DISCLAIMER: Bad Girls is the property of Shed productions, this story depicts a loving/sexual relationship between women...okay, disclaimer done.

Internal Affairs
By Sarah


Nikki closed the door on her sleeping daughter, marvelling once again how beautiful the child was. Making her way downstairs she was greeted by Max. “You’ve done a wonderful job looking after Gracie Max, I don’t know how I could ever thank you.” she said while crouching down to sit on the third step.

“I didn’t do it all on my own I had help, especially since the accident” Max said joining her sister on the steps.

“How did you manage when that happened ... you said you had to stay in hospital for quite some time and that Terry went to the States before you were discharged.” Nikki was a little confused about it all now that she thought about it. How had Max coped.

“My girlfriend helped out.”

“Girlfriend?” Max hadn’t mentioned anything about meeting someone.

“Yeah, while I was in hospital she came to visit me every day, told me all that was going on, helped me regain my memory and somewhere along the line we fell in love. Terry was desperate to go off to the States so Gracie went to live with her till I was better enough to come out of Hospital and we could both look after her.”

Nikki listened carefully but couldn’t help but feel her anger starting to grow. “You and Terry left my daughter in the care of someone I don’t even know just so she and Mark could go on their travels. What if this woman had been some sicko with a thing for children, what if she had been a ... a ... a ...”

“Careful there Nikki that’s the woman I love your talking about, beside she’s not a sicko and Gracie likes her, I wouldn’t of agreed to it if Gracie didn’t like her, so just relax. And besides you do know her” taking a deep breath Max turned to face Nikki straight on, now was the difficult bit, how do you tell your sister that your in love with her ex ...

“Well who is she?” Nikki said a little impatiently.

You just do it, Max decided. “It’s Trisha ... Trish Harris”

Nikki just sat on the step looking at Max waiting for her to continue. It was a trick she had learnt when they were kids growing up, if she waited long enough she knew Max would explain everything to her she just had to be patient. She couldn’t help but think though that it had to have started before Nikki had gone on assignment. Remembering that day when Trish had come in to visit her while she was Larkhall and had told her that there was someone else, she remembered the pain and anguish she had felt that night and how it had led to her thinking about her feelings for Helen.

Max saw a fleeting look of pain cross Nikki’s face and hurried to explain. “I was in hospital and she came to see me every day, staying as long as she could. She knew you were still inside and that Terry had Mark so she just wanted to make sure I was alright. I don’t think I would have got through it with out her Nikki. I was quite depressed, no one was telling me anything about what had happened, and I found myself talking to her about it. She wasn’t the doctors and she wasn’t family ... I don’t know if this is even making sense.” Max said and hung her head.

Hearing the pain in her sisters voice snapped Nikki out of her reverie and putting an arm around her shoulders she pulled her into a quick hug. “It makes perfect sense, she was there when you needed her. Just answer me one thing Max”

“Anything Nikki?”

“Were you the one she dumped me for?”

“No ... no she had already spilt from you when the accident happened. I don’t know who that other woman was and I never asked but it wasn’t me Nikki I swear” Max beseeched, wanting Nikki to believe her.

Smiling Nikki went to stand “Good, then I’m happy for you and Trish and I’m glad you found someone to help you get over the accident. Now lets get this take away packed up, it’s starting to stink the house out”

Twenty minutes later the washing up was finished and the bin bag had been taken out. They were both sitting down to drink a mug of tea when Max’s mobile rang. Looking at the display she said, “It’s Trish”

“I’ll leave you to it. Think I’ll just use the phone myself” and with that she got up to leave. Hearing Max answer with such love in her voice Nikki smiled, happy that her sister had found happiness. Closing the door to the lounge she made her way over to the phone and dialled Helen’s number. After getting nothing but the engaged signal after the fourth time of trying she went back in to the lounge with a puzzled frown on her face. Max was still on the phone to Trish but noticed Nikki’s entrance.

“Hang on a sec love” she said into the mouthpiece. “Problems?” she asked Nikki.

“No answer just an engaged sign.”

“Maybe she’s on the phone”

“Maybe, but I tried four times over the last fifteen minutes and no change. How long do you stay on the phone for crying out loud” she said somewhat rhetorically.

Looking at the mobile in her hand and hearing Trish’s voice on the other end asking what was going on Max replied “Well some people talk for longer that fifteen minutes. Look if your that worried why don’t you take a drive, go round there, see for yourself that she’s alright”

Thinking for just a moment Nikki came to a decision. “Yeah I think I will. Sorry I interrupted your conversation I’ll see you later ok?”

“Yeah sure” Max said waving Nikki off then going back to her conversation with Trish.

Parking her MG just down the road from Helen’s flat, Nikki sat staring at the house where she had spent a wondrous night just a few short months ago. ‘Were they ever going to get those happy times back again’ she wondered before getting out of the car and making her way over to the door.

After knocking she could hear someone stumbling around inside and then the door was opened, and Helen was standing in front of her and for one unguarded moment Nikki saw the beginnings of smile form on Helen’s face. But then she seemed to remember what had happened and the shutters came down.

“What do you want Agent Wade, in fact don‘t bother I don‘t want to know” and with that Helen closed the door.

After knocking again but getting no joy Nikki leant back against the door and slid down till she was sat on the stoop. “Helen, please, I had to see you, to see if you were all right, to tell you it’s going to be alright. Helen please. I didn’t want to lie to you, but when I started on the investigation I didn’t know how it was going to end I didn’t know that I was going to fall in love with you. Helen please. I love you Helen, please, please forgive me. Please” and with one last knock on the door, Nikki slumped forward, hugging her knees, with her back pressed against the door.

“How can I ever forgive you Nikki” Helen said through the door after a few minutes. Nikki’s head snapped up and she stared hard through the door. “You lied to me Nikki, everything was a lie”

“No Helen, I never lied to you, I promise. Never once did I lie to you.”

“A lie by omission is still a lie Nikki”

“Ok yes, I never told you everything about me, but I never lied about the important things Helen. I never lied about loving you, about wanting to spend the rest of my life with you. You’ve got to believe me Helen. I never lied about loving you. I loved you. I still and will forever love you.” Bringing her hand up to touch the door at where she thought Helen was sat, Nikki said one last time before falling quiet. “I love you Helen”

Quietly on the inside of the door Helen placed her palm on the door, unconsciously copying Nikki’s action. Staying quiet she sat there contemplating what Nikki had said. Thinking about everything that had ever happened between them, all they had done and said. Looking up her stairs to where her bedroom was she remembered everything that had happened that night a couple of months ago and how the future had been so full of promise. Did she really want to throw that all away. Sighing she turned back to the door and stared at it as if she could see through to where Nikki was sat and thought about what she was going to do.


Nikki sat there waiting ... hoping for Helen to open the door. When after 20 minutes the door still hadn’t opened Nikki jumped up, muttering “Fuck this for a lark” and reached into her jacket pocket. Pulling out her old tool pocket she slid the long thin tools from their sheath and expertly set about opening the lock on the door.

Hearing the muffled obscenity Helen moved away from the door wondering what on earth was happening, when the door swung open to reveal Nikki standing on the other side.

“What the fuck” Helen gasped at the smiling Nikki who moved slowly into her house.

“Amazing what you can learn in prison isn’t it?” Nikki joked putting her picks back where she got them from before striding over to a still shocked Helen. “Ever since I have known you Helen Stewart there has always been something stopping us from talking properly. Well not this time, this time we’re going to talk about this without the chance of being caught out by a PO, or without bars in the way. Now if I remember rightly the lounge is this way.” and with that Nikki walked into the lounge leaving a gob smacked Helen in her hall with the front door wide open.

Gaining her equilibrium back Helen shut her front door before following. “How did you do that?” she asked still stunned.

Shrugging Nikki replied, “Came in handy when I was an investigative reporter in the States.” Taking her coat off Nikki hung it over the arm of the sofa and turned to face Helen. “I’m sorry.” she said earnestly looking into Helen’s eyes. “I should never of let it get that far, I didn’t want to hurt you.”

“Well you did” Helen said. Looking down she seemed to find something on her carpet of great interest before looking back up into the eyes of the quiet woman in front of her. “But I’m not sorry” she said before walking towards Nikki and taking her into her arms for a long hug.

Letting out a relieved sigh Nikki wrapped her arms around Helen. “I’ll make it up to you I promise” she whispered into Helens hair.

Pulling back Helen skimmed her fingers along Nikki’s smooth cheek. “Yes you will” she said before pulling Nikki’s head down so that their soft lips could meet.

After a few minutes of passionately kissing Nikki softly kissed her way down Helen’s neck. She had to slow this down, things were going to fast and she didn’t want to stuff things up again before they were fully fixed. Lightly nipping Helen’s ear lobe before soothingly kissing it better Nikki whispered “I better go before things go too far.”

Moaning Helen arched her neck allowing for greater access and responded “The only place your going Nikki Wade is up those stairs” and with that she guided Nikki’s lips back to hers for a quick kiss before grabbing her hand and leading her up the stairs.

Monday morning came around far too quickly Nikki thought as she silently untangled herself from Helen. Since Friday night when she had arrived they hadn’t left Helens house ... they hadn’t left Helens’ bed apart from the few times they had needed to eat, and the time they had decided that they would go out for lunch but that didn’t count as they had only made is as far as the shower.

Glancing back at the woman still sleeping in the bed Nikki sighed wishing she could stay here for the rest of time with Helen but the real world was intruding and she had responsibilities, one of which she had ignored all weekend and just hoped that she would forgive her for that.

Quietly gathering her clothes she went downstairs to get dressed and write Helen a note before she quietly stole out of the house and made her way back to her house to change before going into the office with a smirking Max.

It had been four weeks since Helen had been suspended from the Prison service and unbelievably they had been the happiest times of her life, she thought as she lay in the garden watching mother and daughter play badminton at the bottom end of the lawn.

Remembering back to that Monday morning when she had woken to find Nikki gone Helen smiled as she thought about the dread that had fallen over her until she had come down the stairs and found her note explaining that she had had to go into work to put in her request for holiday time owed so they could spend as much time together as they could. Turned out Nikki had six weeks owing her so she had taken them all at once.

They had spent the first week getting to know one another outside of the prison environment. During the second week Nikki had brought Gracie over and Helen had fallen in love with the little girl instantly. She was so like Nikki it was uncanny and hard to believe that Nikki wasn’t her birth mother. When Helen had said this after they had put the tired little girl to bed one night, Nikki had broken down into tears and Helen had held her, quietly soothing her as Nikki had finally given into the grief of losing her sister.

Gradually over the next couple of weeks Nikki and Gracie had slowly come to move in to Helens house and they were now all living together. They had been the happiest times she could remember in a long time, and she was dreading the end of them. But she knew that they would end soon, especially after receiving the letter form the home office today stating that although she was not going to be charged by the CPS, they had read all the reports on the matter and were formally asking for her resignation from the Prison Service on the grounds of misconduct. She was a little upset that it had come to this but she was also relieved. It was over. She and Nikki could finally put it all behind them and get on with their lives.

Just at that moment a shuttlecock landed in her lap.

“Hey Helen you just going to sit there all day or are you going to get up off your lazy arse and come and play” Nikki teased.

Gracie started to giggle at the mock look of outrage that crossed Helens face. “Oh mommy your going to get it now”

Getting up swiftly Helen grabbed Gracie’s hand. “Oooh Wade that’s it. Come on Gracie lets get her” and with that they started chasing Nikki around the garden.

Max and Mich stood at the front door and pressed the door bell again.

“Maybe their not in, we should of rang first.” Mich said stepping away from the front door and making her way back to the car. Just then a high pitched giggle came from the direction of the back garden. Looking at each other they both smiled before making their way quietly to the back gate. Stopping short they took in the sight before them. Nikki was lying on the grass with Helen on top of her and Gracie on top of Helen, both were tickling Nikki but it didn’t seem to Max and Mich that Nikki was fighting them too much, in fact she looked to be really enjoying the view.

Smiling at each other they came further into the garden before Max shouted.

“Is this a private party or can anyone join in?”

Immediately the trio stopped moving and all turned to look at the intruders. Gracie was the first to react jumping off Helen and running to Max with a squeal of delight. “Auntie Max” she said before launching herself into Max’s waiting arms for a hug.

“Hiya short stuff, you been behaving yourself?”

“Course” Gracie said before letting go.

“Max, Mich” Nikki greeted, finally standing up. “What brings you here?” she said making her way over while brushing the seat of her jeans.

“We just thought we would pop around to see if you were still alive, seen as we haven’t seen you in a long time” Max said. “Plus we have some things to discuss about the case. I think it best if we move this inside” and turning she led the way to the back door and into the kitchen.

Once inside Helen made her way over to the kettle and switched it on. “Coffee? she asked generically and started to pull out mugs and such to make it.

Leaning over Nikki stopped Helen and smiling gently pulled her hand into hers, knowing that Helen was nervous. Facing Max she asked “So what was the outcome?”.

“They have decided not to prosecute Helen but they are Fenner. So your in the clear Helen, I have no idea what the Prison Service will want but there will be no criminal charge.” Max smiled glad that she had relayed good news to her sister and Helen.

“I know” Helen mumbled turning back to the kettle.

“You know?” three voices asked at once.

“Yeah the letter came this morning from area. They want my resignation. Which was to be expected I suppose, it’s just that .... It’s hard to explain. I feel ..... relieved that it’s all over but a little sad as well. At least Fenner won’t be there any more, that b@stard deserves everything that he gets. Besides there’s no reason now for me to be at Larkhall” Helen said cheerfully turning round and smiling at Nikki.

Gently Nikki took Helen into her arms relieved that Helen didn’t blame her for the end of her Prison Service career. Before quietly leaving the two women alone, Max said “We’ll need you to come into the office one day next week to sigh a few things but otehr than that Helen it’s over.” Nikki nodded their understanding before watching her sister leave.


Jim threw the bottle across the room and watched as it smashed and the liquid spread down the wall. Looking at the crumpled letter in his hand he reread the part where that said the CPS were going to prosecute him and screwed it back up again before throwing it the way of the bottle. Those bloody women. Well they weren’t going to get away with it, he was going to make them pay, and when he did they were going to wish they had never crossed Jim Fenner.

“Hi George this is Helen” Nikki introduced while ushering Helen passed the security desk.

“Hi Nikki, nice to meet you Helen” came the muttered response from the woman on the desk as they made it onto the elevator.

Pressing the button for the sixth floor Nikki leant back against the wall of the lift. This was the first time in six weeks that she had been to the office and it was to get the official debrief of the investigation in to the Larkhall case. Helen had come along because she wanted to see where it was that Nikki worked.

Leaning against the left hand side of the lift Helen looked at Nikki lounging on the other wall. God she was beautiful she thought to herself and then wondered if any one would actually notice if the lift was to stop for a while.

“Don’t even think it Stewart” Nikki purred having seen the look in her lovers eyes. “These lifts have an automatic safety switch that lowers them to the ground floor should the emergency button be pressed.”

Pretending to be disappointed Helen sashayed over to Nikki, leant her full length against her and kissed her softly. “Well let’s hurry this up then and get home, Gracie’s staying with Max tonight and I want you all to myself” leaning forward Helen softly brushed her lips against Nikki’s before turning and walking to the doors just as they opened on the floor they wanted. Nikki stood there, shaking slightly wondering how she was going to last before she got Helen home. Maybe Max would be a good sister and loan her, her office for a while.

Following Helen out on to the floor Nikki looked around her at the familiar setting of her office. It seemed quiet here even though it was a Friday afternoon. The place was completely deserted. Not even Mich was at her desk. Mentally shrugging her shoulders Nikki reached for Helen’s hand and led her to Max’s office. Maybe they were all waiting for her in there.

Max’s ears perked up at the sound of the ding to the lift, it had definitely stopped on this level and that meant one thing ... Nikki was here. Outwardly calm but inwardly fearful she hoped that Nikki would see that no- one was about and leave. Focusing on the man in front of her she could see that he had heard the lift also and was waiting for what would happen next. Together they turned to the door and watched as the knob was twisted and the door pushed open, one with a satisfied smile on his face and another with fear in her eyes.

“Come on they must all be in here” Nikki laughed as she pulled Helen into the office after with her. As Nikki was looking at Helen it was the change on her face from laughter to frightened that alerted Nikki to the fact that something wasn’t right. Turning she had a few moments to see that Max and Mich were indeed in the office but so was Jim Fenner. A very angry looking Jim Fenner, a gun toting Jim Fenner.

“Get in here” Jim snarled pulling the two newcomers in. Nikki pulled Helen to her protectively, quickly scanning the room to see if there was anyone else in there with them. Looking at Max and Mich she was relieved to see that they looked to be alright, but she noticed in the corner the slumped figure of Gina leaning against the wall. Laughing Jim sneered “She was supposed to be one of us. You stick together or you fall apart.” and laughing he walked over to Gina and gave her a swift kick in the abdomen.

“Jim!!” Helen shouted, Nikki tried to get her to keep quiet but she wasn‘t quick enough. Helen waited till she had Jim’s attention “What do you hope to achieve by all this”

“Ah if it isn’t bloody super Stewart. Managed to get yourself out of this didn’t you” he said waving a piece of paper in front of her eyes. Helen balked a little, she could smell the alcohol permeating off Jim in sickening waves. “Shagging the investigator must of helped”

Nikki stepped forward. “Jim this isn’t going to help with your defence. Holding five people at gunpoint is only going to make them come down harder on you. Let us go.”

“Your not going anywhere. Ever since you arrived at Larkhall I’ve hated you. With good reason it would seem. Well your not going to get away with it you hear. “ Jim rambled, running his gun hand shakily through his sweaty hair. Nikki noticed the shaking in his hand and quickly looked over the rest of him. The usually dapper looking prison officer was looking most unkempt with a crumpled grey shirt and black trousers. If Nikki wasn’t mistaken they were part of his prison uniform and by the looks, and smell, of it they were the clothes he had been wearing that last day at Larkhall. His hair was unbrushed and longer than the last time he had seen it and he had a full beard gracing his face. Nikki wasn’t sure but she thought he also looked like he had the fading remains of a black eye.

Looking to her sister she saw that Max was ready to spring into action anytime that an opportunity came up. Looking back at Jim she saw that he had got himself a little more under control. “Jim what could you possibly hope to achieve by this.” Nikki asked while inching forward, and away from the others. If she could only get him away from the other three then maybe they had a chance. From the corner of her eye she could see that Max and Mich had both picked up on what she was trying to do and they were both inching away from Fenner in the opposite direction. Fenner himself didn’t notice their movement as he agitatedly kept his eye on Nikki.

“I’m going to kill you of course” he answered so calmly and sure of himself that Nikki stopped stunned at his response.


Nikki was stunned for a moment, he sounded so sure of himself that Nikki knew he meant it. She couldn’t allow that, not only was Max in the room but so was Helen and she wasn’t going to lose two of the most important people in her life this way.

“Be serious Jim. You kill us and they’ll throw away the key, you’ll never get out, but if you let us go and get yourself a really good lawyer you could be out within a couple of years.” she knew she was stretching it a bit now, with the assault on Gina, holding them hostage and the corruption, Jim would be lucky if he saw daylight before ten years, but she had to try.

“Do you really expect me to believe that Wade!” Jim scorned. “do you know what they do to Prison Officers that become cons. I’d be lucky if I got out alive. No ... No the only way now is for me to disappear .... but I'm not going to do that till I've settled some scores ... namely you five” Jim said quite matter of factly swinging around to point the gun at all of them.

Max continued to slowly move, if only she could get to her desk and reach the panic button, there could be help here within a matter of minutes. Things weren’t looking good, Gina was badly beaten and needed help and Jim was in that calm state you reach just before your going to unleash hell, and Max was going to stop that no matter what it took. The gun was at this moment pointed straight for Nikki’s heart and Max was damned if she was going to lose another sister.

She had just reached her desk and was leaning in the final gap for the buzzer when Jim swung round to face her.

“What do you think your doing” Jim screamed just as Max jabbed her finger onto the button.

“It’s over Jim. Any second now and twenty armed guards are going to come crashing through that door.... it’s over give it up” Nikki said from behind Jim.

Jim lowered the gun to waist level and bowed his head. “Shit” he thought to himself, “he had had them until he let his guard down at the end there, he should have tied them all to chairs” He berated himself over his mistakes. He could hear someone running along the corridor now heading in this direction, looking into the faces of the women around him he looked at Helen last. The look of pity in her eyes firmed his resolve, they weren’t going to get away with this if he was going down then he was going to get rid of some of them along the way. Raising the gun, he didn’t have time to aim he just fired blankly before turning and firing in the other direction towards Max and Mich just as the door came crashing in. He was just about to depress the trigger once again when he felt a searing pain in his left shoulder . Turning to see where it had come from he saw the security guard from down stairs stood in the door with her gun aimed at him. Lifting his arm towards the intruder he was just about to fire when she shot first, the bullet cutting into his chest and sending him hurtling towards the floor. Jim didn’t feel his impact with the floor he was already dead.

Nikki couldn’t believe what she was seeing. Jim actually looked beat standing there with his head bent and the gun at his waist. Then he looked up and towards Helen and as if in slow motion he raised the gun and fired in their direction. Moving as quickly as she could she leapt in front of Helen screaming “nooooooooo” just like in the movies and came crashing down into her. She could see the pain rather than feel it, white flashes shooting past her eyes and her last thought before the world went black was “At least Helen was alright”

Feeling the weight of Nikki fall against her Helen was momentarily stunned. When she regained her senses she realised two things. One the cold and lifeless eyes of Jim Fenner were staring right at her and two Nikki was in her arms and not moving.

“Nikki ... Nikki sweetheart please be alright” she begged, gently stroking Nikki’s hair with one hand while the other reached for her wrist looking for a pulse and praying to God that she was going to be alright.

Max watched helpless as her sister went crashing into Helen just as Jim let off a shot, moments later and the gun was facing her. She watched as Jim fired and the sound of another shot rang out almost immediately. Turning towards the door, Max saw George from the desk let off another shot that landed squarely in Jim’s chest. She knew that he was dead before he even hit the ground. Jumping over his body towards Helen and Nikki, she reached them to see a thin trickle of blood ooze out from the back of Nikki’s head in to the hands of Helen who was cradling it lovingly in her lap.

She was just leaning down to check for a pulse when she heard George’s shout. Turning she saw that George had gone over to check on Gina and Michelle. Gina was still slumped against the wall and oddly now so was Mich. It took Max a few moments to work out what she was seeing, a small frown creasing her forehead. When it finally registered that Mich should have been standing Max left Nikki and rushed over. Quickly searching Max found the spot on Mich’s chest where the bullet must have hit, blood was rapidly seeping out, while Mich made small sounds of pain.

“Max” she gasped, “Max it hurts”

“Shhhh Mich your gonna be fine” Max tried to sound positive but she couldn’t Michelle was losing too much blood, too fast. Turning to bark an order for an ambulance she could see that George was already on the phone. “Hang on Mich, helps on the way.”

“Too late” Mich smiled at Max before her head lolled to one side and she was gone.

“No ... No Mich you listen to me you have to stay strong ... please” Max choked, gently shaking Mich but she knew it was futile, Michelle Dockley was dead.

Max gently cradled her friend and colleague in one corner of her office while Helen did the same with her sister in another.


Return to Bad Girls Fiction

Return to Main Page