DISCLAIMER: I hereby declare that I neither own nor do I, in any way, profit from the Gossip Girl franchise and all creative rights belong to its original creators. All original characters, plots and/or whatnots are mine alone and their use without permission is heavily frowned upon.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Written for Challenge #219 ~ Memories at femslash100.
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.
Memories of Broken Hearts
Blair can tell the exact moment when Serena's smile begins to crack. She does not have it down to an exact science, but she can surmise well enough from the way Serena's lips tremble very, very slightly, the way her eyes are a little too bright like they are trying their hardest not to cry. Somehow she finds the strength, or maybe the cruelty, to go on about what happened in Chuck's limo, how it happened all the gory details.
By the end of it, Serena is as pale as it is possible for a person to be. She beams at Blair and there is something fundamentally wrong about it: something twisted and painful, an implication of something that squeezes harder at Blair's heart than Chuck's half-hearted proclamation of everlasting love. Serena blinks a couple of times and Blair can distinctly hear the sound of breaking, of shattering of what and whose? and her hands are clammy, cold, shaking on her thighs as she tries and fails to muster the excitement befitting the circumstances.
"Congratulations, B," Serena tells her, her voice high and thin (false) and Blair just wants to strangle her.
"Thank you," Blair finally manages in response after a few stilted moments of silence. Her shoulders slump with a heaviness she cannot explain and the date with Chuck tomorrow night does not seem as wonderful now.
Serena reaches across and wraps Blair in her arms. Her voice is thick now as she whispers, "I'm so happy for you, B. I love you."
Blair's nails dig into Serena's shoulders hard enough to break skin (to mark Serena as hers and hers alone) and she replies hoarsely, "I love you too, S." Why does it feel like they are saying goodbye? She leans in to kiss the rapidly blooming bruises on Serena's shoulder, her lips lingering longer than it is probably proper. Blair pretends not to hear Serena's sharp intake of breath. "I love you too," she says softly, pulling away.
Serena looks a little dazed, like she did that one time they were standing under a mistletoe and Chuck and Nate had dared them to kiss. "Blair, I -"
Blair shakes her head. "Don't," she warns her. "Just don't. Just hold me and don't speak. Please."
Serena sniffs and does as she is told. "I love you, B. So, so much."
"What did I tell you?" I love you.
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