DISCLAIMER: I do not own either of these characters, I write only for my sanity.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is the first SVU fic I have sent to P&P, I hope it's not my last *g*
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.
Sickness of the Morning
Olivia Benson leant over the toilet bowl heaving her stomach contents into the stark white abyss. Groaning as another wave of sickness hit her, she muttered, "Why me?"
Months ago when she had decided to offer her services as a mother she really hadn't considered this possibility; sickness for the last three consecutive mornings and nausea after even the plainest of meals.
Sensing a presence behind her she glanced up into sympathetic blue eyes, full of love and something that looked very much like remorse. Alexandra Cabot looked down at her best friend and offered a gentle smile.
In Olivia's state of mind that was like a red rag to a bull. With flashing ebony eyes she ground out, "Don't look at me like that woman, this is all your fault. Why you couldn't be the mother, I'll never know."
Refusing to bite Alex used her best Counselor voice in an attempt to calm the raging brunette, "I wanted to, Liv, you know that, but you wanted to do it. You said, if I remember rightly, 'it's something I've always wanted to do.'"
As another bout of dry heaving gripped the prostrate detective, Alex knelt quietly at her side and gently stroked the sweat soaked bangs back from a pale, clammy forehead. Whispering quiet non-sensical words in her friend's ear, Alex waited until Olivia regained her bearings before continuing.
"Liv, I love you no matter what happens in the next 6 months, you don't have to prove yourself to me. I just want to be here for you, share the experience, you know. I married you because I want to do things with you and that means everything, not just the things you think I want to do. So if you are being sick, if you are being obnoxious, if you are unhappy, I still want to share."
A stunned Olivia stared into the eyes of her lover and saw only love and acceptance. She whispered, "You're really ok with all of this? You don't mind sharing me with a little one?"
Caressing the cheek of her older lover Alex replied, "Liv, if you have a child, you are having it with me. I love you and I'll love our children, I promise you that."
Her stomach suddenly feeling ten times better, the nausea receding, Olivia Benson thought back on her appointment the previous week, meeting up with the local branch of the Freddie Mac Foundation to discuss the adoption of under-privileged children. After witnessing, for over four years, the abuse and neglect many of these children suffered at the hands of so-called foster parents, the detective had decided she could offer them a better option.
Alex had backed her decision totally and had attended Olivia's first assessment of suitability for being a "Mother" as the detective's life-partner and to be the child's other parent. And yet, until this moment, Olivia had harbored fears that Alexandra was only playing at being interested, had even harbored fears that her younger wife was more interested in her career path.
Now, Alex's quiet entreaty had reassured the detective that her lover would be 100% involved in any fostership. Her heart lurched with love for the younger blonde.
Standing up, she pulled Alex into her arms and hugged her tightly. Before pulling back from the returned hug she whispered, "Thank you, Hon, next stop marmite sandwiches and lemonade, but please, please, darling, keep me away from damn peanut butter ones, huh?"
Alexandra laughed full and free, neither woman had known Olivia had an allergy to peanuts when she had devoured one after the other in an attempt to coax a young boy out of his shell at their assessment meeting. An allergy that had resulted in this awful nausea.
The two lovers smiled at each other, Alex taking the hand of Olivia and guiding her out of the restroom. She squeezed the still clammy hand and leant in to brush her lips over Olivia's pale cheek, before whispering, "Come on, let me take Mommy home so she can get cleaned up and have a rest."
Loved and contented Detective Olivia Benson looked forward.
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