly claimed the table and Olivia draped her leather jacket on the back of a chair. "I'm going to visit the restroom before I sit down. If the waitress comes by before I get back, order me a beer."
When the detective returned a few moments later, she found a pitcher with three beer mugs in the center of the table. The pitcher and two of the mugs were filled with green beer – even the foam on top was a pale green.
Olivia eyed the mug curiously as she took her seat across from Abbie. "What's this?"
"You said to order you a beer."
Olivia looked skeptical. "It's green."
Abbie gave her and incredulous look. "Ye-ah. It's St. Patrick's Day."
"So, you could have ordered me a Guinness. Who knows what that green stuff will do to us."
Abbie scoffed. "Just drink it, would you. I ordered a whole pitcher."
"I see that. And what's with the third mug? Did you invite the 'blonde one' to join us?"
A mischievous little grin appeared on Abbie's face. "As a matter of fact, I did." She looked over Olivia's shoulder and smiled. "And here she comes now."
Olivia took a sip of beer as she turned to look. She almost choked. For a fleeting moment she considered which would be more embarrassing – green beer shooting from her nose, or blowing light green foam all over anyone within a two-foot radius. She quickly swallowed to keep the beer moving in the right direction and then wiped the green foam off of her mouth as she watched Alex Cabot approach the table.
"Alex?" Olivia said as the ADA arrived tableside. "I thought you were stuck at the office."
Abbie smiled. "Hey, Cabot, glad you could make it." She cut her eyes briefly to Olivia who still seemed to be in shock at seeing the familiar blonde.
"Hey, you two." Alex smiled as she sat down in the empty chair. She looked at Olivia. "Dodson took the deal, so thankfully my workload just got a lot lighter. I was just finishing up when I got Abbie's call." She turned to Abbie. "So it was really perfect timing. I'm glad I got to catch up with you before you left town."
Abbie nodded. "Me too. I'm headed back to D.C. in the morning, but I couldn't let St. Patrick's Day slide by without an Irish toast." She looked again at Olivia, who was now eyeing her curiously. Abbie picked up the pitcher and started to pour the green liquid into the empty mug in front of Alex.
Alex placed her hand over her mug and said cautiously, "What in the name of God is that?"
Abbie rolled her eyes as Olivia snickered. "Oh for God's sake, it's green beer!" She looked back and forth between Alex and Olivia. "What part of St. Patrick's Day do you two not understand?"
Alex fixed Abbie with a glare. "It's an Irish pub, surely they have Guinness or something else Irish, don't they?"
Olivia snickered a little louder and Abbie shot her a look. Pushing Alex's hand away, Abbie filled the mug with green beer. "Like I told Benson, just drink it." Then she muttered under her breath. "Beer snobs."
Alex picked up the mug and looked at it. "Is this safe to drink?"
Abbie shook her head. "Y'all are like two peas in a pod. Green peas."
Olivia chuckled as she eyed her green beer. "Heh. This stuff may give a whole new meaning to 'green pee'."
Alex, who had finally decided to take a sip, stopped her mug mid way to her mouth. "That's it." She put the mug down and waved to the waitress. "Could we get a pitcher of Guinness over here please?"
Abbie scoffed and shook her head again. "Obviously you two don't get out enough. It's St. Patrick's Day."
Alex rolled her eyes and said emphatically. "Guinness is Irish."
Abbie shook her head, "But it's traditional to drink green beer and shake your shamrocks and all that stuff." She turned to Olivia as if asking for moral support. "You know, like Erin-go-braless, Lucky Charms and leprechauns." She smiled as if trying to encourage the other two women to join in her celebratory mood.
Alex stared for a moment and finally said, "Did you just say Erin-go-braless?"
Abbie smiled. "Makes it easier to shake your shamrocks." She picked up her mug. "So, time for an Irish toast." Alex and Olivia hesitantly picked up their mugs and looked expectantly at Abbie. She looked back at them and finally said, "Anybody know one?"
Olivia shook her head and rolled her eyes. "You're supposed to be the queen of green tonight."
Abbie gave her a forced smile. "Actually, Clan Carmichael is Scottish. I just like to support my Irish brethren, or sistren, as the case may be."
Alex frowned. "Is that even a word?"
Ignoring Alex, Abbie finally said, "OK, a toast. Here's to green beer – it's… magically delicious."
Olivia snorted just as the waitress showed up with a pitcher of Guinness and three new mugs. Alex quickly put down the mug she was holding.
"Oh, thank God. Real beer." She picked up her newly filled mug and looked at Olivia who did the same. Abbie rolled her eyes as she held onto her mug of green beer.
Olivia fixed her gaze on Alex. "How's this for a toast?" She raised her mug. "Here's to cheating, stealing, lying and drinking."
Abbie scoffed, "And you thought my toast was bad."
Olivia ignored her and continued. "If you cheat, may you cheat death; if you steal, may you steal a woman's heart; if you lie, may you lie beside the one you love; and if you drink, may you drink with me."
Alex smiled warmly at the detective. "I will so drink to that."
"Damn, Benson, I'm impressed," Abbie said as she looked at Olivia. Then she saw that Olivia only had eyes for Alex at the moment. Abbie turned to the ADA to see her returning Olivia's gaze. She looked back and forth between the two of them for a moment and then said under her breath, "This couldn't have been that easy." Then louder she said, "OK, is there something you two want to tell me?"
Olivia tore her eyes away from Alex and looked at Abbie. "What?"
Abbie chuckled. "Do you mean to tell me I orchestrated this little matchmaking session only to find out that you two have beat me to the punch?" Seeing the smiles of confirmation on both women's faces, Abbie nodded. "Like I said, two peas in a pod."
Looking over Abbie's shoulder to the bar, Olivia reached over and punched Abbie in the arm. "Speaking of punches – blonde one." At Abbie's startled look, Olivia directed her attention toward the bar with nod. The blonde woman they had seen when they came in was sitting at the bar. She raised a mug of green beer in a mock toast when Abbie turned around.
The attorney smiled. "Now there's a woman that knows it's St. Paddy's Day. If you'll excuse me, ladies," she said as she stood up and picked up her beer. "I think have a heart to steal." Then she turned and walked toward the bar.
Alex looked at Olivia and said, "I wonder if her name is Erin."
The End