DISCLAIMER: NBC owns the rights to Law and Order: SVU. I'm just
burrowing the characters for entertainment. No money is being made,
and no harm is intended. I like to tie in music with my work, so
you'll be seeing a lot of music interlaced with this story.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is my first attempt at Olivia/Alex fan fic. I hope it's okay.
ARCHIVING: Only with the permission of the author.
The Take Down
By Berg
Part 8
Alex heard her cell phone ringing but she chose to ignore it. Finally after the forth time she answered. "What?"
"Cabot?"
"Yes."
"It's Cragen," the Captain said.
"Yes, what is it Captain?"
"I think you need to come down to the station now."
"Isn't there someone else you can call? Is it important? I'm in the middle of a date."
"It's Benson."
Alex felt her heart stop and her breath cease. "What is it?" she asked getting up from the table and grabbing her jacket.
"Alex? What is it? Where are you going?" her date asked. Alex didn't respond. She just rushed out the door.
Alex stood outside the window watching Olivia hooked up to the tubes and breathing machine. She knew Elliot and Cragen were talking to her but she wasn't hearing them. She felt like she was in a dream. Elliot looked at his Captain and pulled him away, giving Alex a moment alone.
She lowered her head and felt the tears wash down. She placed her hand to the glass and knew that in that moment she'd give anything just to touch Olivia…to give her the comfort she knew she needed.
"Are you family?" the nurse asked.
"No…no," Alex said softly and shook her head. "She's my…my…"
"I think I know what you're saying," the nurse nodded her head in understanding. "You can go in."
"Thank you," Alex said softly as she made her way into the ICU.
"They're both dead sir," Stabler said.
"Good…" Cragen said under his breath making sure no one heard him. "Jesus Elliot, tell me they didn't…didn't…"
"No sir. Nothing. She took a bad beating from those bastards but we found her on time."
"Thank God," Cragen said. Munch and Fin approached.
"How is she?" Fin asked softly worried about Elliot. He knew how much Elliot cared for Olivia, how he always looked out for her and vice versa.
"She's in bad shape. But she's tough. She's going to be okay," Elliot said looking back to the room. "I can't believe this happened."
"Me either," Munch said. "The bartender working with the guy. It makes sense. That's why Olivia never knew…she was anticipating the suspect to put something in her drink, little did she know she already had the damn drug in her system."
"Well I want a tight lid on this," Cragen said. "No press leaks. We'll wait for Cabot to make a statement tomorrow."
"Where is Cabot?" Fin asked looking around.
"Benson," Alex said softly sitting down next to her. "Liv…Olivia."
All she heard in response was the soft whizzing of the breathing machine. "God Olivia…I can't stand to look at you like this. I mean…this isn't you. This isn't the Olivia I know." Alex looked around to make sure she had privacy. "Please open your eyes and laugh at me. Hell, yell at me if you want to. Just open those beautiful brown eyes of yours."
"She'll be okay," Elliot said softly as he came into the room unnoticed. Alex pulled away from Olivia, again, as though she was caught doing something she shouldn't.
"You don't have to do that," Elliot said shaking his head. "Not for my account."
"Do what?"
Elliot just held her gaze for a moment. "You know what Alex." He paused. Alex felt a soft hand placed on her own. She and Elliot looked down to see Olivia with one open eye. Her other eye was swollen shut.
"There's my champ," Elliot smiled. He looked up at Alex. "I'll go get a nurse." He left them alone.
"Olivia," Alex said softly. "Thank God," she whispered. She reached down and caressed the side of Olivia's face that had not been beaten. She felt the tears flow freely now.
Olivia looked around her room. Four days later and she was feeling better already. Her sides still ached…but all else was on its way back to normal. "Hey stranger."
"Not more flowers," Olivia laughed. "I've got no more room."
"Well the family sends their love," Elliot smiled.
"They're really too sweet."
"Already have four ready to serve home cooked meals ready for you when they spring you this afternoon."
"She didn't," Olivia laughed.
"Oh…she did," Elliot smiled. "Even your favorite."
"Chili?"
"Is there any other?"
"God…I can't wait to get out of here Stabler…it's driving me mad." Olivia laughed.
"I can imagine," Elliot looked around her room. "Mind if I take a peak?"
"Please by all means."
Elliot glanced at all the cards. There was some from Finch. There were some from the DA's office. Flowers from Munch, Cragen, and the rest of the SVU crew. There were two different sets from Alex.
"Well…don't you have some major fans."
"I'm popular what can I say."
"She been here since the other day?" Elliot asked softly.
"Boy you waste no time do you?" Olivia asked laughing. "No…she has not."
"She called?"
"Yes. Once."
"So…"
"So…" Olivia mimicked Elliot's voice. "Elliot," she said finally and smiled. "We're just friends."
"Okay…I won't push it."
"Good."
"But you didn't see her that night Liv. Wow- was she worried and upset about you."
"Really?" Olivia asked intrigued.
"Oh yeah," Elliot smiled and sat down to give her the story.
Alex heard the gavel fall and nodded. She gathered her folders and glanced at her watch. Olivia would be getting out from the hospital shortly. She had promised her she would come by and make her dinner.
"Alex?"
"Serena," Alex smiled. "Hi."
"How are you doing?"
"Good. You?"
"So far so good. I've got a case next in here."
"Good luck," Alex smiled.
"How is Detective Benson?" Serena asked. "She feeling any better?"
"Little but yeah," Alex nodded. "She gets out today."
"Good. Give her my best will you…that is…if you see her."
Alex nodded and walked away.
There was a soft knock at the door. "I'll get it!" Olivia yelled out to no one. "I love to say that," she smiled as she opened the door.
"Hey," Alex smiled. "May I come in?"
"That depends," Olivia lifted her eyebrow. "You here to cook for me?"
"Yes I am."
"By all means…come in." Olivia opened the door fully as Alex made her way in. Olivia saw the bag Alex carried with her. "What's that?"
"An overnight bag," Alex smiled. "I thought…well I know how tough it's going to be the next few days…and having an extra set of hands and someone to help out around here might come in handy."
"You'd do that for me?" Olivia asked.
"Of course," Alex smiled.
"You can put your stuff in the bedroom," Olivia said pointing in the distance.
"Okay," Alex smiled and made herself at home. "But I have your word you won't charge me rent?" Alex asked with a smile.
"Heck no…you clean and cook for me…we'll call rent even." Olivia answered as she winced slightly.
"When was the last time you had your pain meds?" Alex asked.
"Ahhh…"
"Olivia…you got to take those." Alex said sternly.
"I hate the way they make me feel Alex," Olivia whined.
"God you sound worse then a little kid," Alex mumbled and handed Olivia two pills.
"Take them before I use excess force."
"A threat- hum…new scare tactic?"
"Do you really want to find out?" Alex asked smiling.
"Not in this condition no," Olivia nodded and took the pills.
"Should I make you open up and say ah?" Alex asked and then shook her head. "I don't want to know what kind of dirty little things are running through your mind right now."
Olivia just smiled.
"So…dinner was great," Olivia said. "Thanks."
"It was my pleasure. I like cooking for you," Alex smiled. "You always eat it and you always compliment it. You're going to make some…person very happy someday."
And there it was. The things they'd bee skating around since that night before Olivia's attack. Before Alex's realization.
"Woman," Olivia said softly and held Alex's eyes with her own. "I will make some woman very happy."
"Woman," Alex smiled softly and nodded.
"Alex I think we should talk," Olivia said.
"We don't have to," Alex spoke up. "I think we both are clear."
"No…I don't think we are," Olivia said shaking her head. "I need you to understand a few things."
"Okay," Alex nodded seeing Olivia was very serious.
"First…I don't do this…" Olive said pausing. "I don't open myself up to many people. You're on a small list of chosen few."
"Thank you."
"Alex…I don't think it'll come as a shock if I tell you I care about you. A lot."
"No. No it wouldn't."
"But I don't expect anything…you've made your feelings in that department very clear." Olivia said looking out the window. She closed her eyes and let out a soft sigh.
"What is it?" Alex asked. She had a thousand different things she wanted to say, but knew they could wait.
"I'm getting tired," Olivia said softly.
"Me too…"
"Bed?"
"Sure…I'll just need to borrow a blanket and pillow for the couch." Alex said pointing to the bedroom.
"Alex…I have a king size bed. Plenty of room for two…with plenty of 'comfort' and 'space' necessary." Olivia walked to the room without turning back.
"Are you sure?" Alex asked following in her footsteps. Olivia turned around and held Alex's knowing glance for a second. She smiled softly.
"Positive. Come…time for bed. You can even read me a bedtime story," Olivia winked.
"Oh I left my copy of Goodnight Moon at home," Alex smiled back. "I'll be right back. I'm just going to change into something to sleep in."
"What you don't do nude? I do…I hope that won't be a problem?" Olivia giggled. "I couldn't even get that out without laughing. So much for my lying face. Man, these pain killers are kicking my butt."
"Yeah yeah," Alex mumbled and closed the door.
A few minutes later, teeth brushed, hair combed, face washed, and pajamas on…Alex emerged from the bathroom. "I love your bathroom Olivia. It's so warm. And your tub…how wonderful. I was thinking about a porcelain tub for my bathroom. Did it come with the apartment or did you put it in yourself?" Alex ask as she climbed in under the covers.
"Olivia?" She was met with a snore. Alex smiled as she shifted in the bed. Olivia was on her side facing Alex. Alex lay on her back and looked up at the ceiling. She closed her eyes for a moment and thought how funny life had been lately. Here she was sharing a bed with a beautiful woman who intrigued her, amazed her, and constantly made her question the life she'd chosen. And still…she was afraid of so many things.
She wondered what it would be like if she let go of it all. Her fears. Her insecurities. She took a deep breath and let out a heavy sigh. Slowly she turned her head and caught sight of the woman sleeping next to her.
"You're the most amazing thing I have in my life Olivia Benson. Someday…I'll be able to tell that to you when you're awake," Alex said softly. She ever so gently leaned forward and placed a kiss on Olivia's forehead.
Olivia let out a soft sigh in her sleep as an arm came out and wrapped itself around Alex's waste. Alex froze. For a moment she though Olivia might be awake.
"Love you," Olivia murmured only to be followed by more snoring sounds. Alex felt a tear creep out and down her cheek.
Part 9
Alex woke up that morning to find Olivia wrapped around her, with a leg draped over her own thigh. She smiled and enjoyed the warmth the beautiful detective provided. She felt safe, loved…and for the first time in a long time…happy.
Olivia slowly came out of her sleep. She slowly moved. Alex closed her eyes quickly and pretended to be asleep. Olivia creped open an eye and noticed she wasn't alone. She quickly remembered Alex was in her bed with her, she had stayed the night to keep an eye on her. Olivia smiled at the sincere thought.
What is that? Olivia wondered as she quickly realized there was a mound of flesh below her hand. Both eyes popped open and she quickly and quietly pulled out from her grip on Alex. "God," she let out a sigh. "Smooth move Benson," she mumbled and decided coffee was in order. She closed the door behind her.
"How'd you sleep?" Olivia asked, as Alex emerged showered and changed for work.
"Good…actually…amazingly well," Alex answered honestly. "You?"
"Good," Olivia nodded. "Coffee?"
"Wonderful," Alex agreed. "Thank you."
"Don't thank me…thank Mr. Green Mountain breakfast blend. He's the real hero."
"So what do you have planned for today?" Alex asked as she sipped her coffee.
"TV…TV…and then some TV. You?"
"I have a hearing first thing this morning. Speaking of hearings, I should be able to be home by like…five tonight. So I'll make us dinner then," Alex said as she gathered up her briefcase. Olivia just smiled and shook her head.
"What?" Alex asked amused.
"Nothing…I just…forget it."
"What? Tell me please."
"I…it was the way you said you'd be home…it was cute. Ignore me though…I'm on pain killers," Olivia smiled. "Have a good day dear," she mocked.
"Thank you honey," Alex winked and took the offered paper. Se went to the door and waved as she closed it. Her smile quickly faded as she realized…she was enjoying this game…a lot.
Olivia stood on the other side of the door and smiled. "What was that?" she asked no one as she plopped down on the couch and started channel surfing.
"Hello?" Olivia said.
"Hey Benson," Fin smiled.
"Hey yourself. What's up?"
"Calling to see how you're holding up?"
"Can't complain," Olivia mumbled through half closed eyes.
"You said tired."
"Yeah…well four different kinds of pain killers and antibiotics would kick your ass too," Olivia smiled.
"Point taken," Fin laughed.
"Can I call you back later?"
"No need. Just wanted to see how the hero was holding up."
"Thanks, I'm fine." Olivia shook her head.
"Good to hear," Fin said. He paused for a moment. "Munch wants to know if you want him to come over and tuck you in?"
"Only he if wants an ass kicking," Olivia chuckled.
"You don't want me to say that Liv…I think he's into the kinky stuff."
Alex opened the door with the key Olivia had given her. "I'm hom…I'm here," she said softly. "Hello?" There was no answer. "Olivia?"
Alex put her briefcase down and wandered around the apartment area. "Liv?" Still no answer. Alex felt her heart sink as panic rose. "God," she mumbled as she started dashing around the apartment. She rushed into Olivia's bedroom to find no one there. She flung the half open bathroom door and stormed in.
There, laying calmly in a tub was a very naked Olivia with ear phones on, eyes closed, humming softly. Alex's mouth hung open for a brief second as she gulped. She tried to steer her eyes else where but they slowly lowered and took in the whole sight of the naked Detective. She backed out of the room slowly and closed the door with her. She glanced down at her watch. She was earlier then she had planned. She shook her head and smiled thankful her friend was okay.
Later that night both women slept. "No…no get off me…get off," Olivia mumbled in her sleep as she pushed off Alex who was at the other end of the bed. "no...leave her alone…no."
"Liv?" Alex asked through half closed eyes. "What's wrong?"
"Alex…no…don't…don't leave please…"
Alex could feel the sweat and heat radiating from Olivia's body. "Olivia," Alex said softly trying to wake her friend. "it's okay. It's just a dream."
"Mom…mama…" Olivia began to weep softly as gentle sobs wracked her body.
Alex wasn't sure what to do…so she did what came naturally. She pulled Olivia close and held her while she wept in her sleep.
"So…you're sleeping with her now?" Serena asked sipping from her coffee.
"Don't say it like that," Alex said hushing her friend. "God."
"What?" Serena smiled. "Did I embarrass you?" she winked.
"We're just friends," Alex said. "I'm staying with her for a few days to keep an eye on her till she's all better."
"Um-huh," Serena smiled. "Giving her what she needs huh?"
"I'm not…we're not…we're just friends. Don't make me keep saying it."
"Well Alex," Serena smiled, "I've got lots of close friends. And I've never shared a bed with any of them."
Alex opened her mouth and closed it. Any argument lost on her lips. Serena just watched her. "Alex…you can talk to me about anything. You know that. We're friends."
"There's nothing to talk about," Alex answered.
"Okay. If you say so," Serena answered. She could pull something out of Alex she didn't want to share.
"So…do you have a date for the ball next week?" Alex asked.
"I was thinking about going stag," Serena said. "But then again…where is the fun in that."
"Good point," Alex smiled.
"You have a date?" Serena asked.
"No. Not yet."
"Are you planning on asking anyone?"
"Richard actually," Alex answered.
"Richard?" Serena raised her nose. "I thought…maybe…"
"No."
"Why not? Even if you just go as friends."
"Serena look where we are," Alex said softly. "If I want to make that top seat…"
"That's what this is about?' Serena said slightly upset and a bit caught off guard. "Your job and what people will think?"
"It's not that easy Serena," Alex said coolly.
"No…not when you make it so complicated it's not," Serena said standing. "Cabot I never would have figured you a fool."
"Excuse me?"
"You'll figure it out," Serena said softly. "See you later." Alex just watched her go.
Olivia walked through the door of the precinct. It felt good to be back. She smiled as she watched Alex walking down the hall, late for an appointment.
"Here she is," Elliot smiled. "Welcome back Benson."
"Good to be back," Olivia nodded. "So did it all fall to shit with me gone?" she winked.
"We've been waiting your return," Fin said smiling as he walked up and gave Olivia a hug. Munch and Elliot did as well. "Welcome back Olivia."
"What? No cake?" Olivia smiled.
"Stabler. Benson. My office please," Cragen said from his door. Elliot looked at Olivia.
"You haven't been back long enough to tic him off…have you?" he wondered with a wink.
"Who knows?" Olivia said standing. They walked into his office.
"What's up Captain?" Stabler asked taking a seat. Olivia preferred to stand.
"I.A. is investigating us," Cragen said clearly upset.
"What?" both Benson and Stabler asked in unison.
"You heard me right." Cragen said. "We've been under surveillance since Liv's cases went under personal attack year."
"What? Because some nut job decides to take out a personal attack on me IA thinks we're not doing our jobs?" Olivia felt her voice rise.
"Keep your voice down Olivia," Cragen said trying to calm his Detective.
"This is BS Captain," Stabler said. "We have not done anything wrong."
"I know that. You know that. But they don't." Cragen said looking through some paper work. "They're going to be interviewing Cabot, Fin, Munch, and the two of you."
"Why Alex?" Olivia asked curious. "What would she have to do with this?"
"Seems that they feel her…personal…feelings have let her make choices and decisions that under normal circumstances she'd not have made." Cragen looked up and let his eyes linger long on Olivia.
"What the hell does that mean?" Olivia asked clearly angry. "They're going to hang her out to dry to get to me?"
"No…it means that they're looking for any and every slip we've made…and the ADA is no exception. Listen Benson…this isn't personal….her ties to you…whatever they are- they're your business and her own. I think what IA is referring to is all the times we…as in all of us…have asked her to bend the law just a bit too much. I think it might have broken the camels back."
Olivia shook her head and looked at Elliot. "This is bull."
"I know," he nodded.
Part 10
"Cabot."
"Alex…"
"I take it your Captain spoke with you," Alex said into her phone. She was hoping Olivia would call.
"I'm so sorry you're being dragged into this," Olivia said softly.
"It's not your fault," Alex laughed. "Besides, I've done nothing wrong. Neither have you. It's okay."
"What a great first day back let me tell you," Olivia mumbled. "It's not even ten and I want a drink." Alex chuckled when she heard her name being called.
"I've got to let you go Detective. I'm being called."
"Good luck," Olivia said. "See you later maybe?"
"Sure," Alex smiled warmly. For some reason, her day just perked up.
Alex Cabot wore a black short skirt that was just above her knees with a low cut shirt that was very professional if not appealing to the eye. She knew when she walked through the station she could turn a few heads.
She wasn't being egotistical; she just knew she could catch a few eyes. She smiled enjoying the look she got from Detective Benson, who just watched her for a second and then looked back down at her desk like she found something suddenly very interesting there.
"Cabot, good. You're here," Cragen said coming out of his office.
"Yes. What can I do for you?"
"We're looking for some warrants on a few cases. Can you come into my office?"
"Sure," Alex smiled walking away. She knew she was swaying her hips more then necessary, but what the heck. She paused as she entered the door to the Captain's office and glanced back one more time to see both Elliot and Olivia watching her. She closed the door.
"You're a married man," Olivia said glancing at Elliot. "Shame on you."
"Well I'm still alive. Geez-" he smiled looking at Olivia. "Besides, what's your excuse?"
"Me? I was not starring."
"Oh yes you were too," Elliot said smiling.
"Was not," Benson mumbled.
"Yeah you were," Munch said from across the room. "Sorry Liv. But I'd have to agree with Stabler on this one."
"Me three," Fin chimed in and smiled.
"Shut up guys," Olivia said looking around.
"What do we have?" Stabler asked the young beat cop who looked pretty sick to his stomach.
"Female. DOA. Approximately 29 years old. GSW to the head."
"God," Olivia said looking at Stabler. "Looks like she was at least 6 months pregnant," Olivia said shocked.
"Sometimes…I hate this job," Elliot said looking at Olivia and hanging his head.
"I hear ya," Olivia mumbled lowering herself to get a closer look. "Look at the bruising on her arms, and neck…"
"Struggle," Stabler asked.
"I'd say so…MD will have to get a better look." Olivia stood. "We need this blocked off and a CSI team in here."
"I'll call them," Stabler said pulling out his radio.
"Elliot…wait," Olivia said putting on latex gloves.
"What is it Benson?"
"Look," Olivia said pulling up the sleeve to the victims shirt. "Look familiar?"
"You're kidding me," Stabler said looking at his partner as he clearly recognized the 'infinity' tattoo marking on the victims wrist.
"I think it's time to pay Dr. Garrett Lang a visit," Benson said locking eyes with Stabler.
"What do we have?" Cragen asked.
"As of yet unidentified female, approximately 28 years old. We're running finger prints and checking missing persons. If this MO is the same from the last time we're keeping all options open."
"Stabler and I are going to see Lang tomorrow," Benson said looking up from her note pad. "Though I doubt he'll be forthright with information."
"Benson I wonder if you'd be better going in this alone," Cragen asked. "He seemed much more open to you then to Stabler."
"Sir…I'm not sure that's such a good idea," Elliot said speaking up. "I mean…"
"I can handle it," Olivia said looking Elliot down. "I'll be okay."
"But…"
"Elliot," Olivia nodded understanding where his fears came from. "It's a prison ward…I don't think anything can happen."
"Right. Sorry," Elliot said motioning for the chief to go on.
"We're having the guard do a check of his cell. I want a list of visitors as well as tabs on outgoing mail from this point on," Cragen said. "Okay Benson…it's in your court now."
"Men and their sport analogies," she said shaking her head.
"Force of habit," Stabler smiled.
"Elliot…" Olivia said pulling him aside. "You know I'm better now. I mean…being a cop, taking a risk…it's part of the job. You don't have to worry so much."
"I know," Elliot said softly looking around. "I'm sorry. I over stepped my bounds."
"No…you were concerned. I'd be the same way. It's okay," she smiled. "It's cute really."
The soft knock at the door broke Alex out of her work mode. She looked at the clock and wondered who would be stopping by so late. Glancing out the peep hole she saw Detective Benson glancing down the hallway. She opened the latch and then unlocked the door. "Hello," she smiled.
"It's not too late is it?" Olivia asked.
"No not at all. Come on it," Alex smiled. "I was just working on a closing statement for tomorrow's case."
"I can come back," Olivia gestured toward the door.
"Don't be silly. Come on it," Alex motioned for Olivia to take a seat. "Can I get you a drink?"
"Do you have any soda?"
"Diet Coke and Sprite."
"I'll have a diet coke please," Olivia smiled.
"Can or glass?"
"So many choices," Olivia teased. "I'll take it form the can please."
"Be right back," Alex said standing and grabbing the drink. She returned. "So what's with the late night visit?"
"Well actually," Olivia paused and smiled. "You look adorable in jeans. You should wear them more often."
Alex felt a blush cross her face. "I doubt the court would like that. But I'll keep it in mind," she said sipping from her own soda. "You were saying?"
"Oh…yeah…so this charity ball thing…well I was wondering if you wanted to go with me. Not as a date…well I mean…yes a date, but not like a date date you know? I mean you probably already have a date so it's silly I'm even asking," Olivia rambled on. Alex just enjoyed the feeling of the moment she was sharing with Olivia.
"I'm sorry," Alex said softly knowing she'd have to break it.
"Already spoken for?" Olivia asked.
"Yes. I'm bringing Richard."
"Oh. Okay."
"It's not that I wouldn't love to go with you…believe me I would. I just…"
"Have a boyfriend," Olivia finished for her and finished her drink. "I don't know why I even asked," she said softly. "Of course you'd have a date."
"Olivia," Alex said. "It's not that. It's just that I…well I mean…"
"What?" Olivia asked smiling. She loved the way Alex looked when she was considering her words. It was almost poetic.
"Well I don't think the two of us showing up together would be such a good idea you know?" Alex laughed nervously. "I'm sure the rumors are already flying as is about us."
"What do you mean?" Olivia asked confused.
"Well we're together a lot."
"Yeah. So?"
"Well…I just mean it probably would give people the wrong idea," Alex finished. "You know what I mean?" Olivia just watched Alex with a sad expression. Alex knew the minute the words had left her mouth they were a mistake and she knew she just hurt the one person she cared for more than anything or anyone.
"Sadly…yes," Olivia nodded. "I guess we wouldn't want that." Olivia stood.
"Where are you going?" Alex asked sad to see Olivia leaving.
"I'll see you at work Cabot," Olivia said sadly.
"Wait…I didn't explain myself clear enough Olivia." Alex felt panic shoot through her body. What had she just done.
"No…I think you made yourself perfectly clear." Olivia closed the door behind her and wiped the fallen tear.
Part 11
Olivia opened up her apartment door, closed and locked it behind her. She let out a sigh from the long and now worse day she'd had in awhile. "Stupid," she mumbled and shook her head. "What did you think would happen? Did you think she'd declare her love for you? Did you think she'd kiss you? Did you even think she'd say yes?"
Olivia saw she had new messages. She pushed the button.
"Hey Olivia," Fin had said softly. "Don't forget you got coffee duty tomorrow. You asked me to call and remind you. So…I'm calling and I've reminded. See ya."
BEEP
"Olivia…you just left here. You're not answering your cell. Look…I'm sorry if I hurt you. Seems I keep doing that when I don't mean to. I'm just looking out for our best interest is all. I hope you understand. Anyway…I'm sorry. I'll call you tomorrow. Bye."
BEEP
"Hey you…it's Mel. I was thinking about you. About us. Anyway…I had a great time at dinner. I don't think I told you that before. I'm going to be in town next weekend and I thought maybe we could get together again. You…you looked great Olivia. Call me, okay? Bye."
BEEP. "You have no more messages."
Olivia pulled out her cell and dialed the number she had gotten to know so well as of late. "Hey, it's me."
"I was hoping you'd call."
"So…about dinner. How would you like to be my date to a ball?"
Mel laughed. "There are no pumpkins and mice involved right?"
"No," Olivia smiled. "Just me."
"Well in that case…I'd be honored."
Lang looked at Olivia through the glass. "Miss me?" he asked smiling.
"You wish," Olivia said.
"So what can I do for you?"
"Do you know her?" Olivia asked holding out a photograph of the woman they had found in the alley. Lang glanced down and took in the picture for a moment.
"God," he whispered. "She's…where is she? What happened to her?"
"You know her then?"
"Yes…I know her."
"She another one of your 'heal the world make it a better place' groupies?" Olivia asked.
"Where is she?" Lang asked again. "Tell me."
"She's dead Dr. Lang…or don't you already know?"
"Dead?" he asked feeling a sickness fall over him. "The baby?"
"Yes."
"Oh God," Lang said as tears began to fall. "What did I do?"
"What are you talking about?" Olivia asked. "Do you know what happened to them? Tell me Doctor. Do you know?"
"She…she was my wife. She was carrying our baby."
"Your wife?" Olivia asked caught off guard. This was a curve ball she had not been expecting. "You're not married."
"I…no not legally…but spiritually. She…she's been my wife for 8 years."
"Where was she during the trial?"
"I sent her away. She…"
"Her baby…was this another one of your experiments?"
"No…no…that baby was mine…fathered the natural way," Lang said. "Who did this Detective?"
"I'll be back in touch with you," Olivia said standing. She looked back and took in the once arrogant and pompous man she knew who now cried and wept openly.
"Stabler."
"Oh Detective Stabler…I was looking for Detective Benson," Alex said surprised when Elliot answer Olivia's phone.
"She's not here. She up meeting Lang for the follow up on the vic from yesterday."
"Lang?" Alex said a bit worried. "She went alone?"
"Yeah- Captains orders," Elliot said sighing. "Want me to take a message?"
"No…no that's fine. Just let her know I called."
"No problem," Stabler said jotting down a note.
"Thanks," she said hanging up her phone and looking down at her lab top. Her mind was off in a thousand different placed. The soft knock at her door woke her from her deep thoughts. She looked up to see Serena coming in.
"Hi," Alex said.
"Hi," Serena replied. "Look…I came to say I was sorry about yesterday."
"Why?"
"Cause I think…or at least I feel that I overstepped my bounds."
"No. Don't worry about it." Alex waved her off.
"Sure you're not mad?"
"Positive."
"Okay then. Well I better file these," Serena smiled. "Have a good day."
"Serena…wait a second," Alex said stopping her friend. "Can you come in here and close the door?"
"Sure," Serena said closing the door behind her and taking a seat. "What's up?"
"I…you seem so sure of something between Olivia and I. Why is it? Just simply because she's gay?"
"No. Not at all," Serena said slightly hurt her friend would imply that. "Alex two women can be friends and nothing more if one of them is gay or bi-sexual. I'm not stupid."
"But why then the assumption of Detective Benson and I?"
"Well I'm not blind," Serena smiled. "Have you ever taken a step outside of your environment and got a good look of the interaction you and Benson share?"
"No."
"Well you should sometime. You two are quite the team. It's actually amusing to watch." Serena caught her friend's face. "Alex…can I ask you a question?"
"Yes."
"Do you like her?"
"Of course. She's a wonderful friend…"
"No Alex," Serena cut her off. "Do you like her," Serena said emphasizing the 'like' this time. Alex considered the words for just a moment.
"I'm confused."
"Why?"
"What do you mean?" Alex asked.
"What's there to be confused about? She's beautiful, smart, funny, and quite frankly one of the most astonishing people I know. She likes you. You like her…why not go for it?"
"I'm worried…"
"Alex what if she's the one you've been looking for your whole life and you let her slip away because of your career? Your fear?"
"Good point," Alex agreed. "Thanks."
"What are friends for?" Serena smiled. "Now I got to get back to work. Have a good one."
"You too," Alex said as Serena smiled at her one last time and slipped out the office door.
BEEP
"Olivia, it's Alex again. It's day three of you not returning my phone calls. I know you're hurt and upset. I don't blame you at all. What I said…it was stupid and I shouldn't have said it. I'm sorry. I just hope I didn't ruin the best thing I have in my life," Alex sighed. She paused. "I don't care what people think. I miss you. Call me please."
Alex hung up the phone. It had been three days since her conversation with Serena. Three days since she'd last seen or heard from Olivia. The few times she had to make it over to the station, Olivia was busy with paperwork, or wouldn't even make eye contact. It broke Alex's heart.
"I'm so sorry," she said softly as she felt tears creep down her cheek.
Olivia sat in the darkness of her living room staring at the machine. She wanted so badly to pick up the phone and just talk with Alex. But Olivia knew she had to be strong, had to do this for herself.
"I just can't let myself get hurt again," she said softly as she hugged the pillow.