DISCLAIMER: The Facts of Life and its characters are the property of Columbia Pictures Television and Sony Pictures Television. No infringement intended.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: The title comes from the song by Tal Bachman which has nothing to do with getting high, but is about admiring someone believed to be out of reach. For some unknown reason, it kept popping into my head while writing this story, so I decided to go with it. It was released a good ten years after the end of the show. Feedback greatly appreciated!
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.

She's so High
By Birograce


Jo wandered through the party nursing the last of her third beer. These college parties didn't appeal to her that much, but she would make an appearance in an effort to be moderately social. And secretly, she came to keep an eye on Blair. College parties weren't the same as her hoity-toity society parties and Blair could be naive to things beyond her bubble. As much as it pained her to admit it, even to herself, Jo cared about Blair and felt protective of the blonde. No matter how easily they butted heads or how different they were individually, they had a simpatico friendship; a close unspoken bond.

Jo was about ready to leave, so she scanned the crowded hotel suite for Blair and spotted her sitting merrily atop the back of a love seat with a smattering of guys surrounding her. For a moment Jo admired the blonde from afar as she twirled a lock of hair and flashed her charming smile at her adoring fans. Jo approached. Drunken cowardice prevailed as the men saw Blair's infamous roommate and scattered.

"Jo!" Blair said delighted. She swayed a bit on her perch and Jo suspected she had sampled the refreshments.

"Hey, Blair. I think it's time to head home. How much have you had to dri…" Jo's question was cut off as Blair leaned in and stuffed a small cookie into her mouth. As she chewed it hesitantly, she immediately noticed the distinct taste and looked around for somewhere to spit it out. At a loss, she reluctantly swallowed it and washed it down with her last sip of beer. "Where'd ya get that?"

"Some lovely fellow gave me two!" Blair exclaimed. She was always really happy when she drank. Now, Jo contemplated wearily, she was likely to find out what the blonde was like stoned.

"Didja eat the other one?" Jo asked concerned.

"Yeeess," the blonde answered as though that were obvious.

"Blair, they're special cookies," Jo explained.


"No, I mean they have a special ingredient. Ya know? Ya only had one, right? Just now?"

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever secret ingredient they have, it isn't very good. They taste awful." She made a disgusted face. "The guy said 'double trouble', but there isn't even that much chocolate in them."

Jo rolled her eyes. 'Double trouble' as in probably double dosed. They were in trouble and needed to get away from this party. Regretting her decision to consume the forced edible, the brunette started considering their options. She didn't want to be stuck at this party when this stuff kicked in. Who knew how strong or how long it would last? Getting high wasn't the end of the world, in and of itself, but she didn't want either of them in that state around here. A bunch of drunken frat boys who likely didn't understand the word 'no' could not be trusted when defences were down, especially if the guy who gave Blair the cookies was still lurking nearby.

"For cryin' out loud, Blair! Don't you know not to accept food and drinks from strange guys?"

"He was friendly! And he was giving them to everyone! What's the big deal?"

"They got pot in 'em, Blair!" Jo grabbed Blair by the hand. "Come on. We gotta get outta here."

As Jo pulled her out the door, Blair continued to brush off Jo's concern. She swatted Jo flirtatiously. "Don't be silly! I'm not high!"

"Not yet." Jo paused in the hallway, suddenly, and Blair bumped into her. "We can't go home now," she realized.

"Not yet?" Blair asked confused.

Either it was the booze, or the cookies were kicking in already, but Blair was extra touchy. She was wrapping herself around Jo's arm and playing with her fingers. It was distracting.

"It's not like smokin' it. It'll take time for it to kick in. Maybe thirty minutes? Give or take?"

Realization was finally starting to hit Blair and she showed a conflicted mix of worry and amusement. "Special cookies, huh?…I, I've never been high before… You'll stay with me, right, Jo?"

"Sure, but help me out here, Blair. Where should we go? We can't drive. We could get a cab, but by the time we get home we'll likely be thoroughly and visibly stoned and Mrs. G will be furious."

Blair perked up and wrapped her arms around Jo's neck. "Jo! I just had one of my brilliant ideas!"

"Great. Like taking pot cookies from a dude at a college party?"

Blair pouted at Jo's barb, but quickly recovered with renewed glee. "We can stay here. I'll get us a room!"

"Nah, nah, nah," Jo said, immediately refusing the idea for multiple reasons. Blair's current inclination toward physical affection being one of them. Jo tried to shrug off the blonde, but she clung tightly. "What's with you? How much did you have to drink?"

"Just two glasses of white wine. I'm having a good time. Is that so horrible?"

Blair batted her eyelashes and played innocent as she fiddled with Jo's collar. Either she was hallucinating or Blair was seriously flirting with her. It was beginning to feel very warm out here in the hallway.

"Fine. We'll get a room. But two beds! I'm not sharin' with you! You're all touchy-feely tonight."

Blair smiled triumphantly and sauntered down the hallway. Jo followed apprehensively.

Jo found a payphone and checked in at home, giving them as little information as possible, then waited as Blair handled things at the front desk. She watched as the blonde turned her flirting on the hotel clerk, relaxing a bit with the recognition that Blair flirted with everyone. Apparently, Jo was no exception, at least when Blair was tipsy. She observed as her roommate giggled and tossed her hair. Jo chuckled at the spectacle and started to feel the onset of relaxed euphoria.

When she was done, Blair sashayed back to Jo's side dangling the key with a satisfied glint in her eye. Smiling, Jo grabbed the key and Blair burst into giggles. It was definitely starting to kick in.

As a rule, Jo didn't giggle. She laughed, she chuckled, she even snickered, but she did not giggle — unless she was stoned apparently. And Blair Warner's giggles were infectious. So, as the two young women slowly meandered to their assigned hotel room they burst into sporadic bouts of giggles, Jo shushing them frequently.

By the time they made it to their door, Jo was hazy enough to struggle with the lock. Blair pushed in close, convinced she could assist, but only managed to distract Jo further. The brunette swatted her hands away and continued to fiddle with the lock. Blair leaned against Jo's back and snaked her hands around Jo's waist instead.

"Staap! That tickles! I'm tryin' ta focus here," Jo laughed.

Finally, the key turned and the door swung open. Upon discovering the solitary double bed, Jo swung around and directed a melodramatic scowl Blair's way. The blonde nibbled on her index finger in mock innocence.


Jo attempted to hold the scowl, but a snort escaped instead. They both burst into giggles again. Blair playfully tackled Jo onto the bed, wrestling with her until she sat up straddling her hips.

"This is going to be so much fun! We'll tell secrets and cuddle and…"

Jo's giggles faded and her gaze turned sultry, looking up at Blair all disheveled and dress askew. Her throat suddenly seemed very dry and she felt her pulse quicken. Blair seemed to notice their intimate position too, right before she dropped down and touched her lips to Jo's. Both their bodies reacted entirely on impulse. As Blair pressed into her, Jo hungrily kissed her back, losing herself in the kiss and the ones that followed. Her hands found their way to Blair's hips where her dress had ridden up. The blonde nipped and licked at her lips, teasing her tongue and releasing little pleasing moans. Jo groaned and arched into her as Blair kissed her senseless. Through the fog, a voice at the back of her head reminded Jo of their altered mental state and that this was Blair, her best friend, grinding into her.

"Mmmm…. shit!" Jo pulled away reluctantly. "Wait, Blair."

"Whyyyy…" Blair whined and moved her affections down Jo's neck.

"'Cause we're not… thinking straight."

"Hehe… I know… I'm not thinking straight at all." Blair giggled at the pun. She accentuated her point by cupping Jo's breasts through her shirt. Jo groaned again, her eyes rolling back in her head, but still shifted Blair's caress away from her chest.

"Blair… This isn't a game." Jo brought her palms over her eyes in hopes it would stop her head from spinning. "You're my best friend and you'll regret this in the morning."

The blonde sobered and looked at Jo lovingly. She cupped her cheek tenderly. "No. I won't, Jo," she said in total seriousness. "I've wanted this for a long time." She placed a soft kiss on the brunette's mouth and gently pried her hands from her eyes. "I've just been too chicken to do anything about it."

Jo looked at her skeptically. "Are you screwin' with me?"

Blair shook her head then laid it down on Jo's chest with her ear against her rapid heartbeat. She relaxed against Jo's still tingling body as they both took a moment to breathe.

This was all so surreal. Jo had never before permitted herself any more than a few passing glances of wistful admiration towards Blair. Allowing herself to think too deeply of her friend in that way was dangerous. But now, here Blair was, confessing feelings of her own and Jo finally indulged in the possibility of being something other than friends with Blair.

"I love you, Jo. I was having such a dull night until you rescued me."

"Now, you're definitely just saying that 'cause you're high," she joked. "But, I love you, too, Blair."

"Can we go back to making out? Because that was fabulous."

"… Jus' promise me somethin'?"


"If ya wake up tomorrow, and realize this was a mistake and ya don't actually feel this way… promise me that we'll still be friends. I can't lose you."

Blair lifted her head to look Jo in the eyes. "That won't happen, but I promise."

Jo grabbed Blair and kissed her. The blonde giggled into the kiss as Jo flipped them and pinned her to the bed.

"Fabulous, huh?" Jo grinned mischievously. She trailed wet kisses down Blair's neck, pulling aside the shoulder of her dress. Blair moaned as her hands roamed under Jo's shirt, dragging nails along her back seductively and feeling Jo shiver.

Pausing Jo's wonderful ministrations, Blair shifted around onto her stomach presenting her back. The brunette was confused for a moment until Blair motioned to the zipper that ran down the back of her navy blue dress. Message received, Jo tucked Blair's hair out of the way and placed a nervous kiss on the spot just above the zipper pull. She gently tugged the zipper down Blair's back peppering kisses across the newly revealed skin as she went. Jo lifted Blair up and against her, sweeping the dress down to the bed. Her hands traveled across Blair's smooth stomach as Blair reached back one hand to squeeze Jo's strong thigh and the other to tangle in dark hair. The brunette found the pulse point just above Blair's collar bone, licking and sucking the delicate spot as the blonde moaned.

Eventually, Blair turned around in Jo's arms to face her again. She lifted Jo's t-shirt up over her head before meeting lips. As they kissed, she snapped Jo's bra band teasingly, causing her to jerk.

"Hey!" Jo glared, but Blair just smiled and pushed her back against the pillows, soothing the reddened spot with her mouth. She made quick work of Jo's jeans sliding them down her legs then crawled back up into her arms, depositing a kisses above her navel and over her cleavage, on the way. "I hate to say this, but I think we should slow down," Jo whispered reluctantly.

"Hmm?" Blair still trailed kisses and nibbles across Jo's chest.

"I think second base is about as far as we should go tonight."

Not discouraged, Blair moved to straddle the tough brunette again and feigned ignorance. "I'm not entirely clear on the bases. What's second base again?"

Jo slid her hands up, cupping Blair's breasts. "That's second base."

"See, I thought…" Blair shoved Jo's bra up and out of the way, then cupped her bare breasts. "… that this was second." She leaned in and rans her tongue over a nipple. Jo sucked in a breath.

Realizing she needed to be perfectly clear and blunt, Jo insisted, "Blair… we're not gonna have sex tonight. We can't. We both gotta be totally sober if that happens." She reluctantly pulled her bra back into place.

"Okay, I'll agree to that, but I'm still not done here." Her lips met Jo's as she removed her own bra. "You said second base. I want you to touch me, without anything between us."

It didn't take any more convincing. Their mouths duelled as Jo's hands smoothed along Blair's bare back. She teased the sides of her breasts with her fingertips before sliding her thumbs, then palms, across the pink puckered buds. Blair sighed into their kiss, in satisfaction. She withdrew for a moment, her hands resting over Jo's bra. "Can I, please?"

"Yeah." Jo agreed, unable to resist the temptation of skin on skin. "But that's the last thing comin' off tonight." She was serious, despite how breathless the words came out. It wasn't that she didn't want to. This all felt so amazing. Jo desperately wanted to tear every last scrap of fabric away and take Blair right now. God, did she want to, but this wasn't the right time. That decision had to be made with a totally clear head.

Blair pulled the bra up over Jo's head swiftly. Tossing the undergarment aside, she lay her body across Jo's, fully skin to skin. Manicured nails trailed lightly along Jo's biceps to her forearms and along her palms until fingers entwined. They each stared into hooded eyes mesmerized at the sensations heightened by their drug induced state.

Remaining within the boundaries set, they touched and kissed, exploring each other for a while longer until they drifted off to sleep tangled together.

Before Jo opened her eyes, she became aware of several things: an incessant hum or buzzing in the distance, a churning in her stomach and a clammy warmth surrounding her. The hum sounded very much like a vacuum running and the occasional thumps that accompanied it would support that theory. She pried one eye open to assess her surroundings. Hotel room. Okay, sure. The previous night came back to her and both eyes popped open wide. Turning her attention to the warm body wrapped around her, she confirmed that it had, in fact, actually happened. Her blonde, debutante roommate was topless and curled around her own bare chest. A goofy smile crept its way across the brunette's face.

Jo peered at the bedside table, finding out it was almost noon. Crap. They were supposed to be at the shop in an hour.

She stroked the blonde's cheek gently in an attempt to wake her. When that didn't work she leaned in to her ear. "Blair?" But the sleeping beauty just groaned and snuggled her face further into Jo's shoulder. "Blair?" she tried again, this time a little louder.

"Hrmph… no…I was having a really good dream…"

"We need to get back home."

"Whaaa…Jo?" Blair raised her head in confusion. She opened her eyes and took in their nearly naked bodies and intimate position with a puzzled expression.

"Y..yeah?…" Jo took in Blair's discombobulated state and felt dread wash over her. "Shit! I knew I should have stopped us sooner."

"We?… did that really happen?"

"Yeah, I'm sorry." Jo felt like she was going to be sick. Her fear was coming true; Blair regretted fooling around last night — and Jo was about to lose her. "Look, we can forget it happened, no sweat. No one has to know." Her voice shook as she tried to fix it. As her hand went to caress Blair's shoulder, she thought better of it. It hovered a moment before she started to sit up instead.

That's when Blair finally snapped out of her sleep fog and caught up to Jo's ramblings. "No!" Panicked, her arms tightened around the brunette. "No," she repeated, this time calmer. She brought her lips to Jo's and let her true feelings for her best friend show in her passionate kisses. "It took me a few seconds to realize it wasn't all just… some wonderful dream. That we actually did those things together," she whispered against Jo's mouth. "That you told me you love me."

It was Jo's turn to be speechless. Her heart hammered in her chest. When her words finally returned they came out in an uncontrolled wave of relief. "Oh, fuck! You scared the shit outta me!" They kissed again. "God, I do love you, and I thought I was about to lose you!"

"Oh! I'm sorry, Joey!" That was new. Blair had never called her that before. She kind of liked it. Especially when it came with hungry kisses.

"Thanks! Have a great afternoon!"

Natalie and Tootie watched Jo as if she had grown a second head. She was positively perky. It was so unnatural. The two had begun speculating about a supernatural justification, like some rendition of The Stepford Wives or Invasion of the Body Snatchers. Jo and Blair had both returned from a night out, late for their shift, without explanation, gleefully happy. Last anyone had heard, they had both decided to go to a college party the night before.

They watched curiously as the two bumped into each other, and instead of Jo's usual "Watch it, Blondie!", she just looked a little delirious and allowed Blair to pass. What they hadn't caught was the hand that had shamelessly groped Jo's ass behind the counter and out of sight.

When they noticed Jo grinning to herself, for no apparent reason, as she stacked jars on the shelf, they had to ask. "You feeling okay, Jo? You don't seem like yourself today?"

"Huh?... Oh, I guess I just had a good night is all," she smiled, shrugged and cast a subtle sideways glance in Blair's direction.

"She's too cheerful to be a pod person. They have no emotion," Natalie said to Tootie, still regarding Jo suspiciously.

"Whah?" Jo responded confused.

"Nothing." The younger girls inched away.

Jo quickly forgot about her odd friends when she caught the discreet nod from Blair directed towards the small storage room. Making sure no one was looking, she followed the blonde inside.

Immediately, she was attacked by full lips.

"You need to stop it," Blair said, once she pulled herself away.

"ME?" Jo was incredulous. "You're the one who can't keep her hands to herself. Not that I'm complainin' mind you."

"You're not acting like yourself and the others are noticing."

"I'm not allowed to be happy?"

"Not that happy." Blair wiped some of her lip gloss off Jo's mouth. "You're being too nice to everyone. Where's the gruff barbarian I know and love?"

In response, Jo pushed Blair up against the shelf, pulling her leg up around her hip, as she pressed into her firmly and kissed her deeply. Blair whimpered, but before she could provide much of a return, Jo disappeared out the door leaving her stumbling and flustered.

From the shop she heard Jo's angry holler, "O-kay! Who left the pastry case open AGAIN?!"

The End

Return to The Facts of Life Fiction

Return to Main Page