DISCLAIMER: Not mine, not even close to mine. *G*
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.
SPOILERS: "Alienated," "Invincible" (both tiny)

Hallelujah and Pass the Hand Grenades
By Geonn


The dark room was starting to get smaller, or so it seemed from her position behind the bare metal table. So far, she'd spent fifteen minutes staring at the still video camera. She didn't know if it was on or if it had been recording the whole time, but she hadn't moved her eyes from the glass lens since she'd been left alone in this tiny, dark hellhole.

Finally, the door behind her opened. "I hope you weren't left waiting long."

She slowly turned her gaze from the video camera to his eyes. He was wearing glasses and the desk lamp reflected her image back to her. It was no less personal than the video camera. He took a seat and opened her file. "We've gotten some very high recommendations on you," he said.

Jo remained focused.

He raised his eyes to her and said, "Ms. Lupo?" He started to rise. "Ms. Lupo, are you..."

She shoved the table forward with both hands. Her inquisitor was knocked back, the wind blown from his lungs as he fell back into his chair. Jo leapt onto the table and kicked the video camera from the tripod. It slammed into the side of his head and exploded into a million pieces.

As the man fell to the floor, Jo stretched and removed one of the acoustic ceiling tiles from its place. She peered into the dusty, cobweb-draped space and grabbed hold of the sprinkler pipes. It wouldn't hold her weight, but if she...


She froze and slowly bent down. She turned to look at the door and saw Major Cobb standing in the doorway. He shook his head as he examined the damage. "Told them they should've handcuffed you until I showed up." He pulled her seat over and dropped into it. "You all right, Alex?"

The inquisitor was sitting up on the floor. "She kicked the goddamn camera into my head!"

"Be lucky she didn't shoot you."

"We disarmed her before we--"

Jo pulled a small gun from her shoe and handed it to Cobb barrel-first.

Cobb pushed the gun into his belt and said, "So. What are your plans after that little debacle?"

"Plans, sir?" she asked. She jumped off the table and assumed a parade rest.

"You're honorably discharged after I pulled about every string I had. Yes, Jo, I still have strings. Or I did, before I bailed your ass out. So? Where are you going now?"

"I guess I hadn't thought about it much, sir."

He nodded and patted his belly. "Ever thought about law enforcement?"

Jo scoffed.

Eureka wasn't just slow. It was glacial.

Major... no, Sheriff Cobb gave her an exam before he allowed her to touch the weapons. She finished without any trouble whatsoever and handed the sheet back. Probably just a formality, but did they have to make those questions so embarrassingly simple? An eight-year-old could get access to the weapons if that was the criteria.

She spent a few days playing with the vast array of weaponry they had available, some of which she thought only existed in her fantasies, before boredom set in once more.

Cobb watched her pace the length of their office twice before he leaned back in his chair. "You know, you should go see Beverly Barlowe."

"I have a house," Jo sighed. "I don't need a bed and breakfast." She massaged the back of her neck and leaned against the wall.

"Oh, Beverly has other talents. Trust me. Take the afternoon, go talk with her."

Jo sighed and shrugged. "All right. It'll give me a chance to scope out the rest of the town, I guess." She grabbed her coat and pulled it on as she headed out the door.

Beverly Barlowe pushed the curtains aside and watched the new deputy push through her front gate. She smiled and went to the front door, opening it just as the young woman was reaching for the bell. "Hello. I'm Beverly Barlowe."

"Hello," the deputy said. "I'm Jo Lupo."

Beverly held the door and stepped aside. "It's nice to finally meet you," she said.

Jo stepped into the beautiful house and unzipped her jacket. She wasn't sure why, but she felt comfortable here.

"What can I do for you, Jo?"

"You tell me," she said. "Sheriff Cobb sent me over."

"You were the Army Ranger, right?" Beverly asked. She closed the door and moved towards the sitting room.

"That's right."

Beverly sat and indicated for Jo to take the other armchair. Jo took a seat and watched as Beverly crossed her legs, the slit in her skirt parting to reveal pretty much all of her upper thigh. She cleared her throat and indicated the teapot. "May I?"

"Yes, please," Beverly said. She sat forward and took the pot, pouring a cup for each of them. When she handed Jo her cup, their fingers brushed.

Jo smiled nervously and said, "Thank you."

"So, Army Ranger. I guess our little town seems kind of dull by comparison."

Jo smiled.

"All you have to do is remember that the slow times are almost always followed up with instances of sheer terror. That's where you can shine."

"That's all well and good, but what do I do in the meantime?"

Beverly smiled.

"Slow," Beverly whispered. Her hand was gentle around Jo's, her fingertips resting between Jo's knuckles to guide her hand. "There. Gentle... you see?"

"Mm-hmm," Jo said. She chuckled and said, "God. I'll tell you, I never thought I'd enjoy something like this. Never."

"Something like this?" Beverly asked.

"Something so... serene. Quiet."

"Well, we all need to get away sometimes," Beverly said. "Let's see what it looks like."

She released Jo's hand and they both stepped back. The painting was a simple view of Eureka through Beverly's front window. Jo had taken off her uniform blouse and bulletproof vest to keep them from being splattered. Her fingertips and the ball of her wrist, however, were now green-tinged. "Is there a place where I can wash up?"

"Sure," Beverly said. She indicated a small laundry room off the foyer and Jo excused herself. She pushed the door halfway shut behind her and peeled the t-shirt over her head. She picked up her uniform blouse and stopped before she could pull it on. That scent... it almost smelled like...

She opened the door and saw Beverly standing just outside the door. "Hello, Jo," Beverly said. She had one arm propped against the door, her fingernails curled and lightly scratching her palm. Her blue eyes dipped down to Jo's bra and she held up her uniform blouse to cover herself.

"I thought... I could've sworn I smelled..."

Beverly smiled. "What? I'm wearing a new scent that Global Dynamics is beta-testing. It responds to pheromones and triggers a different reaction to whoever smells it. So, please." She gently parted the halves of her blouse and exposed her collarbone. "What did you smell?"

Jo leaned in and closed her eyes. "Black powder solvent," she exhaled.

Beverly smiled. "That's certainly... unique."

Jo sighed and straightened. Her eyelids fluttered open and she realized how close she was standing to Beverly. "I'm sorry..."

"Don't be," Beverly whispered. "After all. One can't paint... all the time." She moved her fingers down and popped loose another button.

"We just met," Jo said, her eyes locked on the bit of exposed cleavage.

"What better way to get acquainted?"

Jo bit her lip and brought her hand up to Beverly's collar. She popped loose another button, this time exposing the lacy cup of her bra. Beverly smiled, her lips curling like a snake in the grass. "I knew you'd be one to take the initiative."

Jo's eyes glinted.

The bedroom had obviously seen its fair share of guests. Jo didn't care. Beverly let her be on top at first, allowed herself to be pushed onto the bed as Jo climbed onto her. They kissed desperately, hands roaming. Jo sat up and took care not to rip or tear Beverly's expensive silk top. She pushed the halves aside and fanned her fingers on the redhead's stomach. "Yeah," she breathed. "I'm definitely going to find things to enjoy in this town..."

Beverly stretched both arms over her head and said, "I like to let my lovers led the way the first time."

"Well, then," Jo said. She tightened her thighs around Beverly and unhooked the cuffs from her belt. "Let's see how well you follow directions."

Beverly smiled and obediently crossed her wrists. Jo stretched out and closed one ring around Beverly's wrist. She looped the chain around the slat of the headboard and then restrained the other hand. Beverly lifted her head and pressed her lips to Jo's breast, suckling through the sport's bra she was wearing.

Jo pulled off her bra and tossed it across the room. Beverly made the handcuffs sing against the headboard as she shifted on the mattress.

Jo slid down Beverly's body, tracing her curves with her fingertips, pushed her hands under the hem of Beverly's skirt. "Are you wearing garters?" Jo asked.

"Yes," Beverly said.

Jo closed her eyes and moved her hands under the navy blue material, exploring by touch like a blind woman. "And you've shaved."

"Yes," Beverly said with a quiet gasp. "Every day."

"What a pain," Jo smirked.

"It's worth it," Beverly assured her. "You never know when you'll get a chance to... enjoy it."

Jo grinned and pulled her hands free. Beverly lifted her hips and Jo tugged her skirt down and off. She tossed it in the direction of her bra and sighed. "Mm. You're right. It's worth it."

Later, uncuffed, naked and sweating, Beverly pushed Jo onto her back and settled between her legs. She sat up and pushed her hair from her face. The sun was beginning to set and it cast a golden aura around Beverly. Jo brought both hands up to caress Beverly's breasts. "Good," Beverly breathed. "I think I'm starting to get an idea of what you like."

"You sure? I could give you another demonstration..."

Beverly pinched both of Jo's nipples and gasped at the other woman's cry of pleasure. "Yes?" Beverly asked.

Jo's eyes darkened and she smiled. "Harder."

Beverly pinched again and Jo's back arched off the bed.

The next morning, Sheriff Cobb barely looked up from his paper as Jo walked into the office. "Morning," she said.

"Uh, mm? Oh, morning," he replied.

She sat behind her desk and picked up the phone as soon as it rang. "Sheriff's Office. This is Deputy Lupo." She frowned and tucked the receiver against her chin. "A Carl Carlson...?"

"Oh, damn it," Cobb said. He looked at his watch and tsked at himself. "Tell him I'm on my way."

As he hustled out the door, Jo said, "He's on his way, Mr. Carlson. Nice to meet you, too."

She hung up and leaned back in her chair, staring at the opposite wall for a moment. She couldn't remember much about last night, but what she did remember...

She bit her bottom lip and pulled her chair forward. She'd have to remember to pick up some paints on her way home...

The End

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