DISCLAIMER: Dick Wolf and NBC own the rights to Law and Order: SVU. I'm just burrowing the characters for entrainment. No money is being made, and no harm is intended.
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.

Out on the Edge
By Berg

Part 1

It happened within 30 seconds.

Tic.

"Freeze!"

Tic.

"Gun! He's got a gun!"

Tic.

"Get down!"

Tic.

"Wait…wait!"

Tic.

"No!"

Tic.

"Don't move you son of a bitch!"

Tic.

"She's hit…Officer Down! Officer Down!"

Tic.

"Can you hear me?"

Tic.

"Clear the room next door!"

Tic.

"Where? Move it…make sure it's empty!"

Tic.

"Get the girl out of here!"

Tic.

"She's okay…"

Tic.

"Where the hell are the EMT's?"

Tic.

"Keep your eyes open."

Tic.

"Sh!t- I think she's going into shock"

Tic.

"Cover her…here take my jacket.

Tic.

I swear to god…if anything happens to her I'll kill him!"

Tic.

"Read him his rights."

Tic.

"Room's clear."

Tic.

Tic.

'Heading for someplace that ain't in a dream. I'm heading where no mortal mans ever been. You may never see my face again. The eyes of a fool, the heart of a lion. I'm climbing a mountain that keeps getting higher. I'm playing a game that no one is supposed to win. On my way to where I want to be. I've got to stay, out on the edge.'

*shallow breath*

'God…This is me. This is really happening isn't it?' She grabbed her side and tried to focus on anything but the pain she was feeling. She could hear the commotion going on around her. She felt their panic…their fear. She could hear her partner yelling.

"Officer Down! Officer Down!"

She closed her eyes and felt the wave of nausea hit her. She was thankful she had skipped breakfast that morning. She was being bombarded with memories, thoughts, feelings. She was on sensory overload.

"Elliot…" she breathed out softly when she opened her eyes again. Elliot stood over her holding her hand.

"It's going to be okay Liv…just hold on."

"I…I…"

"Please honey," he whispered. "Don't talk…just relax. You're going to be fine." Olivia wondered briefly who he was trying to convince. She blinked twice and then focused on the room which was now spinning.

"Alex, Elliot…"

"I know…I'll call her." Elliot wondered why it was important for him to let Alex know…but he'd respect his partners wishes.

"She'll blame herself for this. Don't let her," Olivia shook her head slowly. "Make sure she knows."

"Knows what?" Elliot asked as his tears began to fall. Munch and Finn stood behind him, with a hand placed on his shoulders.

"I love her," Olivia breathed out and closed her eyes.

"Liv…Liv…Olivia…" Elliot said panic clear in his voice.

'I'm rolling the dice and taking the chance. I've got nothing to lose but the rest of my life. I'm chasing a dragon and I'm going to ride him down. The harder I run the fast I go. The faces I've never seen here before. I know this is it. It's too late to turn back now. On my way to where I want to be. I've got to stay, out on the edge.'

Alex signed off on the last case. She closed the folder in front of her and pushed it away. It had been the week from hell. She thought it silly, but she could honestly call it an emotional roller coaster. She had been through so much and finally….it was Friday and she wanted nothing more then to shut down and hide from the world.

Hide from Olivia.

Olivia.

God it scared Alex how well Olivia knew her, read her. She didn't like that feeling. She didn't like the idea of not being in control of the situation. She walked to the shelf in her office and pulled out the trial reading she needed to do for Monday. Placing it in her bag she looked at the clock. She still had half an hour left before her day ended. She glanced at the phone again. She had been resisting the urge to call Olivia all day…at least since their fight that morning.

"How did things get so messed up?" Alex asked no one but herself.

There was a soft knock at the door. "Come in."

Serena entered. She looked pale and somewhat shaken. "Are you okay Serena?" Alex asked approaching her friend.

"Alex…it's one of the Detectives from SVU…"

"What?" Alex asked panic clean on her expression. "What happened?"

"She was shot…"

"She?" Alex repeated. "She…Olivia?"

"They're at the hospital now…I know you two were friends…I thought you should know…"

RING

Alex turned quickly and answered her phone. She felt as though she was going into shock. "Cabot."

"Alex…" Elliot's voice cracked.

"Elliot…is she okay?"


"She's in surgery right now," Elliot sighed. "She asked me to call you."

"I'm coming in now." Alex hung up the phone, grabbed her purse, and ran out her door as fast as her legs would carry her.

'I'm getting closer. I can feel it. I'm out on the edge. On my way to where I want to be. I've got to stay, out on the edge. Can you feel it?'

Part 2

Olivia came into and out of consciousness on her ride to the hospital. She focused on the people she loved, willing herself to stay awake for them. Willing herself to live. Different conversations came into play. Faces mingled with words before her eyes. Faces from the past and the present.

"This is your new partner, Elliot Stabler."

"You were raped Mom…and I'm a product of that? How can you even look

at me?"

"You'll be okay. No one is going to hurt you."

"Do you always put so much cream with your coffee? I saw you more as a

black cup of Joe."

"Counselor…funny meeting you here."

"Liv…did it help? The shrink?"

"It was his daughter."

"What do you want me to say Olivia? You come in here and tell me you think you're feeling something you're not and then start pushing me away. I can't read you, can't read this. You need to talk to me."

"Son of a b!tch hit me."

"Munch get your boney ass out of here."

"Alex why are you pushing me away?"

"Olivia I love you. Isn't that enough?"

"She said I could find you here."

"Mom…I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

Olivia closed her eyes and as she felt herself slip her last thoughts lingered on the woman whom she had grown to love more then she ever imagined. "Alex," she breathed through the mask as it fogged up with her breath.

Alex drove as quickly as she could to the hospital. Her hands were shaking. She wasn't even sure how she had made it to her car without falling her. It was as though her body was on auto pilot. She blinked as unshed tears fell. She cursed herself. She cursed the man who shot Olivia. She cursed the Captain for letting her get into that position. She cursed Olivia for not being more careful.

She thought back to about two months ago. Maybe less. Olivia had dropped by unexpectedly at her door. "Olivia?" Alex said surprised. "What are you doing here still."

"Wrapped up a case. I was just heading out and thought I'd see if you wanted to grab a bite to eat with me."

"I…yeah…sure I was just finishing this," Alex smiled and tossed the folder on her desk.

They had decided to walk since it was such a nice night. There was a small Mexican place down the road from the precinct. Olivia loved it and Alex had never been.

As they sipped from tequila sunrises Alex couldn't help but let the conversation get personal.

"Don't you worry?"

"About getting hurt?" Olivia asked.

"Yeah I mean I'm sure you've accepted that something might happen. Does it do much to reassure you."

Olivia considered Alex's words. "Not really- no." It was an honest answer.

"Why do it?"

"For as long as I can remember I wanted to be a police officer Alex. You definitely don't go into this job not knowing what might happen. Yes there is a risk…but it out weighs the good I hope I've done for people each day."

"So what made you decide to work in SVU?"

Olivia smiled and wished she could change the subject. "We've known each other how long and this is the first time you've asked me that question."

"I'm curious."

"Some of it was personal. Some of it was professional."

"Does it bother you that there are not more woman who work SVU?"

"I've got you don't I?" Olivia smiled. Alex nodded and returned the smile. She wanted to pursue Olivia's 'personal' reasons more, but decided to leave it for another day.

The horn that honked shook Alex as she noticed the light was green. She continued moving again. Alex rushed through the door as she saw Munch, Finn, Cragen, Stabler

and a woman standing with him. Alex saw how intimately they were standing and assumed it must be his wife.

"Where is she?" Alex asked out of breath by the run from the parking garage.

"She's in there now," Cragen said. "They're trying to stabilize her before surgery."

"God," Alex breathed out as she began to cry. "Why? How?" she asked. Her brain couldn't form the questions quick enough. She looked from Munch to Fin to Stabler to Cragen.

"How could you let this happen to her! Why didn't someone stop him?" she asked her voice raising to an inappropriate level.

Part 3

"Alex," Cragen spoke up pulling her aside. "Calm down."

Alex pulled herself away from Cragen. "I will not calm down. I want answers…why?"

"It was a mistake," Elliot spoke up for the first time since Alex's arrival. He stood and let go of Kathy's hand. She nodded his assurance he'd be okay so she let him go. "Come with me Alex…we need to talk."

Alex let Elliot lead her down the hall. He spotted an empty room and brought her inside. "Sit please."

"Elliot," Alex shook her head. "How did this happen?"

"We entered the room…and all hell broke lose," he mumbled. He closed his eyes and saw the events unfold… "it was only a matter of seconds Alex…Jesus…it just a matter of seconds."

Olivia and Elliot rushed the room with Finn and Munch behind them. Olivia saw the suspect run out of one of the room. "Freeze!"

Elliot noticed the shiny silver object in his hand. "Gun! He's got a gun!" he screamed.

"Get down!" Olivia shouted as she pushed Elliot when she saw the gun rise in their direction. "Wait…wait!" she pleaded with the man. The gun echoed through the room.

"No!" Elliot screamed rushing to the side of Olivia who lay still on the floor, bask against the wall. Her trail of blood stained her way down.

"Don't move you son of a bitch!" Finn shouted after he tackled the suspect who dropped his gun when the bullet hit his leg and shoulder.

"She's hit…Officer Down! Officer Down!" Elliot screamed around the room. He quickly retrieved his radio and made the call. He looked at Finn and Munch as they moved around the apartment searching for their victim.

"Can you hear me?" Elliot asked Olivia who seemed to be in and out of it.

"Clear the room next door!" Cragen shouted as he rounded the corner. He directed two uniformed officers to the other end of the hallway.

"Where? Move it…make sure it's empty!" Munch yelled when he heard the call from one of the officers saying they'd found the girl tied to the bed.

"Get the girl out of here!" Finn shouted when he noticed she was clearly in shock.

"She's okay…" Elliot whispered when he saw Olivia's concern even now for the girl.

"Where the hell are the EMT's?" Finn swore his frustration clear.

"Keep your eyes open." Elliot held Olivia's hand.

"Sh!t- I think she's going into shock" Munch said. "Cover her…here take my jacket."

"I swear to god…if anything happens to her I'll kill him!" Elliot mumbled under his breath.

"Read him his rights." Cragen yelled

"Elliot…" Olivia breathed out softly when she opened her eyes again.

"It's going to be okay Liv…just hold on."

"I…I…"

"Please honey," he whispered. "Don't talk…just relax. You're going to be fine." Olivia wondered briefly who he was trying to convince. She blinked twice and then focused on the room which was now spinning.

"Alex, Elliot…"

"I know…I'll call her." Munch looked at Finn curious as Finn returned the look with a shrug.

"She'll blame herself for this. Don't let her," Olivia shook her head slowly. "Make sure she knows."

"Knows what?" Elliot asked as his tears began to fall. Munch and Finn stood behind him, with a hand placed on his shoulders.

"I love her," Olivia breathed out and closed her eyes.

"Liv…Liv…Olivia…" Elliot said panic clear in his voice.

"She…she was worried about me?" Alex said her voice cracking. "God." She fell to the bed with a plop and hung her head.

"Alex…what's going on with you two?" Elliot asked softly. "Are you involved?"

Alex picked her head up and looked at Elliot curiously. She wasn't sure what Olivia had told him…if anything. "That was what we were trying to figure out," she whispered. Elliot just looked at her, concern and care evident in his eyes. He sat down and placed his arms around her shoulder and held her as she cried.

To Be Continued

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