DISCLAIMER: No profit is intended in the writing of this story. Stargate – SG1 and its characters are the property of Metro Goldwyn Mayer.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: This story is an answer I wrote for the 'Highway-Challenge' on a german fanfic list. Enjoy.
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.
"We missed the exit."
"That's the fault of this fucking piece of garbage," Sam declared angrily and pointed her finger accusingly at the GPS device that was attached to the front window of Janet's car. It had announced the exit too late and so Janet drove by it.
"You were the one who wanted to buy this thing," Janet replied. Her slightly bitchy tone showed that she soon would be at the end of her tether. This trip was meant to be the first real acid test for the GPS and Sam had done nothing but complaining about it the whole time.
"Because everyone says, this manufacturer is the best."
"USE THE EXIT IN 100 METRES," the GPS declared.
"See," exclaimed Sam. "That's no more than 70 metres." Frustrated she ruffled her hair.
Well-behaved Janet followed the order and shortly after they were on their way again. She couldn't say anything bad about the GPS. That it had an electronic hick-up from time to time was not the end of the world. The handbook said that high trees or mountains could jamm the GPS-reception for a short time. After all, this was Colorado, woods and mountains are a part of the country.
A while ago Janet had talked Sam into buying a GPS-device for their car. She had thought it would be a nice gadet for Sam to play with. But as they finally had bought it and unpacked it in their kitchen Sam found the screen too small, the CPU too slow, the orders given by voice sometimes too late... And... And.... And...
Janet only hoped that Sam didn't get the idea of 'improving' the GPS.
"You know, I could..."
Too late, Janet thought.
"...put in a new CPU. And eventually a new GPS-receiver. The GPS would be much more effective and..."
"You said the same thing as you tried to 'improve' our DVD-player so it could play HD-DVDs as well," Janet interrupted. "Your modified laser burned a hole through the DVD."
Sam shifted in her seat. "But only because the technical parameters from the manufacturer about the amplitude of oscillation..."
"Don't try to talk yourself out of this, baby." Janet thought it was time to cool down the situation. Sam liked it if Janet gave her pet names. It was a very private thing just between them.
Sam smiled and squeezed Janet's knee. "It annoys me to pay a lot of money for something and then it didn't match my standards."
"TURN RIGHT IN 300 METRES."
"See! That thing has a deviation of at least 20 metres." Sam glared at the GPS.
"Sam, we don't want to steer a Cruise Missle into a window. I can live with 20 metres deviation."
"But..." Sam tried to protest but Janet cut her short.
"You remember the sales clerk in the electronic store? You drove him into desperation with your questions." Janet looked at Sam smiling.
Sam blushed embarrassed thinking about the poor guy. "But I could have a look at the software. Modifying it, making it more elegant and faster..."
Sam's tone showed Janet that Sam was about to surrender and her resistance was only symbolic. "No, Sam."
Frustrated Sam leant back in her seat. "You never let me have fun, honey."
Janet threw a brief glance at her girlfriend and smiled. "I thought our vacation at that resort was meant to have fun. You remember? King Size whirlpools in every suite." She wiggled her eyebrows.
Sam straightened in her seat. This was meant to be their first weekend together for months. She wouldn't let it be ruined because of this chickenfeed. "You're right. I promise not to speak about that thing again." She nodded at the GPS.
"YOU HAVE REACHED YOUR DESTINATION."
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