DISCLAIMER: The characters herein are used without permission. No infringement intended.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Originally posted to my fanfiction.net account under the same title.
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.
FEEDBACK: To howlingturtle[at]hotmail.com
Talking to the Sky
By SilverTurtle
"A beautiful gift for a beautiful girl, I love you sweetie."
And she was gone. I didn't get the chance to tell her I loved her too. I had been too busy telling her that Rube wouldn't like this, and that it was against the rules. I was too busy panicking and being confused. But that was just like her to do her own thing.
Mysterious and reassuring. That's how I thought of her, and always will. She was probably the best friend I'd ever had, just my luck that I had to find her after we'd both died and she was tired of being stuck a reaper. I wish she had stayed around a little longer though.
I'm sick of losing the people I care about. I already can't contact my family, and making friends with the living is a big no-no, and now with Betty gone I had no one. Mason doesn't count; he's too busy chasing booty. Roxy is doing her own thing and is more like a mother than a friend anyway. Daisy needs to just get her ass out of my apartment and out of my hair. And Rube…well, he's my boss. I don't have anybody left that I can talk to.
God! I miss you so much Betty! What am I supposed to do without you? I know you'd want me to be strong and find enjoyment in being death but I just can't. I had a hard enough time finding enjoyment in life; it just seems doubly worthless in death. I don't understand why you had to leave!
…That's a lie. I do understand why you had to leave. You'd been a reaper for far longer than I had been. You'd collected bags and bags of pictures of the people you'd reaped. I suppose you couldn't just be the job anymore. After awhile even being a reaper loses its mystique and you have to move on. And you did say you were a jumper, not designed to stay in any one place for too long, not meant to be stuck anywhere. Being a reaper certainly tied you down.
Sometimes I wish I was more like you…but you were the only you in the whole world, living and dead. I think that's why I needed you so much. You were something, someone, I didn't understand but was drawn to for your uniqueness. You showed me that jumping was possible, I just needed to leap. I don't think I can be like you though…you were so wonderful.
"A beautiful gift for a beautiful girl, I love you sweetie."
Your words echo in my head even now. You called me beautiful and I wonder if you really meant it…but then, you never did say things you didn't mean. You'll never get to see just how much of an effect you had on me, on my soul. I think…I think I fell in love with you. I know I did love you, but it wasn't like I loved my family or friends…it was stronger, so I was in love with you. And I never got to tell you that…not that I would have had the courage to, but it still would've been nice to have the chance.
I know you probably thought of me more as a little sister and that's okay. It just helps knowing you really did love me. It may not have been the kind of love reserved for a life (or death) partner, but it was something.
I don't know why but I took such comfort from your presence. Your spontaneity and passion lit a fire in me that I don't think will ever go out. I'm trying to be more like you everyday…trying to be assertive, strong, and confident. Trying to take chances and love 'life'. It gets hard sometimes.
I wear the ring you gave me on my pinky, wishing it would fit my ring finger but knowing it never will. I think somewhere in my mind that that ring connects me to you. It connects my soul to yours…is that even possible? I don't know, but I hope so. That ring and a picture are all I have left of you and I'll attach whatever significance to them that I want, there I go trying to be like you again.
"Betty? It's George." I'm talking to the sky now…really I'm talking to you. "I don't know if you can hear me or not Betty, but I'm going to talk anyway. Thank you for being my friend. Thank you for being there for me, even if it was for such a short time. Thank you for listening and teaching and caring. Thank you for giving me this ring. Thank you for calling me beautiful and telling me you loved me."
"I know you couldn't stay here any longer but I'm going to miss you. I hope you knew that I loved you too. In case you didn't…I love you Betty. I always will and I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner. I hope that whatever you're doing now that it makes you happy and gives you plenty of opportunity to jump. Rube says you were a pistol…I'm not sure what that means exactly but I think it fits." Tears are running down my face and I think, you wouldn't want me crying, I'm supposed to be strong.
"I miss you so much. I love you. Every once in a while I'm going to talk to you, whether or not you can hear me, but I hope you can. You'll never really know how important you are to me, but maybe if I tell you I love you enough times you'll start to get the picture. I'm never going to say goodbye, not until I'm sure you're really gone…and I don't think I'll ever be sure. Instead I'm going to say until next time. So, Betty, I love you and…until next time."
The End