DISCLAIMER: I own nothing but my imagination. Characters belong to Open Book Productions.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: It's funny because while I love fluff with Otalia, I love the angst with GiAni. Inspired by the song "Letting Go" by Sozzi. From Ani's POV.
SPOILERS: No, but assumes you've seen all episodes to date.
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.
I hang up the phone and just sit there for a moment. Damnit, Gina. The world is whizzing by me. Sweaty guys play basketball near me. A woman is jogging along the pavement, her dog in tow. An eldery couple makes their way down to the beach, hand in hand.
Hand in hand.
I used to imagine us, old and gray, walking along the shore. We'd laugh. We'd love. We'd live. But, I guess, it was all a dream. We were just a dream. A dream so easily washed away by the waves of life that pounded us, broke us down to bits of sand, no longer whole. I let them go. I let you go. I roughly shove my phone, the memories into my purse.
It's easier said than done. But, it must be done. I have to have a life, without you. So, I'll reverse our roles this time. You'll be needy, and emotional, and call me. And, I'll be cold, and distant, and heartless. The wind whips around me, thrashing my hair, my heart around, leaving me stung. I wasn't lying before when I said I wish you wouldn't call me. Don't do it anymore, Gina.
Don't call me. Don't write sappy love poems. Don't show up in the middle of the night, broken and lonely. Don't hold a piece of my fucking heart, and I won't hold a piece of yours.
I close my eyes and take a deep breath. The tears well up inside me, overflowing down my cheek in paths of pain. It's hell with you, but this is hell, without you, too.
You know we both need time and space. I need to breathe. I need to let you go. I need to be free. I need to stop loving you.
I'm sorry that Logan loved you too much. That she controlled you, abused you, broke you. I'm sorry that your dad didn't love you enough. That he controlled you, abused you, broke you. I'm sorry that she died. But, I'm not your mother. I can't pick you up and glue you back together like precious China plates. Because who can do that for me when I fall apart?
We could've been everything. But, now, we have to be nothing.
I stand up, tears clouding my vision, hurt ripping apart my heart. I head towards my car and leave. Leave us, leave you.
Goodbye, Gina. Goodbye.
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