DISCLAIMER: Don't own them, if I did do you really think the whole mess of wrongness that is GSR would ever have happened?
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.
Insomnia
By Rai
Part 1
Sara's POV
I crawl into my bed after a particularly gruelling shift, saying a silent prayer of thanks to whoever is listening that tonight is my night off. I shiver slightly as my skin makes contact with the cool sheets and I instinctively clutch the blankets to me. I stretch to my full length under the covers, enjoying the pleasant hum in my muscles, the remnants of a particularly vigorous workout.
I started working out over six months ago, right after I gave up drinking. Alcohol was my way of numbing the pain, of distorting the memories of particularly bad cases. At least, that's what I told myself, those were my excuses. In reality drinking made the misery worse, bringing all that I'd seen into horribly sharp focus and pulling it parallel with equally disturbing memories from my past. Each time I would just drink through the flash-backs, comforted by the inevitable unconsciousness I would find at the bottom of a bottle.
I roll over onto my stomach, enjoying the softness of my luxury cocoon. The bed and mattress are new, a little gift I gave myself to celebrate my 'half anniversary of sobriety'. Although it could hardly be described as a little gift, not after I got completely carried away buying ridiculously expensive pillows and sheets. But the most wonderful thing about sobering up was realising how much money I'd been wasting, and being able to put that money to good use.
The first thing I'd done with the cash was join a gym. I knew I wouldn't survive without a drink if I didn't have another way to vent my frustrations, and exercise seemed like the perfect outlet. Everyday after shift I work out until I'm exhausted, pounding the treadmill, swimming until my arms ache or going to town on an unsuspecting sparring partner in one of my martial arts classes.
I know people say I am simply substituting one addiction with another. They're right of course, but I never let that worry me. I haven't felt this good in my entire life, physically vitalised and mentally balanced. I've finally been able to sleep, a real sleep and not an alcohol induced coma. That's the reason I treated myself to such an incredible resting place, you really come to appreciate your bed when you finally start making it past the sofa or the bathroom floor.
I roll over onto my back and stare up at my ceiling, a small smile gracing my lips. My workout doesn't seem to have done the trick today, as I expected it wouldn't. Exercise is great for exorcising demons and releasing pent-up aggression but has no power over the other little distraction that's currently fuelling my insomnia. My eyelids slide shut as I finally give in to my thoughts of her…
Catherine Willows.
I once thought I despised her, I had myself convinced that our constant squabbling was down to her being a world-class bitch. The truth of the matter was I had such a huge amount of shit fighting for control of my mind that entertaining the idea that I had feelings for Catherine was incomprehensible. So I pushed her away. Fighting with her whether she was willing to or not. Putting up a wall of anger and indifference and ensuring that she loathed me so much that she would never try to tear it down.
A small laugh escapes me and I can't help grinning at the memory of our numerous arguments. Okay, so maybe part of the reason I pushed her buttons was to prevent her from getting too close but I have to admit having her raw, unchecked passion fired at me was an unbelievable turn-on. Whenever we'd fight I'd ride that wave of arousal to the nearest bar, searching for a faceless woman to scratch my itch. I never took them home, I never asked their names, I never let them kiss me. It was grotesque but I didn't care. I was on the slippery slope to destruction; there was no room for sentiment or conscience.
I feel a lot of guilt about it all now. Although there was always a mutual understanding, an unspoken acknowledgement of each other's desperation, I wish I could apologise to every woman I used. I haven't had sex for as long as I haven't had a drink, adopting celibacy as a kind of penance, hoping for eventual absolution. It's been a critical part of my rehabilitation, allowing me to stay focused on my goals, although the months of pent-up sexual frustration aren't making the situation with Catherine any easier.
As soon as Catherine found out about my drinking problem she nominated herself as 'my rock'. I tried in vain to push her away, feigning indifference, demanding solitude, but Catherine, stubborn as ever, refused to let me go. She made herself available for every little thing one friend could ask of another, yet gave me the space I needed to figure things out on my own. She'd schedule her nights off to coincide with mine and once she had Lindsay tucked up in bed we'd spend the whole night talking, finally getting to know one another.
I reach over and flick the switch on my bedside lamp, allowing the room to fall into darkness, save for the thin shaft of daylight blazing in from between my heavy curtains. I reach over and touch the right side of the bed, remembering the beauty of Catherine's sleeping form in that exact spot two weeks earlier. It was our night off but Lindsay had a sleepover at a friend's house so I invited Catherine to stay at my apartment. Unable to resist its charms we'd spent the night in my new bed, preferring it to the relatively small and uncomfortable sofa.
She'd admitted to me that night that she had been relieved when she found out about my addiction, knowing that it meant there was a chance we could put everything behind us. She apologise for her actions, expressing her regret at having dismissed me as a bitch and a snob. I absentmindedly touch the place on my cheek where her fingers had rested as she told me how grateful she was that we'd been given this second chance. It still blows me away. She's grateful? I'm so thankful I've seriously started contemplating the existence of God.
I let out half-hearted groan of frustration as memories of yesterday flood my mind yet again. I had spent the day in court, waiting to give evidence in a yet another trial, the one part of my job I detest. Being told I can't do my job by some spotty-faced defence attorney who can find no other way to dispute the evidence is not usually a big turn on for me. On this occasion, however, there was Catherine.
I hastily pull the blankets down to my waist, allowing the air to cool my suddenly flushed skin. She had looked stunning in a new charcoal suit, her hair styled naturally in loose curls. I bite my lip as I remember her skirt; fitted, with a modest split up each side.
My heart is racing as I let my fingers trace delicate patterns across my stomach, causing my muscles to twitch at the sensation. I feel myself moan as I remember Catherine's crossed legs as she sat beside me in the court. I kept having highly inappropriate visions of myself running my tongue up the inside of her leg, tearing holes in her panty hoes with my teeth.
I bring my hands up to lightly stroke my breasts, picturing the moment Catherine uncrossed then crossed her legs, revealing just enough to blow a hole in the panty hoes theory. My fingers finally reach my nipples, pinching and teasing, as I attempt to burn that flash of Catherine's suspender belt into my memory. How I'd managed to keep my emotions under check is beyond me and I finally let them go, allowing my mind to be flooded with her.
I imagine myself kissing Catherine in the restroom at the courthouse, my hands in her hair, pulling her into me roughly. I can hear her moaning into my kisses as I run my fingers over her stomach and over her thighs. I can see her so clearly as she hooks a leg around the back of my knee, encouraging me to lift her.
My hands dance across my own skin as I picture the scene, following the same path I wish my hands were taking across Catherine's body. I'm moaning freely now and there's a thin layer of perspiration covering my skin. I allow my right hand to dip below the blankets and play with my curls while the other hand massages my breast.
I imagine myself lifting Catherine, her legs wrapping around my waist and her hot centre being pushed flush against my stomach. A guttural moan escapes me as I slide my fingers into my own wetness, desperately seeking my swollen clit. I'm panting heavily as I picture myself pinning Catherine to the wall of the restroom. She's grinding herself against my stomach and I can feel the white heat starting to spread from my toes.
I squeeze my eyes shut, trying to hold on to coherent thought. I see myself push Catherine's soaked lace panties to the side and slam two fingers deep inside her. I hear Catherine's cry of pleasure as my own orgasm rips through me, and I takes me a couple of seconds to remember that I'm alone, screaming into an empty room.
The shrill call of my mobile telephone startles me and I pull my hand out of my wetness guiltily. I panic, grabbing the offending article from its place on my bedside table and answering it without checking caller I.D.
"Hello?" I manage, my breath still ragged.
"Sara?" My heart, which was already beating at and alarming rate, now tries to beat its way right out of my chest.
"Cath?" Oh god, I couldn't have made my voice sound that husky if I'd tried.
I am so busted.
Part 2
Catherine's POV
I finally slip into bed having dropped Lindsay off at school. It's been a very long day, and night, and I can't wait to let sleep take over my weary body. I close my eyes and my mind drifts off over the events of yesterday, inevitably focusing on Sara. I picture her in court, dressed in a black trouser suit and crisp white shirt. She had exuded such strength and intelligence on the stand that I felt intoxicated just watching her.
Sara had been viciously cross examined by the defence but gave an absolutely flawless performance to the obvious annoyance of the defendant and his council. I bury my head in my pillow and groan with latent embarrassment as I remember the moment I realised how wet I'd become during her testimony. I don't think I've blushed that hard in my entire life.
That had been the moment I had finally allowed myself to consider what had, in retrospect, been obvious for months. I know both Lindsay and my sister picked up on a change in my emotions, always fishing for an explanation for my good moods. I may have been able to give them one had I not managed to keep myself so firmly rooted in denial. There's no way to dismiss this anymore though, not after my reaction to her today. It's time to face facts; I have feelings for Sara Sidle.
I let out a little squeal of frustration into my pillow. Of all the people to start having feelings for why did it have to be her? We're just building a friendship, beginning to trust each other at last, and then I go and let myself fall for her. I can't believe I want Sara this badly and it's only just occurred to me.
I look at the clock. It's our night off tonight and Sara is coming over at six, a whole nine hours away. I grab the phone from its cradle and immediately slam it back down. There's no way I can ring her at this time in the morning without coming across as a totally crazy person. Grabbing the phone again, the desire to at least hear her voice overpowering all other fears, I punch in her number. The phone is answered on the third ring and I am greeted by laboured breathing and a gravely "Hello?"
I feel my heart drop to the pit of my stomach. She should be finished the gym and in bed right now, why is she breathing like that? "Sara?", I ask tentatively, not really trusting my own voice.
"Catherine?" It's a question but it's providing me with so many answers, ones I don't want.
"I'm so sorry Sara", I manage, hoping it sounds like embarrassment rather than gut wrenching agony. "If I'd known you had someone with you I would never have called." There was nothing but silence on the other end of the line so I return the phone gently to its cradle and let the tears flow freely down my face.
Part 3
Sara's POV
I hear the dial tone buzzing in my ear and I try desperately to fight through the post-orgasmic haze and make sense of what had just happened. Catherine had just caught me in the act of getting myself off, and the rising embarrassment threatened to overcome me. Although I know she can't read my mind I am wracked with guilt over the positively sinful thoughts that were the source of my frenzy.
I should never have answered the phone; I don't know what I was thinking! Slowly, my embarrassment begins to give way to a rising panic as I remember Catherine's words.
"If I'd known you had someone there with you I never would have called."
Oh god, she thinks she just interrupted me fucking someone. Oh, Shit. I grab my phone and hit the first speed-dial. After a few rings the answering machine kicks in.
"Catherine? Please pick up the phone. I think there's been a misunderstanding, there's nobody here with me." I hear a loud click as the phone is snatched up.
"You don't need to explain yourself to me Sara, you're entitled to a good time. I'm sorry I interrupted you and…whoever." The line went dead once again and my head starts to spin.
Okay, so Catherine thinks I've got someone here with me and she interrupted us getting hot and heavy. Why did she sound so hurt? Angry even? Does she think I've gone back to my old ways? That I'm drinking again?
My heart starts to race again, full-blown panic coursing through me. I dial Catherine's number again and wait for the tone.
"Catherine. I know what it must have sounded like but there's nobody here, I haven't…" I'm cut off by the sound of the phone being picked up again.
"Don't insult me, you think I don't know what a woman sounds like after she's come?" I stare at the phone, my mouth hanging open in shock. Not simply because of the implication of her words but because of the unmistakable jealousy in her voice. Again the phone crashes down but I'm dialling Catherine's number again in a heartbeat, waiting impatiently for the machine.
"Cath, please, I'm not going to insult you by telling you you're wrong. You're not. I just an incredible orgasm", I struggle to keep the need from my voice as I speak, "but there was nobody here but me. Please baby, you have to believe me." I'm cringing at the 'baby' slip when I hear another click, softer this time, the voice I hear is calmer but muffled by tears.
"Prove it."
"What?" I need her to repeat that, I think I'm going mad.
"Show me." She whispers, making me shiver. My throat is suddenly very dry as I croak my response.
"Show you what? I don't understand."
"Do it again, just like before." I fling the blankets off me and onto the floor, unable to stand the sudden rise in temperature.
"Cath…you don't mean…I mean…I can't."
"Why? We're friends aren't we? Girls share this sort of stuff don't they?" She was verging on hysterical now and there was an unmistakable edge of venom to her voice. "Were you thinking about someone you don't want me to know about? You don't have to worry, I've known about your crush on him for years."
I try to hold it in, I really do but I just can't stop the laughter bubbling up from my chest.
"You think this is funny?" She spits, clearly fuming.
"Yes, I do. I don't want to know who you think 'he' is but I can assure you that's not who I was thinking about."
"How can you be sure if you don't know who I'm talking about?" She shoots back, sounding triumphant.
"Because I was thinking about you." I say it without hesitation or regret, surprised at how easily the words slip from my lips. The silence was to be expected so I carry on talking. "I was thinking about yesterday, your legs in that skirt. I was so turned on when I realised you were wearing stockings it's a wonder I didn't fuck you right there with all those people watching." I hear her whimper and take it as my cue to continue.
"I couldn't stop thinking about you when I got into bed. I kept thinking about taking you up against the wall, your legs wrapped around me. God, you were so responsive Cath. You were grinding yourself against me, begging me to fuck you. You made me so wet I had to touch myself. I pictured myself fucking you senseless, it made me come so hard." My voice is barely above a whisper as I finish talking, making it impossible to miss the low groan on the other end of the line.
"Oh God, Sara…"
I bolt out of bed, throwing clothes on as fast as I can while still holding the phone. "Catherine? Listen, stay right where you are." I grab my keys and throw open the front door of my apartment. "And don't you dare touch yourself until I get there".
With that I hang up and sprint towards my truck.
Part 4
Sara's POV
The journey to Catherine's house doesn't register until I'm pulling into her driveway. I slam on the breaks to avoid rear-ending her car and practically throw myself out of my truck as soon as it's in park. I don't bother knocking, I know Lindsay is at school and the hormonal roller-coaster I'm currently riding leaves no room for the proper observation of manners.
"Catherine?!" I shout, not caring that may voice is laden with desperation and need. I bypass the rooms on the ground floor and head straight upstairs to her bedroom. The door is ajar and I push it open gently, my eyes immediately fixating on her figure. She's sitting on her bed, dressed for sleep in tiny black cotton shorts and matching vest. Her face is tear-stained, her sapphire eyes sparkling as she raises them to meet my gaze.
"Sara, I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have…" She begins to explain but I'm not listening as I stride across the room towards her. She's shocked by my sudden movement and stands just as I reach her, our bodies crashing together. I grab fistfuls of blonde hair as my mouth finally finds hers; cutting off anything else she may have wanted to say.
The kiss is bruising, as is my grip in her hair, giving her no opportunity to object or respond. I pull back, my eyes searching her face. Deer-in-headlights doesn't begin to describe the look on her face. I fight the urge to smirk; at least I got her attention.
"I've needed to do that since the moment I first laid eyes on you. I didn't mean it to be so abrupt. I know I should probably apologise but there's just no way I could ever be sorry for kissing you." My confession seems to snap her out of her stupor and my heart melts as she grabs the back of my neck, pulling my lips to hers.
As soon as she kisses me I'm lost. Her lips are so soft and yielding and when I slide my tongue into her welcoming mouth I moan right from my toes. My hands are roaming all over her body, trying to be everywhere at once, her back, her arms, her stomach. We moan in unison as my hands find her ass, kneading non too gently, pulling her flush against me. Good God, am I loving her choice of sleepwear.
Catherine is tugging at my jacket and I reluctantly surrender my hold on her so she can push it from my shoulders and onto the floor. She returns immediately to my blouse, tearing the offending garment from my body, sending a shower of buttons across the room. Her tongue is like liquid fire in my mouth and I'm loathed to pull away but she's wearing far too many clothes.
I pull her tank top over her head, unable to stop the growl that escapes me as I get my first look at her perfect breasts. I pull her flush against me again, letting the lace of my bra tease her aching nipples. She's panting heavily as I nip and kiss my way up her neck, swirling my tongue around the shell of her ear before taking the lobe into my mouth.
"Sara!" my name tears its way from her throat and I'm not prepared for the affect it has on me. Every ounce of self control I had flows from me unchecked, pooling at my feet. I slide my hands to the back of her thighs and she leans back a little, wrapping her legs around my waist as I lift her. The heat of her centre feels amazing against my bare stomach, only the thin material of her shorts preventing my otherwise inevitable spontaneous combustion.
I say a silent prayer of thanks for my current physical condition as I easily support the weight of Catherine's slight frame. She tears her mouth away from mine and throws her head back, giving me irresistible access to her breasts. I dip my head and swirl my tongue around her rock-hard nipple, causing her to gasp in approval. Wrapping my right arm around her waist for support I bring my left hand up to her other breast.
I take her nipple into my mouth for the first time, moaning hard at the sensation. Unable to be gentle I nip at the swollen nub, revelling in the feral cries my actions elicit from the angel in my arms. I switch breasts, giving the second the same attention as the first and I am rewarded with a roll of Catherine's hips. I pick up the pace of my onslaught, nipping sucking and kissing every inch of her chest. At that moment Catherine comes undone and my earlier fantasy is realised as she unabashedly grinds herself into my stomach, desperately seeking friction.
My eyes fly open as I feel her wetness against my skin, her shorts no longer able to withstand the flood of her want. I gaze up at her, head thrown back, panting and moaning with each thrust of her hips. Her eyes are squeezed shut and she's biting her bottom lip, perspiration lies on her skin like dew, making her body glow. I've never see anything so incredibly beautiful in my life and the rush of emotions it sends pulsing through my body almost makes my knees buckle.
I find Catherine's lips again and she pushes her tongue into my mouth hungrily, exploring me with languid strokes. I carry her over to her dressing table, sending everything on it crashing to the floor with one sweep of my free arm. I pull Catherine's shorts down over her perfect ass, unable to resist holding it with both hands as I gently set her down. I take a step backwards, pulling her now saturated shorts from her body. I gaze at her; legs spread, lips bruised, waiting for me.
"Catherine?" My eyes search her face, needing to be sure. She groans and grabs the waistband of my jeans, pulling me towards her before growling in my ear.
"Fuck me baby, please. I'm so wet for you."
Her words possess me and with the floodgates open I let myself go, pushing two fingers into her hard and deep. She screams my name as I enter her and I brace myself against the flood of white hot lust that threatens to overcome me. Somewhere deep in my mind a little voice is telling me to savour this, to slow down but it has no hope of being heard over Catherine's screams.
I put my whole body behind each trust, causing the table to groan and creak and slam noisily against the wall. I'm suddenly very glad Catherine's house is detached although with the noise we're making we'd be lucky not to alert her entire street. I brush her clit lightly with my thumb causing Catherine to sob.
"Please…Sara…please." Her pleas are like music to my ears, she's begging me for release and there's no way I'm going to deny her. I curl my fingers and apply pressure with my thumb, unable to stop the smile forming on my face as I feel her walls clench around my fingers. I thrust into her with everything I have and she screams my name as her orgasm overtakes her.
Her pleasure rushes over my hand as I continue my ministrations at a slower pace, wringing every last drop of climax from her body. Finally her body stills and I wrap my free arm around her waist, pulling her into my embrace.
"Beautiful." I whisper, "So beautiful." She shudders suddenly and I feel a dampness against my shoulder. When I pull back to look at her I see that she's crying and my heart breaks. I did that to her, I broke her. I hate myself.
"Cath? Baby? Please don't cry, please." I slowly pull my fingers from her and she lets out a small cry. "Oh God, Catherine. I'm so sorry." I feel the tears stinging my own eyes as I gather her in my arms and carry her over to the bed. I kiss her tears away with butterfly kisses as I lay down next to her, being careful not to touch her, unsure if it would be welcome.
"I am so sorry, Catherine. I didn't mean to get so carried away. I want you so much I lost all control of myself." She finally opens her eyes, a mixture of confusion and amusement dancing across the blue orbs. She pulls me on top of her and lets out a shuddering breath; I can feel her body quivering with aftershocks.
"What on earth do you suppose you have to be sorry about?" She asks, finally finding her voice. "Did you hear me complaining? I remember begging you at one point but I certainly wasn't begging you to stop." I pull back to look in her eyes, looking for any sign that she isn't being truthful.
"Are you sure I didn't hurt you?" I ask, my voice dripping with uncertainty. She laughs and the sexiest grin I've ever seen spreads across her face. Her eyes darken with desire as they stare into mine and I fight the moan that threatens to escape me as her tongue slides out to moisten her lips.
"Oh, you definitely hurt me." She husks, "I'm going to be able to feel you inside me for a week." Her eyes glaze over and I know she's remembering. I swallow hard, trying to prevent my hormones from raging at her words. "Never in my life has someone fucked me the way you just did. Jesus Sara, I always knew you had a wild side, all that mystery had to be concealing something, but…wow, I never imagined." She's grinning now and I relax a little, a blush creeping over my cheeks.
"I aim to please." I whisper, kissing her forehead and running my fingers through her damp hair.
"Aim? God Sidle, you have no idea!" She pulls me in for a kiss, it's the first gentle kiss we've shared and I pour as much emotion into it as possible. She sighs deeply and pulls back a slight look of concern marring the look of bliss on her beautiful face.
"What is it?" I ask softly kissing her lips again.
"Nothing. It's nothing…just…" She breaks off draping her arm across her eyes and groaning in frustration. I nuzzle her neck, kissing the velvety skin, soothing it with my tongue.
"I'm nervous." She admits, "How am I supposed to follow that?" I raise my head to look at her incredulously.
"What are you talking about, you crazy woman?"
"I've been with a few women but it was nothing like that. Men are so much simpler, it doesn't take any real skill." She lets out a breath slowly and locks eyes with me. "I don't know if I can please you like that Sara, I'm worried I won't be able to…" I silence her madness with my lips, the mere implication of her words reminding me just how aroused I am. I look at her again and my heart swells.
"You're amazing you know that?" She looks doubtful so I continue, "You must know the effect you have on me, after what we just did how could you not? You make me crazy Cath, I've never lost control like that, ever. If you do reciprocate I can assure you the only problem you'll have will be getting me to survive more than five seconds of your touch before I explode." She seems appeased by this but then suddenly frowns.
"If? Don't you want me to?" She looks deadly serious and I can't help but laugh.
"I think I must have done some damage when I was slamming you against the wall earlier, you've clearly gone mad." She sticks her tongue out at me and I capture it between my lips, suckling it for a moment. "Every shooting star I've seen since we met the wish has been the same. I want you. I want you in all the worst ways. But what just happened between us doesn't come with strings. I needed to show you, to express the strength of my feelings for you. You don't need to feel obliged to repay me."
"And what about my feelings for you?" She's tracing patterns across the small of my back as she speaks, "Granted, one of the feelings I've been having was a desire to feel you inside me, which I think we've just about covered." I grin down at her, loving her playful side. "But there a few more I need to discuss with you before I can let you out of this bed."
"Oh, yeah?" I ask, playing along. She rolls us over so she's on top and sits up, straddling my hips.
"Oh yes, definitely." She wiggles her eyebrows at me and I just know I'm grinning like a moron. "Firstly, I feel like I really gotta see you naked. Come here." I sit up and she slips her hands around my back, undoing my bra. She slides my bra down my arms then pushes me back onto my elbows, taking in the view. I watch as her pupils dilate and she licks her suddenly dry lips. I feel my nipples harden under her gaze and I moan softly at the sensation.
She kisses me, it's soft and slow, and it reignites fires right though my body. She reaches between us and pops the buttons of my flies one at a time, painfully slowly. She breaks our kiss and stands at the foot of the bed. She motions for me to lift my hips and I watch her intently as she pulls my jeans down. She gasps and I can't help but laugh at the shocked look she throws me.
"Miss Sidle! I'm surprised at you. I thought you were a lady." I laugh again as she removes my jeans completely.
"What can I say? I got dressed in kind of a hurry." She makes a tut-tut sound with her tongue and rakes her eyes across my now naked form.
"It's a good job you have such an incredible body, otherwise I may have had to punish you for being so naughty." Her voice was so sexy when she uttered that last word that I immediately started to think of other naughty things I could do that might get me punished. She crawls up the bed towards me, appraising my body from under heavily lidded eyes. I feel like her prey and it makes me squirm in anticipation.
She hovers above me, her breasts temptingly close. Slowly, she lowers her body down on top of mine, full skin-to-skin contact. We kiss, swallowing each others moans, revelling in this new sensation. She breaks away, kissing along my jaw line and down my neck, swirling her tongue in the hollow at the base of my throat. She sits up, straddling my waist again. I have no control of the guttural moan that spills out of me as she slides both hands up my stomach to cup my breasts.
"You know, I always wondered if you were a moaner, Sidle." Her voice is unbelievably husky and it's making me shiver. "Guess I can cross that off my list." She begins to massage my breasts gently, carefully avoiding my nipples. I arch my back, straining towards her hands, desperately seeking more contact.
"I know you think about fucking me when you touch yourself." My eyes snap open. She's watching her hands as they continue their torturous movements. "Do you ever think about me touching you." My mouth opens but I can't seem to form words. She brushes her fingertips over both of my nipples, startling me from my stupor.
"Ugh…Yes!" I moan loudly, aching towards her again. She sucks an index finger into her mouth, followed by the other.
"Yes what?" She whispers, circling my areola with her moistened finger tips.
"I…ugh…think about you…touching me."
"When?" Oh god she's going to kill me.
"When I…oh Jesus…when I touch myself. I think about you and it makes me so wet." My eyes never leave her as she bends her head and takes a nipple in her mouth and finally takes the other between her fingers. The sounds I'm making are highly undignified but as Catherine's hot mouth moves from one breast to the other I can't seem to find the will to care.
"Do you imagine me doing this?" She flicks her tongue over the now swollen nub as she speaks.
"Yes!" I hiss, truthfully.
"What else?"
"Your hands."
"Where? Here?" She moves her hands across my stomach and I nod, temporarily muted. She shifts positions, moving her legs from either side of my waist and kneeling between my legs.
"Here?" She runs a hand up each of my legs, from ankle to hip and back again. Her feather-light touches send sparks of pleasure to my centre and my legs spread of their own accord. Her hands are drawn immediately to the newly exposed skin on my inner thighs, causing my hips to buck.
"When you fantasise, is it just my hands on you?" Her voice is so quiet but I hear every word, each one pushing me closer to the edge.
"Your mouth…I…" She relents and begins kissing, nipping and licking the skin on the inside of my thighs and the tops of my legs.
"Please baby…oh God."
"What? Tell me what you need, I'll do whatever you ask." I growl at her words, clenching my teeth.
"Fingers…inside. I need you inside." She does as promised and slides two fingers inside me easily, causing me to melt into the bed. She kisses me slowly, thoroughly, and just when I think I can't take it anymore she starts up a slow, deep rhythm with her fingers.
"Catherine…so good."
"You're beautiful, I need you to know that." She brings her thumb to my clit and I feel every bit as beautiful as she claims. "I need you to know that I miss you every second we're apart. I think about you all the time; your eyes, your smile, I can't get you out of my head." She punctuates each word with a curl of her fingers and it's causing my head to swim.
"I respect your feelings for me, whatever their extent, but I need you to know that I want you, I want this, over and over. I want you to take me, in all the different ways you've imagined, again and again." I can't believe the things she saying to me but my body is certainly reacting. I feel the rumble of my orgasm building and I grab handfuls of bedding, hanging on for dear life.
"Sara? Look at me. Baby, look at me please." I force my eyes open and manage to focus on hers as her fingers quicken their pace.
"I love you Sara." My eyes roll back in my head as I fall over the edge. Fire burns a path along every nerve ending as my body arches completely of the bed. I know I'm screaming, I feel it clawing at my throat, but all I hear is Catherine's voice and those four words.
The End