DISCLAIMER: I don't own any of these characters, I'm just borrowing them.
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.
She's My Man
Alexis approached the tiled wall of the station, the click of her high heels drowned out by the sound of voices yelling, equipment being moved around, and dozens of people shuffling about. Resting herself gingerly against the wall, Alexis looked out onto the subway platform which was currently devoid of people that weren't employed by Mode before angling her head to look up the set of stairs opposite her. At the top she could just make out the wheel of a bicycle.
Though she couldn't see her, Alexis knew that sitting on top of that bicycle was Jordan Dunn. She knew because she was the reason Jordan and everyone else was down there. That night in Daniel's office when she had gone to warn Jordan about Daniel only to end up with Jordan in her arms was supposed to be the last day of Jordan's shoot with Mode. However, Alexis hadn't been able to get the kiss or Jordan out of her mind after the brunette had left the magazine and needed to see her again.
Considering that their kiss was supposed to be goodbye, Alexis wasn't certain how Jordan would respond to her calling her up and asking her out for drinks, so instead she called up her agent and told them that Mode was so in love with the bungee jumping pictures that they wanted to dedicate two more pages of the magazine to Jordan and her sporty yet glamorous girl power. It was cowardly, but Alexis also hoped that it would be effective.
A loud shout followed by complete silence drew Alexis's attention back to her surrounding and she looked up at the stairs once more. A few seconds later a bicycle and a stylishly dressed rider began slide into view riding the handle rails of the stairs before hopping off to ride down the second set of steps, the camera clicking away in the distance catching every moment. When the bike landed on the smooth floor of the platform it then kept on going picking up speed until it jumped on top of a bench, rode the length of it and then jumped off the end before Jordan turned the bike in a sharp half-circle bringing it to a stop and stepped off smiling and flipping her hair as her face was bathed in the pale white light of flash bulbs.
A few seconds later the clicks of the camera ceased and the platform erupted into applause and excited chatter.
Alexis released the breath she had been holding, a smile working its way across her face as well. She had loved and hated to watch Jordan's stunts when they were dating. It was exciting and sexy to watch Jordan be so badass, but there was also the fear and worry while the stunt was going on that something horrible was going to happen to her that never let Alexis really enjoy it until after it was all over.
Alexis took a deep breath and pushed away from the walls, drawing up to her full height. It was time to go play Editor and Chief.
Alexis kept Jordan in her line of sight as she talked with the photographer and thanked him for his time, her mind only half on what she was saying. There was the crew to think about as they very efficiently cleaned up the platform. They only had a limited amount of time at the stop and needed to clear out as soon as possible. And when she got back to the office she would need to check with Nick to make sure that the wine and cheese baskets with complementary checks had been delivered to all of the people who had made the shoot possible on such short notice. But mostly her mind was focused on Jordan and how their meeting would go when she could no longer pretend to be working.
A few moments later Alexis excused herself and made her way over to Jordan, a smile spread across Alexis's face that she didn't have to fake. "You were amazing as always."
"It helps when the consequences of being anything less will lead to an extended hospital stay," Jordan responded smiling as well, though there was a speculative look in her eyes that Alexis didn't miss. "You know how I hate Jell-o."
Alexis laughed lightly at that. "You like throwing it though," she responded running a hand through her hair before beginning to walk towards the stairs, Jordan following her. "At completely innocent people," Alexis went on assuming an innocent tone, "who did absolutely nothing to you and were just trying to be helpful."
"Helpful!" Jordan exclaimed looking over at Alexis to say more only to stop herself when she saw the amused look on the blonde's face. She reached out and knocked Alexis in the arm before shaking her head. "You almost had me going."
"You're so cute when you pout," Alexis responded grinning. Bugging Jordan had been one of her favorite things to do when they were dating. Jordan would always get so adorable and pouty, and would usually punch her arm lightly and then they would both laugh and fall against the nearest flat surface kissing and struggling for control.
Jordan glanced over at Alexis after she spoke but didn't respond right away. She had a playful retort in mind, but bit down on saying it out loud. She didn't like how easy it was to fall back into playful banter with Alex. She didn't like how her heart was racing almost as quickly as it was when she rode down those stairs. She'd always been a sucker for Alex, no matter how upset she had been with him, when he turned those eyes on her and flashed her that grin she just used to melt. And she had thought that it would be different now that Alex was Alexis, but even though the packaging had changed Alex was still in there. It was still Alex's eyes, and still Alex's smile and she found herself melting again.
"I have a draft of the layout we're thinking of going with right now," Alexis began after the silence began to become a little awkward. "I thought you might like to take a look at it, maybe make some suggestions," she went on. "Feel like going for an organic smoothie?" she continued finally turning to look a Jordan, an impish grin on her face as she patted her stomach and went 'Mmm'.
Jordan laughed at that, she couldn't help it. Alex hated all of the health food she used to try to make him eat, and though he now had a figure that would need a Strawberry energy shake with ginko biloba and antioxidants to maintain its current level of perfection, it seemed as if he she still preferred burgers and root beer floats.
"You don't have to do that to yourself," Jordan said a moment later, turning those speculative eyes on Alexis once more. "You could just send the pages to my agent."
"I could," Alexis agreed as they stepped out into a surprisingly bright afternoon. "But," Alexis continued her voice quieting a bit despite the fact that they were now out on a noisy street, "I wanted to see you, not a FedEx man."
"Really?" Jordan said unconsciously heading in the direction of The Pump even though she hadn't yet agreed to go for smoothies. "I thought they were more your taste these days," she went on careful to keep her tone conversational and breezy.
Alexis sighed softly. She knew this conversation was coming, but it didn't mean that she wanted to have it. She knew that she had no choice however, and that honestly Jordan did deserve a response.
"Not exclusively," Alexis replied looking over at Jordan. "I wasn't pretending," she continued placing her hand on Jordan's shoulder drawing the brunette to a stop. "Before this," Alexis said gesturing to herself, "Not about how I felt about you," she continued. "You know that's true," Alexis whispered fiercely remembering Jordan coming into her office and sitting on her lap and how she was hard with want for Jordan in minutes. She remembered burying her face between Jordan's thighs, making love to her with her mouth for hours, until Jordan had lost her voice from screaming her name every time she had come. She hadn't faked a thing with Jordan, not when it came to that.
"I know what I want to believe," Jordan breathed out a little unsteadily, remembering herself how Alex seemed to worship her body, how he had taken the time to excite her and explore her with his mouth and hands. Alex had been the best lover she had ever had. She didn't want to believe that she was just one of the things that he had had to do to maintain his golden boy cover. "But I didn't know about this," she continued softly resting her hand on the womanly curve of Alexis's hip. "Or about your non-exclusive tastes. And it's hard not to wonder Alex," Jordan said removing her hand and staring down at the street. "You were so good at hiding everything, that it's hard to know what was you and what was an act."
"Jordy," Alexis breathed out reaching for Jordan's hand. "We weren't an act. I I made mistakes back then, I made a lot of mistakes," she continued. "I loved you, and I should have told you what I was going through, but I was scared. My father," Alexis went on her voice darkening as she spoke of her father. "He convinced me I would lose everyone if they knew, not only that but that they would hate me," Alexis said blinking fighting a losing battle to contain her tears. "I didn't want you to hate me, Jordy. I " Alexis broke off looking down at the ground unable to continue.
Jordan stepped forward wrapping her arms around Alexis, drawing her into a hug the blonde gratefully accepted. They stood wrapped around each other like that for a long time, drawing a few glances but not much interest from other pedestrians.
"Come home with me," Jordan whispered finally as Alexis began to pull herself together.
"What?" Alexis asked sniffling as she pulled back away from Jordan's body.
"We need to talk," Jordan said reaching out and rubbing her thumb over Alexis's check, wiping at a tear track. "And I don't want to do it here," she continued looking around the busy street. People really weren't paying that much attention to them, but it left her feeling entirely too open. "I'm only a few blocks from here."
Alexis nodded and allowed Jordan to lead the way.
Alexis held the small tumbler in her hand, staring down into the amber liquid. She really wanted to just toss it back and ask for another, but she was sure that that wasn't lady-like.
Tearing her eyes away from her drink, Alexis looked over at Jordan who smirked at her and then brought the tumbler up to her lips and downed the drink in one shot.
"Oh, thank god," Alexis murmured before doing the same and holding the glass out to Jordan for another.
"Don't worry, there's no sipping from shot glasses," Jordan said smiling a little as she refilled Alexis's glass. "Well, you can. But people laugh."
"Would've helped to know that last Thursday on Jell-o shot night at GT's," Alexis replied smiling a little, the warm burn running through her system calming her a little bit. Scotch was a friend that had never let her down.
"Are you still going out drinking with the boys?" Jordan asked smiling a little at the thought of Alexis carousing around like Alex used to.
"No," Alexis said shaking her head, a shadow falling over her face. "The boys sort of hate my guts," she continued smiling though they both knew there wasn't anything funny about the comment. "Faking my death turned out to not be such a popular plan."
"Are you really surprised by that?" Jordan asked very curious as to what Alexis's response would be. Alex had always been a little self-involved, and she realized now why some of that was, but she couldn't understand how he thought faking his death could possibly be a solution to any problem.
"I don't know. Yes and no, I guess," Alexis responded looking away from Jordan allowing her eyes to drift around the room. "I expected them not to return my calls, I expected to be blacklisted, but I thought it would be because they couldn't deal with who I really was. But for the most part, it wasn't that at all," Alexis went on allowing her eyes to drift back to Jordan. "It wasn't 'you're sick', or 'how could you chop your dick off?' or 'were you checking me out in the showers?', it was 'I spoke at your funeral you asshole', 'I was out drinking with you the night before, I blamed myself for letting you go out on the slopes. I couldn't sleep for months' and 'Dude, I cried man, when I heard you were dead, I cried'." Alexis stopped and sighed deeply. "I honestly, I didn't think about it. I am an asshole. I mean, thinking back on it now, I don't understand how I couldn't have but I didn't. I was just I was just thinking about me."
Alexis looked down at the tumbler in her hands. She wanted to drink it but her hand was shaking slightly and she was afraid she would spill it.
Jordan stood up and moved from the chair she had been seated on over to the couch where she sat down beside Alexis and placed her hand on her thigh.
"Why don't you hate me?" Alexis said a few moments later.
Jordan was quiet for a moment. It was a good question and one she had asked herself after they first met again a week before. "I don't know," Jordan said finally avoiding Alexis's eyes. "I feel like I should be, like I should be throwing things, or cursing at you. But, the moment I saw you, I I knew you, and I was just I was just glad you were alive."
Alexis stared at Jordan's profile. Her cheeks were wet with tears, and her face was pale and pinched as she fought to keep what control she had left. But she looked beautiful to Alexis, and the blonde wanted to wrap Jordan in her arms and run kisses down upon her face, to ease the pain she had put the brunette through.
Jordan gasped slightly as she felt Alexis's lips upon her own, her lips parting allowing Alexis to deepen the kiss, her body wilting at the contact and falling into Alexis's body easily.
Alexis blinked slowly as Jordan pushed her away from her.
"Don't," Jordan said shaking her head as she stared at Alexis. "Don't do this to me."
"I don't understand," Alexis said sounding genuinely confused as she stared at Jordan, her hand twitching at her side as if she wanted to reach out for the brunette but was afraid the touch would be rejected if she tried.
"I can't go through this again with you," Jordan said. "You don't know what you want, who you want, or who you are," she continued pinching the bridge of her nose. "And I can't be with you while you figure it out."
"I know who I am," Alexis said finally giving into instinct and reaching out for Jordan. "It took a long time, but I know who I am," she continued holding Jordan's hand. "And I know that I want you," she went on her voice strong and clear. "I fucked up before; I know that. In fact, so spectacularly that I don't deserve a second chance but I'm going to ask for one anyway. I was hiding so much before that I couldn't believe you loved me, but I'm not hiding anymore, I'm here now. And so much has changed, but the more I'm with you the more I realize the way I feel about you hasn't," Alex went on blinking against the sting of tears in her eyes but not turning away from Jordan, not hiding what she was feeling. "I'm not perfect, Jordy, I can't promise you forever, but I want to try," Alexis continued shifting closer to Jordan on the couch. "I want to be with you, and I think I'm finally ready to let you be with me."
Jordan held Alexis's gaze for a moment longer and then looked away sighing. Trying again with Alexis scared her. She had just managed to pull herself back together after losing him the first time and the idea of opening herself up for that kind of pain again scared her. But at the same time, she had never felt about anyone the way she had about Alex, and despite all reason, the strength of her emotions when it came to Alexis were just as strong as they had been before. Breasts or not she was still her man. That much hadn't changed. She would take the chance. She had to.
"I've never been with a woman before," Jordan said looking over at Alexis. "I've looked, I've had a few interesting dreams, but I've never actually you know," she said waving her hand a little. "I don't know if I mean, when you kiss me, when I look at you I feel tingly. But I don't know if "
Alexis nodded as Jordan trailed off, relief flooding through her body a smile slowly working its way across her face. "That's it's okay," Alexis said finally, her voice reassuring. "I know that this has to be weird for you."
Jordan laughed softly. "A little weird. Yeah," she responded glancing over at Alexis a small smile on her face. "You're really beautiful," Jordan continued a moment later blushing slightly as she reached out to run her fingers over the smooth skin of Alexis's cheek. "I mean, you were always good looking, but you're luminous now."
"Thank you," Alexis said softly in response, turning her face into the warm of Jordan's hand. "It's like I can relax for the first time in my life," Alexis continued lifting her eyes to meet Jordan's again. "I finally feel comfortable. Maybe it shows."
"It does," Jordan said quietly stroking Alexis's cheek one more time before she leaned forward and softly brushed her lips against Alexis's.
Alexis leaned into the touch, resting her hand on Jordan's thigh to steady herself but made no move to rush the kiss. It was the first time Jordan had initiated contact and she didn't want to spook her, or push her to a point she wasn't ready for yet.
"You taste like strawberries," Jordan breathed out a few moments later pulling back from Alexis's lips just enough to speak, but not so far away that she couldn't still feel the warmth of the blonde's face on her own.
"Is that a good thing?" Alexis asked quietly. She had always thought so. Jordan had always used a fruit tasting lip-gloss and she had never been able to get enough of Jordan's lips.
"Yeah," Jordan said licking her lips before focusing on Alexis's again. "You used to taste like beer."
Alexis laughed softly at that and then shrugged her shoulders. She couldn't argue with that.
"Strawberries are better," Jordan added a second later and with that she leaned in again bringing their lips together once more.
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